Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

To expect a childminder not to break the law

87 replies

Reallytired · 13/09/2007 17:47

My son who is 5 years old and 111cm high told me that the childminder made him sit in the front seat of a car with just an adult seat belt. I believe him because I don't think he has any reason to lie. He has no idea what the law is on children and car seats.

I am furious because we always use a booster seat when my son goes in a car. The law states that children who are under the age of 12 and under 139cm tall should use a suitable child restraint.

My gut feeling is that my son is not going to that childminder again.

Do you think that I have grounds for a formal complaint to OFSTED?

OP posts:

morocco · 14/09/2007 14:46

at least he told you
the other week i saw a ?childminder? definitely not the mother anyway, put 2 kids in the car ignoring the car seats and not even bothering with the seat belts then drive off with the younger one in the front seat as well
i reported it to the club they were being collected from but they said there was nothing they could do
i would go ballistic if i found out someone was doing that with y kids

fireflyfairy2 · 14/09/2007 14:59

Did you speak to your childminder today?

smeeinit · 14/09/2007 15:51

i cant believe the amount of cms who have posted on here and not advised the op to chat to her cm first before doing anything
i would be totally devestated if my mindees parents didnt feel comfortable enough to talk to me about it before taking the word of a 5 year old.(thats not meant to be derogatory to your ds reallytired)
and would frankly be extremely peed off if the parent made a complaint before talking to me.
talk to your cm before doing anything else.

madamez · 14/09/2007 16:42

Well one reason why you might see people not using a child seat is if they have a child bewteen about 12 months and about 3 years and they are car-free but have had, unexpectedly, to make a car journey. THere is NO SUCH THING as a car seat for that age of child that is small enough and light enough to lug around with you on the off chance that you might have to travel in a car (which is why the law does actually make exemptions for one-off short journeys.

This is probably not entirely relevant to the OP but its something that doesn't seem to occur to car owners.

mixedmama · 14/09/2007 17:00

I had thought tho that under 3 years there was no expemtion, the unexpected exemptions only apply to over 3 year olds (or the equivalant height). I have saved the PDF as I needed this info some time ago. Will just check to make sure i am not making it up

mixedmama · 14/09/2007 17:03

Just had a quick read...

Under 3
They can travel unrestrained only in the rear of a taxi.

Over 3
Child can travel in the rear but not the front restrained with an adult seatbelt

in a taxi
for a short distance in unexpected circumstances
where two occupied child seats in the rear prevent the fitment of a third.

NAB3 · 14/09/2007 17:20

There should never be a case where it is okay not to use a seat. Accidents do happen. What makes the fact that it is an emergency make it less likely to have an accident? It would have to be life or death for my child to go anywhere without a seat and even then I wouldn't be happy.

mixedmama · 14/09/2007 17:22

Completely agree. people are always trying to coax me into not using the seat as it would be inconvenient, but i just cant do it. Always think what if we did have an accident and he wasnt in his seat, would always blame myself for anything that might happen.

moondog · 14/09/2007 20:24

Thank you Hula and Gess for confirming what I thought (ie my lot are arses).They have agrs wit-h chaueed to 'review their policy' peand supply rones asap.

What staggers me is that in schools,there is someone permanently on the palyground with a first aid kit and walkie talkie (woe betide if anyone should stumble) yet they think it is ok for a tiny language disordered 4 year old to travel 17 miles in a car with someone he has never met with no booster.

Unbloodybelievable.

gess · 14/09/2007 21:15

It's bizarre. We had a very stern letter at the end of last academic year about the new law regarding booster seats & heights and how any child not in possession of a booster seat would be refused entry onto the bus etc etc.

Am sorting out filing at the moment. Can send it to you if its any help..... (when I find it )

moondog · 14/09/2007 21:19

Ooh smashing.
If you can.
Am meeting head honcho on Wednesday.
Look out,here comes middle class mother from hell.

lololola · 14/09/2007 21:19

hi reallytired, really sorry you have had this happen to you. i am a registered c/m and child safety is my number one priority. but i think you should talk to her first, because if you do complain to ofsted they may ask you what her explanation was?

Original poster

Reallytired · 14/09/2007 21:24

I can usually tell when my son is lying. His body language generally gives him away. He likes the childminder and her son and I see no reason why he would lie. He had no idea that it is wrong for a child to ride in a car without a car seat.

I have left messages on the cm answerphone and not had a reply. I am seriously worried. I agree that it is unfair to just take the word of a five year old, but adults can lie as well.

I think it would be wrong to ignore a 5 year old telling you that he travelled in a car without a car seat. Frankly I would rather give my five year old son the benefit of the doult than risk him being killed in a car accident.

OP posts:

lololola · 14/09/2007 21:30

i agree.

MaureenMLove · 14/09/2007 21:46

Did you leave messages about the car seat or just that you needed to speak to her?

smeeinit · 15/09/2007 10:01

reallytired, nobody has suggested that you ignore what your ds is telling you and nobody is suggesting he is lying to you,what has been suggested is that you talk to your cm first,which you obviously have been trying to do.
you have asked for advice on this matter and you have been given it even if some of it is not want you want to hear.
if you really dont trust your cm then you should take your son out and find a new one.
personally i make sure all my mindees parents are 100% happy with me and me with them before signing contracts,so nothing like this would ever occur.if you think for even one second that your cm would lie to you then i do question why the hell you put your ds with her in the first place?
i hope you get it sorted out.

cat64 · 15/09/2007 22:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

kidsrus · 15/09/2007 22:30

please talk to your c/m even if you only give her a booster seat and mention your d/s said she hasn't enough for all the children.
I would also ask if you rd/s sits in the front then can she make sure the seat is as far back as it will go so if a air bag is fitted it will do less damage in an accident.
You might find she will confess she has had a couple of occasions when she has been short of seats and as your d/s was the eldest she had to sit him in the front which is legal in an one off situation.
That way there is no excuse as that is your d/s booster also make sure your d/s always shouts if the car starts to move and hasn't got his belt on or booster seat(mine does).

madamez · 16/09/2007 10:36

NAB3 so, people are expected to conjure car seats up out of thin air? There are occasions when you have to travel in a car but do not posess a car seat. Car accidents do happen, sure (and in some car accidents a car seat will be no help at all and might even be a hindrance - say the car plunges into a river and you have to unstrap the child from the seat before it sinks. Etc.) There's an element of risk in everything we do, after all.

2hot2cook · 16/09/2007 10:47

thats true, apparently something like 80% of child seats arnt fitted properly. i was a c/m once and never used my car for this reason. id rather walk (safer)

NAB3 · 16/09/2007 16:01

madamez - you are talking rubbish. Let's all give up on car seats in case we fall in a river. How many people hide behind the "in an emergency journey" so they can use a car but not bother with a seat? I am sure you strap yourself in, why not your child. No seat, no journey. End of.

madamez · 16/09/2007 21:31

NAB3: I am car free. My issue is that there may well be occasions when there is no other option but to travel in a car with DS. While I have a booster seat for him which I will take if I know that a car journey is going to be involved (like yesterday, going on the train to an event, I knew we'd be getting a taxi from the station). But even a booster seat is a heavy, bulky object to carry around just on the offchance that an emergency car journey might occur. I don't object to car seat use (why would I), what annoys me is the way so many people assume that everyone has a car. (and the fact that the car free are legally obliged to buy an expensive item that they won't get much use out of).

kidsrus · 16/09/2007 22:24

madamez i don't think that is the case.
i think you don't have to have a booster in a taxi if there isn't one available, you can also get lightweight folding ones not sure where to buy them though.

Original poster

Reallytired · 16/09/2007 23:39

I have spoken to the childminder in question. I am not reporting her to OFSTED. However I am planning to remove my son from her care. For the simple reason it appears that my son is not happy there. I will either pay her off or give her the four weeks notice.

It is hard to know what to think. My gut feeling is that my son is not lying.

Her own son is eight years old and it would make more sense if he was put in the front. She even admits herself that my son was placed in the front.

OP posts:

kidsrus · 17/09/2007 00:03

if she has admitted it then he is not lying.
what was her reason ffffffor your ds in front rather than hers?
has your ds said he is unhappy or has the childminder mentioned it?

Flip

1 2 3 4

Swipe left for the next trending thread