Actually disgusted with myself

[Jumpingjosephene21]

I'm so disgusted with how fat I've let myself get during lockdown. I drink too much, I'm sat at a desk all day and I eat crap. I've always struggled with my weight but before lockdown I would walk, exercise and eat OKish. Now I just seem to have lost all self control and routine. And it shows. I've put on at least two stone in lockdown. My face is bloated and my belly is massive.

I don't know why I'm posting. I just need a kick up the arse to change my habits. I'm stuck in a big rut. Can anyone help? On an average day I eat a lot of bread and carbs. I snack on junk like crisps and biscuits and I drink maybe 3-4 nights a week which is also empty calories.

[malificent7]

Intermittent fasting is the bomb and helped me loose a stone.
Plus workouts in living room.
This year food has been acomfort to many...cut yourself some slack.

[oopsiedaisy2]

It's all in the mind. I've always been overweight and suffered with stomach problems, recently my stomach got so much worse and the doctor basically told me I have to lose weight so I have been using MFP to track my calories, it doesn't feel laborious but I'm accountable for everything I eat and feel much more in control. I've lost 6Ib so far in a month which isn't loads but it's coming off . You just need to take it one day at a time and don't deprive yourself . All in moderation . Good luck.

[PurpleFlower1983]

I’m the same OP, you’re not alone!!

[malificent7]

Soup is great this time of year.

[crikeycrumbsblimey]

@FatGirlShrinking has a similar technique to me.

At start of lockdown I was ill mentally and physically (stress of what physically wrong with me meaning COVID v dangerous) and My eating got worse and worse, no time to exercise round kids, work, housework, washing etc. Plus I’d been putting weight on for a while.

1 August I just thought duck it went for a run and started calorie counting (my fitness) to retrain my brain into how much I should eat. Portions, food types etc. I’m not restricting calories too much as it has to be sustainable in the long run but try to be less than 1600 after exercise.

But before anything get out and walk, walking is amazing for you. Podcasts books music or just nothing and walk but make it about you and looking after you. You need to believe you are worth it again

[FusionChefGeoff]

I think exercise will make the biggest and quickest difference to your mental perspective.

Again, start small.

DH was in a very similar position to you so he started going on a 15 minute walk every lunchtime no matter weather and, if he missed it, he went after work. Slowly he built that up. It's not a gentle stroll - a real power walk.

He uses some kind of app (maybe linked to his Garmin watch?) that tracks steps and is now up to at least 10,000 steps every day and is on a streak which he is very stubborn he's not going to lose!!! So sometimes he's going out at 8.30 / 9.00 at night. But he sticks an audio book on, wraps up and off he goes every single night.

Are there any shops in (decent) walking distance?? We've got a retail park about a mile away so I often suggest he pops in to get x, y, S whilst he's on his walk to give extra motivation / satisfaction!

Once you start getting our every day you'll feel soooo much better.

Then, when you think that habit has set, start looking at food.

[par05]

Hi I was the same boat, my thing was I thought of food way to much, and wouldnt stop until I felt proper stuffed! I saw a add for exante meal replacement researched it and thought ok I'll go for it, as nothing I did seemed to shift my weight. I don't have to think about food with this, and in the first 2 weeks I had lost 11lbs. I now have been on it with a few cheat days and have lost total of 15lbs in 4 weeks. It has given me a kickstart that I really needed and I have managed to stick to it.

[PolarnOPirate]

Omg this is so depressing, I do everything recommended here and still bloody 16 stone. How much do you weigh OP? These threads the OP always weighs like 12 stone 😂 aaaaagh it is shit to feel so bad about yourself though, no matter the figures. I am seeing a dietician and she recommended mantras which I am finding helpful. A happier mood/outlook will hopefully help you eat better (I already eat well so mine are about body acceptance and anxiety). Also seeing the doc for mood meds next week, fingers crossed, that’s an idea if you feel it necessary! Also exercise bike is a super convenient way to get 30 mins exercise in

[Nonameslob]

I'm in the same boat OP, decided to just make a few small changes and stick to them forever. Then when the weight stops coming off I make another small change. This is the first time I've ever kept the weight off. I started with dropping from 2 sugars to 1 in my coffee and dropped carbs from 3 meals a week. My biggest weakness is crisps and as I can't stop at one packet I decided I would go cold turkey on that and stopped buying them. Now I can't face them, the salt makes me feel sick. The weight is coming off very slowly but it's staying off and I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything. My next step is to go to no sugar in coffee. I'm also struggling for healthy snacks for that bit between lunch and dinner if anyone has any ideas. I'm sick of bananas!

[Thecobwebsarewinning]

One thing that helped me this lockdown was a new craft type hobby. It keeps me concentrated for a couple of hours a day and stops me wandering off to the kitchen and boredom eating. Even when I’m not doing it I’m as likely to drift upstairs to my craft table and cast a fresh look on my recent attempts as I am to drift over to the fridge and open yet another cider. The downside is that I keep buying new colours/equipment/books associated with it!

I also try to maintain 10000 steps a day. Admittedly I do these indoors in front of a cheesy TV movie and I’m a Celeb, not outside in the fresh air as recommended by all the experts. But walking outside past the same old houses breathing in exhaust fumes is boring and unpleasant even without the cold and damp, whilst walking inside watching tv with a cup of tea within reach is bearable. I adopt a power walk stance and engage my abs and pump my arms so my heart rate elevates and my fitness tracker recognises it as exercise and that’s good enough for me. I’ve reached a point now where if there is something good on tv I prefer to watch it while I walk as it improves my concentration I’m not distracted by my phone or iPad and the steps mount up without my noticing.

Above all, as other people have said, be kind to yourself. Don’t use abusive words to describe yourself. The world is in a truly shit place right now and we are all muddling through as best we can. Let’s all pray for a quick, successful roll out of the vaccine and an end to this by Spring.

[OverTheRainbow88]

just need a kick up the arse to change my habits. I'm stuck in a big rut. Can anyone help? On an average day I eat a lot of bread and carbs. I snack on junk like crisps and biscuits and I drink maybe 3-4 nights a week which is also empty calories.


Allow yourself 2 slices of bread for one meal
A day
Try and only drink alcohol fri and day eve and not excessive amount
Try and meal plan and do a weekly shop
Buy yourself one small snack treat a day- like a Fredo or something similar in size
Try and fit in a 30min power walk a day

[fridascruffs]

Michael Mosley's Clever Guts book is really useful for understanding cravings which might help you master them. Also the Virtual Gastric Band hypnosis app makes you not want to eat rubbish (lots of people dont bother with the gastric band bit, just the healthy eating bit.) Good luck.

[Sunshineandflipflops]

Another in a similar boat.

Rather than try too much at one, can you do a daily walk? The weather is (mostly) lovely at this time of year and getting on a good pair of shoes and a warm coat and walking for 30 mins not only helps physically but mentally too. I run 3 times a week but on the days I don't, I try and get out for a walk of some sort and then a long walk at the weekend.

I need to stop the mid week wine but as a single parent and with the dark evenings it has become a bit of a comfort blanket.

[EvelynSalt]

I'm right there with you OP! Lockdown has been tough. In the first I was paranoid about gaining weight so for the first time in my life, exercised every day (dance workouts on YouTube - lots of fun) and ate "clean" food. Great results. Then lockdown ended, I started going for cake and coffee again, gained it all (10kg!) back and have felt total rage at myself and lost all motivation.

What has helped me is to find alternative foods that I really like. So instead of crisps, I've bought a bulk pack of Cheesies (literally just crispy baked cheese with nothing added - so tasty!). I've stocked up on Ember biltong for another salty snack as it's got no added sugar. I've replaced my milk chocolate with very dark chocolate. Rather than ordering Papa John's each weekend, I've bought frozen pizza dough (Northern Dough Co) to be able to quickly make my own which is much thinner and minus all the grease. Rather than a sausage butty on crusty bread at the weekend, it's a sausage butty with wholewheat pita bread.

On top of the healthier alternatives, I'm doing 16:8. I'm using an app called BodyFast but I think there are several - it's put me on a programme with various fasts each day and I'm finding it very manageable. 1kg has dropped off already.

Marginal gains OP, one day at a time - you can absolutely do it!

[Jumpingjosephene21]

Wow thank you all. I've just woken up and read all of these replies, I wasn't expecting such a response. You have all been so helpful and supportive.

I will definitely cut back on the drinking. As a pp said, 3-4 alcohol free days probably isn't enough when I calculate how much I am drinking when I allow myself. And then of course the following day I just crave crap to keep a hangover at bay.

I've always over eaten. I crave that feeling of being full, almost too full sometimes. That combined with the calories from booze is not good. I have this sort of 'treat' mentality. Like we always have a takeaway and a bottle of wine at the weekend because it's a treat. But slowly these treat nights have been edging into the week and becoming more regular because there's simply nothing else to look forward to.

I have been trying to do lunchtime walks and I do an online fitness class once a week already but I will try and gradually increase this. I've been suffering quite badly with anxiety and just started taking medication in the last month so that's zapped a lot of my motivation too.

I really appreciate all the advice I have taken a lot on board.

[AtlasPine]

I’m more of an all or nothing person so started by fasting totally three days a week and stopping most carbs. Dramatic action so dramatic weight loss. It was triggered by getting a pre-diabetic sugar reading at a routine blood test. It scared me so much.

Then when I dropped 4 stone I focused on how to keep it off or lose a bit more but more gradually.

There is more support in favour of losing quickly to kick start it as long as you work on maintaining it. It’s more motivating - I got a Fitbit to track my loss which felt good. And I agree with the poster who is marching on the spot in her living room, especially in the winter. If I have weak times I just think do a couple of thousand steps and see if you still want the biscuit or whatever.

Not having carby or sugary stuff in the house helps and I also do an online shop which I edit the hell out of just before cut off time. Did I really need this or that? Probably not.
The best thing is I fly up the stairs now and feel great. I’m so much happier and healthier - more energy, zest for life. I sleep better and have stopped waking myself with a big snore. I fit clothes which aren’t from specialist big woman shops like Yours. Doing it was tough but so worth it. My blood sugar has gone back to normal too.

Please allow yourself to do the best thing you can for you. You really need to believe you deserve it. I bet you would go to the ends of the world for those you love, any hard work for them if it saved their life. So do it for you. Treat yourself to health, even if it is hard hard work.

[Arthersleep]

I did the same during lockdown! I've now set myself a lose a stone by Xmas. The hardest part was motivating myself to start. I bought a new skirt that I can't fit into at the mo and have hung it on the wardrobe door as a reminder. I've made a chart to record my weight loss which I do daily. I haven't really cut anything out (still eating chocolate etc) but have upped my veg and protein. As a result the carbs cravings have diminished. Two and a half weeks in and I have lost 5lbs. Don't see it as a diet and of going without. See it as a way to put more in. Challenge yourself to eat more fruit and veg (just a salad once a day with a meal) and put in extra protein. I have a second breakfast at ten am of scrambled eggs and smoked salmon. I have also made batches of red pepper and lentil soup to eat throughout the day when I'm hungry. Starting is by far the hardest part. Treat yourself to something nice, feel good about yourself and set yourself some small realistic targets.

[CatsOnMySocks2]

I felt exactly like this after the first lockdown. I was furloughed and eating crap everyday, while feeling my clothes get tighter and tighter. I put my head in the sand. So I was horrified to weigh myself in July and see I was almost 11 stone and firmly in the overweight BMI category.

I could not weigh 11 stone at 5'3. So I started intermittent fasting and being more mindful about calories. I don't eat anywhere near as much chocolate, crisps, cake etc now. Before it was almost daily, now it's once in a while, small portion, as a treat.

I haven't done loads of exercise, I take a walk when I can but it's hard for me to find the time to do more than this due to my job and finding the time - especially now it's so dark in the evenings.

I have lost 2 stone in four months by doing this though, and I feel a lot better now. Maybe it's something you could consider?

[StealthPolarBear]

Me too only mine is three stone and I drink every night :( in the last couple of weeks I've started to make the effort and the weight is starting to come off slowly.
What works for me is logging my food (yesterday was a bad day), my fitness pal is good but at the moment I have the fitbit app. Also 'treating' myself, for me posh but relatively low cal ready meals work best. Eg tesco wicked range.

[StealthPolarBear]

But I literally cannot get out of bed in the morning to exercise. Doesn't help that the days are so busy and I'm usually working late into the evening.

[ScrapThatThen]

I'm trying to remember that eating is enjoyable but overeating and undereating are really not.

[ByeByeMissAmericanPie]

I’ve worked out that I do better if I’m actually accountable for my exercise, so I pay upfront for 2 live Zumba classes a week. The one I do at 6.30 one evening is brilliant as I really don’t feel very hungry after that.

I also try and walk with a friend once or twice a week, which means you get the steps in, without thinking about it.

Left to my own devices, I’d be a slug.

I once read on here that if we all ate ‘10 a Day’ instead of our recommended 5, we’d lose weight, so I always try and exceed 5 every day, and keep fruit to a minimum.

But I really really struggle with my weight and could lose a stone or two...so am by no means perfect.

[Higgeldypiggeldy35]

I'm in the same boat and I can't even diet or exercise much because I'm 6 months pregnant. We've had far more crap in our diet this year and I don't even know how much weight I've put on because I'm too scared to weigh myself. And it's not pregnancy related mostly it's greed and boredom. I can easily eat a whole packet of biscuits or a whole pack of mince pies! I'd love to be able to buy will power

[Joswis]

Oh I know how you feel! I was fat before, but now, eating is a hobby. I find it hard to sit and NOT eat something. I am the fattest I have been for about 20 years.

I really need to find something different to do with my hands. Sew or knit maybe. So, fat slob or old granny. What a choice!

[pumpkinpie01]

I know what you mean op , I weigh the same as when I was 9 months pregnant 😫 I'm using the lose it app and find it simple and effective and it definitely works . Also Rebecca Louise on you tube , lots of 10 minute exercise routines that aren't so hard you can't do them but hard enough that you can feel it working .