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AIBU?

Actually disgusted with myself

150 replies

Jumpingjosephene21 · 25/11/2020 22:56

I'm so disgusted with how fat I've let myself get during lockdown. I drink too much, I'm sat at a desk all day and I eat crap. I've always struggled with my weight but before lockdown I would walk, exercise and eat OKish. Now I just seem to have lost all self control and routine. And it shows. I've put on at least two stone in lockdown. My face is bloated and my belly is massive.

I don't know why I'm posting. I just need a kick up the arse to change my habits. I'm stuck in a big rut. Can anyone help? On an average day I eat a lot of bread and carbs. I snack on junk like crisps and biscuits and I drink maybe 3-4 nights a week which is also empty calories.

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CockleburIck · 26/11/2020 09:48

I’ve been somewhat similar to @Pinkcadillac, and have had some success. I hope some of this may help, OP:

In the last two weeks I’ve narrowed my ‘eating window’ from 11 to 7 (will have coffee and water before then), tried to eat fewer carbs, only drink on Fridays and Saturdays and have increased my dog walk from 1hr 15 to 2 hours. I’ve lost 7 pounds already and am delighted.
It’s not even that challenging.

It did take me a while to get on top of the drinking; several “dry” months here and there (individual months, not consecutive) over the past couple of years helped to reduce the craving. Also, alcohol free drinks helped. Now I’m much more in control.

OP don’t try to do too much at once or you’ll bomb. Good luck.

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silverbubbles · 26/11/2020 09:49

You need a support group to help you do. There are lots of suggestions.
Mine is dropit21. find it on face book

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Hm2020 · 26/11/2020 09:56

Most people I know have done the same don’t beat yourself up about it honestly

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Galwaygirl · 26/11/2020 09:58

I can be so good during g the day but come the evening I can eat all around me, it makes me feel so disappointed, I am walking every day also. Read on a magazine that being goo during the week and eating what you like at weekends can add 2/3 lbs per weekend, have to stop and trying g to make a conscious effort, suffering terribly with stomach issues at the moment because of diet

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ExConstance · 26/11/2020 10:05

Another one here. It has not helped that I work in care and have been working flat our and totally stressed all year, have not even been able to take my holiday. It does not help that my friends have been either furloughed or are retired and go on and on about how they are doing lots of running and cycling, building up fitness to avoid being very ill if they get Covid and posting fatuous and ridiculous quotes and pictures in social media about it all. I get home from work and just eat and eat, before going to bed very early. Sleeping and eating are the only things that ring me comfort. The gym re-opens next week so I have booked a couple of classes, but don't think my gym clothes fit any more. I feel ashamed of my self too.

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Yeahnahmum · 26/11/2020 10:07

Put a photo up from when you thought you looked good. Do a 30 day Challenge and eat less carbs (set a goal. Say 150 carbs a day max) in that 30 days you drink a lot of water and no alcohol.

It will reset your stomach and your brain... and you will feel heaps better for it. Plus it is only 30 days. And after that it will be easier for your body to adapt to eat a bit less/healthier etc.

Now . here comes the kick up the bottom Today is the last day you'll eat shit and feel like shit! !! Stop feeling sorry for yourself and get going! Tomorrow you'll do this. And you CAN do this. And you will😚

Ps make it 28/29 days RE Christmas.
And then on the first of jan 2021 you can do this 30 day Challenge again.

You can do iittttt!!!

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museumum · 26/11/2020 10:10

I identify so much with you @Jumpingjosephene21- i too am struggling with the lack of 'treat' or 'reward' or just anything to look forward to. I found a glass of wine or slice of cake to be the highlight of my week in lockdown and that is just depressing.

I honestly couldn't bear to completely cut out carbs, wine and caffeine right now... but instead I'm trying to find healthy things to look forward to and 'reward' myself with. I'm making more effort to meet up outdoors with friends for walks, cycles etc for example. I realised a couple of weeks ago that I'd stopped making social arrangements (always waiting for 'after covid') but actually more meet ups are helping.
Good luck to us all!

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TheRealHousewife · 26/11/2020 10:11

@ExConstance Flowers thank you for all you do. I really understand your comment re:- sleep & food. If you are sleep deprived you’ll have higher ghrelin, cortisol and leptin levels which sabotage any weight loss and healthy eating endeavours as they raise appetite.

Try to allow yourself time for some self care, you absolutely deserve it!

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Jumpingjosephene21 · 26/11/2020 10:11

I've just been for a 3k walk with the dog and feel lots better for it! Now eggs for breakfast.

Thanks guys I will do this. Definitely going to cut the booze out. That's my main problem. And bread is going too. This week I've had wraps, bagels, sandwiches, toast, thick bread and butter. It's not good.

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S111n20 · 26/11/2020 10:11

I’m the same put over a stone on during lockdown. All these articles about people losing weight, never been in better shape during lockdown really pisses me off 😂😂 not only that I’m going through telogen effuvluim so feel fat and bald 🤭

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Twigletgirl27 · 26/11/2020 10:16

I've literally just come in from a walk, where I bumped into a lady and while chatting she pointed to my stomach and said "are you...."? Obviously implying I'm pregnant. Don't know whether to be flattered (I'm bloody 54!) or horrified. She was mortified of course! My problem is gin also, can eat well most of the day but like gin most evenings when watching tv. This leads to snacking on crisps, my downfall. Maybe this is the kickstart I need.

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greeneyedlulu · 26/11/2020 10:18

I could have written this post!! I've always been big but I'm at my heaviest right now. I started doing noom which was working during the first lockdown but then my mum died in June and I really lost my way with everything, couldn't concentrate, no energy, what little I had went on the kids and basic housekeeping and propping up dad. I was excited to be doing noom and was trying, even started doing yoga when I could and I lost about 10lbs and then I couldn't get past the 16 stone barrier and I just bounced about on the same few pounds then when mum died I gave up. Right now I feel huge, I look pregnant, I'm puffed out going up the stairs, I've lost my neck under all my chins. And despite knowing that I need to lose weight and get healthier, that button in me just hasn't clicked, I have no energy, I feel sad, i dont know if its lockdown, grief the start of menopause but I'm really struggling. I've put most of the weight that I lost with noom back on so currently 16 stone 8lbs. I just feel crappy.

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Backbee · 26/11/2020 10:23

You're definitely not alone OP! Small steps sound good, and it's surprising I find how quickly you can feel more positive about yourself even with no change in weight but with walking more and making better food choices. I love carbs so limit myself to one carb meal a day, it helps to have something otherwise I find I end up binging!

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DontCryForMeNextdoorNeighbour · 26/11/2020 10:23

Same here OP. As PP say, please be kind to yourself.
We just need to make some changes to get back on track.

I've recently realised I need to make changes - so I've now committed to at least 20 mins moderate exercise per day (eg brisk walking - outside or following a walking class on youtube; or using my stationary bike); using my weights as often as I can; and doing something for flexibility/balance eg yoga or tai chi on youtube.

Also, I have got some healthier snacks to help me cut down on crisps - rice crackers, mushroom pate, crispbreads, vegan sandwich slices, dips made with vegan Greek yogurt, homemade baba ganoush, having lots of veg & fruit on hand, drinking enough water etc (and I make a lovely healthy snack which is just chickpea flour, grated veg, seasonings, water, fried with Frylight into tasty little fritters).
Good luck OP - you are definitely not alone!

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SingToTheSky · 26/11/2020 10:30

I’m struggling too. Finding there’s not much to enjoy at the moment (don’t even want to get out of bed most days) so chocolate/cake etc is about the only thing to look forward to Hmm it’s a tough rut to get out of, I just hope that when lockdown ends we get a bit of routine back like the gym etc

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thenightsky · 26/11/2020 10:30

Fluffycloudland77 I've just looked at your Melatonin suggestion with hope in my heart, but they don't ship to the UK because its banned here Sad

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Nanalisa60 · 26/11/2020 10:30

Well you are not alone, this is the fattest I have ever been, I always usually lose weight in October and November because of all the Christmas party’s and balls I usually go to so want to look good!! This year I have just not stopped eating !! I hate myself I’m living in jimjams, leggings and sport cloths, I can not get in any of my nice cloths, and forget about my posh dresses, I must be up two sizes.

I have decided just to give up for this year and January 4th that’s it on a hard three months diet.

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Cheeseandwin5 · 26/11/2020 10:33

@Jumpingjosephene21

I am so sorry you feel like that, but if it helps I think there are alot of people in your boat.
For my part I need to lose atleast 10 kilos to qualify as Fat!!!
I do a bit of exercise, but my eating habits are a disgrace, with a cup of tea and biscuits my staple routine at night.
I know I should do more but just don't seem to have the will power to do it.
Maybe next summer.....

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Coldwinterahead1 · 26/11/2020 10:35

I've done 16:8 and low carb and it's the only thing that's helped but I will need to be super strict in January. We need a diet thread for lockdown lardarses

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Pebbledashery · 26/11/2020 10:36

Sign up to les Mills on demand. Its brilliant. I work out 6 days a week now.. From zero. Once you start exercising its easy to address food because I find I don't want to ruin my hard work. I'm down 12lbs since I started 3 weeks ago. I do it first thing in the morning before work after I've done nursery drop off. I felt exactly the same as you as I was binging on crap food and sitting on my backside all day. Now my body aches.. But a good ache and best of all I enjoy exercising. I definitely recommend it.

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Woodifer · 26/11/2020 10:44

start by changing one small thing - what's the easiest to change? no biscuits? set nights the week to drink/ not drink?

just pick one

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mummytippy · 26/11/2020 10:45

Start a thread and post the link @Coldwinterahead1 Grin

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Earslaps · 26/11/2020 10:51

Make little changes day by day and it's much easier to keep at it. So many people go 'on a diet' or try to cut out certain foods and can't stick to it so the binge/shame cycle continues. Mostly, be kind to yourself, these are unprecedented times and lots of people are going into hibernation mode.

Make sure you exercise at least a little every day- it's good for your mood (only thing that keeps anxiety at bay for me), gives you more energy, keeps our bodies healthy. If you're unfit then start with walking, then walk a bit faster, maybe try some resistance training, exercise DVDs. Find something that you enjoy (or fake it till you make it!) and you'll stick with it. Maybe meet a friend for a power walk, if you make a date of it you're more likely to go.

Focus on adding more good food to your diet- add an extra potion of veg to each meal, try to aim for as much colour as possible. Add in plenty of beans and lentils, lean protein. When you have got plenty of good food in you you will reduce the amount of crap you crave! Don't look as food as 'good' or 'bad'- there's room for chocolate or crisps as long as you are eating well most of the time and exercising.

Little changes are what cause most people to pile on the pounds, and little changes can help to reverse that. Don't worry about what your weight is, just try and focus on introducing positive changes that make you feel happier and healthier.

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RainingBatsAndFrogs · 26/11/2020 10:52

I sympathise OP, and I was you by June last year, not all lockdown induced, but lockdown on top of creeping sloth and snacking.

Work out what works for you.

I wanted to adjust my diet to a sustainable ongoing habit. I stopped buying snacks, biscuits etc. Adjusted my food portions and chose lower calorie meals. But not ‘diet’ meals if any kind.

I also started exercise. Even a bit made me feel so much better about myself. A brisk walk counts.

Once you have made an investment in yourself it is easier to see the effort as giving yourself something rather than taking something away.

I have lost 12Kg since the beginning of June, and it hasn’t been tough, once I kickstarted myself.

Also the ‘no point til after NY’ is a fallacy. Getting fitter and leaner is a long game. I have had some real ‘OMG, did I really just eat a 4 pack of Twirl Bars?’ Days, but in the old days that would have been on top of other stuff. Now it simply represents a standstill for a day. I will no doubt eat loads over Christmas, but so what, so will millions of people who manage to maintain whatever weight feels good for them overall.

You don’t have to aim for perfect, either. Modest achievements can make a big difference.

Good luck, OP!

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schnubbins · 26/11/2020 11:14

I was sorting stuff last week and found my medical records for my two pregnancies over 20 years ago.I now way the same as I did at the END of my pregnancy over 20 years ago! So I have set my self a goal to do the best I can over the next 20 days .I prefer to see results quickly so I am doing 16;8 Fasting and only eating protein in the form of fish and eggs , no dairy because cheese is my absolute downfall and no carbs No alcohol either as that has also got way out of hand.When I look in the fridge now I can't eat much as its going against the rules I made for myself so there is less temptation .Im already 2kgs down in one week and I'm going to stick to it so that I can enjoy Christmas somewhat.

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