AIBU to drop out the day before exchange of contracts?

[Ginandtonics]

House purchase going on for so long we are starting to feel that with prices appearing to fall round here we are paying too much. We just discovered there's very likely to be a lot of nearby building work close by (which didn't show up on the searches) which will create dust and involve the loss of a lot of nearby trees. The house is expensive and maybe not 100% right in many respects but we do like it, although perhaps have some reservations about the area. Afraid we may be making a mistake, in normal circumstances we could just move again in a year or two if we weren't happy but in the current situation, which is increasingly looking like there'll be a significant economic downturn, that might not be so easy. It was advertized as chain free, and we aren't selling until after we move so not a long chain but still feel very uncomfortable dropping out last minute. We are due to exchange in a couple of days time, AIBU walking away?

[Tistheseason17]

If you're not happy, YANBU to stop.

[misspiggy19]

Don't buy a house you don't want because you don't want to be rude.

You haven't committed to buying it, anything can happen between offer and exchange.

^This.

[Ozziewozzie]

I’ve worked in property and I know just how much money a house is worth. It’s one of the biggest transactions we ever make. Don’t do it if you’re unsure. You wouldn’t buy a dress if you weren’t sure or if you did, you’d take it back to the shop. You can’t take a house back with your receipt, saying, ‘ I’ve changed my mind’
Pull out. Find somewhere you can see as your home.
Don’t feel bad. The other party will be upset, but the agent will help and support them

[RoseLillian]

YABU, utterly selfish behaviour.

[FelicisNox]

I'm selling my house and this conversation makes me feel sick.

From what you've posted you've had plenty of time to think this through but you've changed your mind and you're looking to feel better about it.

It's a no from me.

[Lifecraft]

@Lifecraft no we didn't "allow" ourselves to be strung along. We accepted an offer in good faith. The "buyer" told us he would pay the deposit and he did. He told us that we could strip out all of the fittings as he'd be remodelling... which we did... in good faith and then he fucked us over. We have been left paying 2 mortgages now for 6 months so yeah sorry we didn't make provision for that. You sound lime someone who'd gladly fuck someone over and feel no remorse. .. like my "buyer"

Indeed I would. If, for any reason, I changed my mind before contracts were signed, I'd pull out, both as a seller or a buyer.

But also, I'm always aware that I could get fucked over by my seller/buyer. That's the way it goes. I don't take it personally, it's just business. Everybody is out for themselves in house buying and selling. People need to understand that at the outset.

[Myimaginarycathasfleas]

It's now "a couple of days" since you posted your AIBU, OP. What did you decide?

[Alpal1]

Sounds like you are panicking. Are you sure it’s really the house? Could be just fear because it’s just a big step? It’s always a risk buying property but a bit of building work nearby doesn’t sound too major.

[SadlyMissTaken]

I pulled out of a flat purchase not long before exchange after deciding i didn't trust the sellers. It was probably the best financial decision i have ever made as I found an absolute bargain flat the same day which I bought and still live in.

[icedgem85]

That's a really low down shitty thing to do. I don't know how people live with themselves doing things like this! Nasty selfish people saying put yourself first. It's too late in the day to pull out, it should absolutely be illegal. It isn't legally wrong, but it sure is morally wrong.

[stayathomer]

I know people are saying yabu but if you have ANY ANY ANY doubts, you have yo look after yourselves. This is such a huge commitment and something that can potentially be hell to get away from ( from a never ever wanted to be a landlord, landlord). You sound like you want to pull out so don't try and justify it if you do. And yes, awful for the vendor but has to be done

[SadlyMissTaken]

No it isn't. I found out my sellers were planning to screw me over. They would have still been my freeholders after the sale. No thanks. Thank goodness the system allowed me to withdraw or I would have been in serious trouble. I would have had to sue my lawyers.

[SadlyMissTaken]

Sorry i meant no it isn't always a shitty thing to do.

[Guavaf1sh]

YABU- and selfish

[Eva2020]

Buyers remorse pretty normal with house purchases. But you should feel positive. If you and SO feel same l suggest you call your lawyer and ask for advice.

[Liketoshop]

I was on the receiving end of this several years ago, I'd spent £1000 on valuation and mortgage fees and searches, sold my house and the seller had cold feet. I was devastated as I couldn't afford to lose that kind of money. Its hard either way

[gingersausage]

All the people saying it’s shitty and low and mean and cruel and morally corrupt and you don’t know how they live with themselves...you do realise it’s a BUSINESS TRANSACTION right? It’s not personal. People don’t pull out of sales just to piss you off and upset you.

It’s a huge decision for the buyer and it’s not like it’s not going to cost them anything in either money or sleepless nights. And I’m sorry, but I don’t believe that most of you would hesitate for one second to fuck up a buyer’s life if another buyer came along and offered you more money.

[Custardee]

Thank goodness the Scottish system stops people acting like this, how awful

[Giraffey1]

I entirely get that you might have doubts. And you can’t pull out of a transaction just because you don’t want to upset the vendors. But to pull out the day before? Surely if you’ve been having doubts you could have changed your mind ages ago?
What did you do in the end, OP?

[chrisie16]

Why haven't you checked the Planning Office at your local Council? They'll have plans for all the building s/developments in your area, and it's free! I think YABU at this late stage. As you say, you can always move again.

[FiddlesticksAkimbo]

YADNBU

[Cheddarcheeseandsodabread]

We sold our house STC in April this year. There were problems and delays due to the property we were buying being held up in probate. As soon as probate had been granted, we pushed for a completion date. My OH in his wisdom was so fed up he gave the solicitors a 'final day' for completion (bear in mind this was our dream property, and in a location where properties don't come up very often - and we didn't want to lose it). At last, everyone was in agreement (there was a chain below us) and it was decided we would exchange & complete on the same day.

There followed a few days of frantic packing, cleaning, etc. THEN, the day before we were due to move, our buyers, buyer dropped out - just like that!

I know they were within their rights to do so, as they had not signed the contract, but seriously (!) we were devastated. Half our old furniture had gone to the tip, even our oven had gone as it was very old, and everything else was in boxes.

We had no choice but to put it straight back on the market, and luckily it sold again within a week to a 1st-time buyer, and we completed on 20th Sept - we have been in our new home for a week now and LOVE IT.

We did not know the reason the other buyer in the chain dropped out - and luckily, we sold again quickly.

We have moved into a quiet area, and this week there have been several building jobs going on, all with noise (obvs) but we are just glad to be in our new home. As a previous post said, the bank will not lend more than the property is worth, and also, if house prices go down, they go down everywhere generally.

Sorry, this was much longer than planned!

[BarbaraStrozzi]

YANBU. It's a huge sum of money - you have to be certain.

For all those saying "but other people will have lost search fees and legal fees", that's the sunk costs fallacy (in fact worse, it's the "other people's sunk costs fallacy).

My house sale fell through last week. Am I pissed off and upset? Yes, of course. Do I think my now-not-buyers were unreasonable? No. I understand their decision making process and financial interests are different from mine. (I also know the stats - more than half of house sales fall through between offer and exchange - it just is an inherently risky financial undertaking).

[Ginandtonics]

chrisie16, yes we did a search and have just checked planning again, the new application went in after our initial search was completed which is why we did it again to make sure we hadn't missed something, and it is new information. Anyone spending this amount of money has to do due dilligence right up to the last minute as part of the deal. The work will be substantial, lengthy and we think it's highly likely to be approved, and will make it harder to sell in future (not that I want to move, it's a lovely place). Thanks for all the comments everyone, it's all helpful.

[Ginandtonics]

Oddly, after all the lockdown in a flat without a garden I did ask myself if we did the right thing not moving to a bigger house with outside space and can truthfully say it would have been OK if we had moved but really not disappointed we stayed put. Now my son wants to buy his first house I'm pleased we have the spare cash to help him out.