To ask how to wean DH off antibacterial wipes

[jamoncrumpets]

DH generally loads the dishwasher most nights and gives the kitchen a quick wipe around afterwards. I do the deeper cleaning, sink scrubbing etc as and when I can.

If he's away or busy or watching tv or whatever and I clean up I clear all the surfaces as much as I can, spray with Method and wipe over with warm damp microfibre cloth, which I then drape over mixer tap to dry. I wash the cloths about once every 3-4 days.

DH claims this is 'spreading dirt' and insists on single use antibacterial wipes being used. He will not do any cleaning at all unless it's with his beloved Flash wipes and makes disgusted faces at me using my Method spray and cloth.

I've tried explaining about the environmental aspects but he says that's not what's more important, what's more important is not 'spreading around the germs'.

He isn't OCD in any way whatsoever, if anything he's more careless with his personal hygiene than I am, and he doesn't pick up after himself. So don't suggest OCD.

How can I convince him that my method is better, from a financial and environmental standpoint?

I saw somewhere a suggestion to put your dishcloth in the dishwasher each evening. Clean cloth every morning!
It works really well - when I remember to do it!

Zoflora is antibacterial though, right? And from what I can gather pretty nasty stuff for the environment. Also smells like those plug in air fresheners which give me migraines.

I don't doubt cloths can be dirty if you don't wash them often and that's obviously not good for people with issues with their immune system but we've become far too clean as a society. Coming into contact with a wide range of bacteria is really good for you. The best thing you can do for your gut microbiome and therefore your health is to garden and get your hands in the soil and have a dog - both are increasingly linked to having good health/good weight etc. So too much cleanliness is not good. There's even a type of leukemia which can be triggered by being too clean. See here www.medscape.com/viewarticle/897242

Has your husband seen some of the worst photos floating around the web which show lots of rubbish in the ocean, etc. I can't look at them without wanting to tackle my waste generally, regardless of where it will end up!

Just buy another pack of discloths and put them in the wash basket every night. That’s what I do. They just go in with towels/whites/bedding/whatever really so they aren’t creating a new wash as I’d be doing those ones anyway. I won’t say we never use the wipes as they definitely are handy, but no need to use them daily to clean worktops

Hahahaha oh dear. Get ready to kill me but we use the same blue cloth for the kitchen surfaces for about a month at a time.

Never got food poisoning though! Never get colds either.

How does your husband think the human race as survived this long, with wipes only being an invention of the last 10 years or so?

Shouldn't we have all be wiped (see what I did there) out by mega germs by now.

He definately has ishoos

I use a cloth a day but have loads. I let the cloth dry overnight on the mixer tap then chuck it in the wash basket. That way it’s dry and doesn’t smell In the wash basket while it’s waiting for a wash. You can get method anti bacterial spray. Smells nice.

I am willing to be educated on this, but unless my worktops look dirty I don't wipe them down at all!

I'm the only one that uses them for anything that might get germs on them and therefore know what's touched the work surface. This, realistically, is practically nothing as I use boards for any work that I do. Anything that does end up on the worktop accidentally which could cause illness (chicken juices, etc) is immediately wiped and anti-bacc'ed. I'm very paranoid about chicken particularly so tend to use kitchen towel on that and throw it away.

When I do clean them I use an anti-bac Method spray and a microfibre cloth, which gets washed regularly, just not with every single wipe. Surely if you're using anti-bac spray, then the cloth is naturally anti-bacc'ed at the same time??

As I say, willing to be educated on this, but no-one's ever been ill on my watch to date!

I've tried explaining about the environmental aspects but he says that's not what's more important, what's more important is not 'spreading around the germs'.

www.ewg.org/enviroblog/2015/09/trouble-disinfecting-wipes

www.reuters.com/article/us-infection-wipes/antibacterial-wipes-can-spread-superbugs-study-idUSL0383329520080603

These articles are old, but the principle still applies. Anti-bacterial anything kills 99% of bacteria, but allows the rest to thrive and become resistant.

The nature of single use wipes also means that they are sometimes ineffective because people don't use them appropriately. If you need to clean you need to clean, and 'disinfecting' won't take the place of cleaning. If you don't need to disinfect, then you are just pointlessly breading super bugs.

Hide the Flash wipes. Your DH has an issue with either Germs or Showing You He's Right.
People with fear of germs are usually highly exclusive about particular things. Eg. they might wash the door handles every day but own a dog and not worry about the dog licking it's arse and then their face.
They only worry about certain Germs in certain places. It's not about Germs it's about a fixation their mind has.

Your way is fine, OP. MN is full of germophobes. What do people actually think is going to happen if you change the cloth every 3 days?

The more I read MN, the more I realise why people claim to be so busy. If I hoovered every day, washed the cloth after one use, wiped the worktops after each meal, cleaned the toilet after 1 piss I'd never sit down...

3-4 days

I get cloths. Cut them up, use a bit of washing up liquid on them to clean the surfaces , then put them straight in the washing machine. No cloth gets used twice.

Ahh, differences of opinion on hygiene. My DH thinks it’s “disgusting” when I drape a teatowel over washed dishes drying in the rack, even if it’s only a day old and has only been used to dry other clean dishes.

YET.

I’ve caught him numerous times washing his shoes in the kitchen sink. He sees no problem with that.

I'm gobsmacked that so many people wash their dishcloth after every single wipe-down! That is totally excessive IMO unless your surfaces are absolutely filthy. I change mine every two weeks or so (or if it's looking visibly worn/dirty, whichever's soonest) and nobody's ever ill.

I do things your way but as well as using anti bac etc, I always hot rinsed the cloth with bleach.

I think the compromise is new cloth daily, wash say 3 days worth at once. If you think of the costs of wipes over a period, verses however many packs of wipes.

OCD is not just what you seem to think it is. However, there's a lot more to it than 1 element, and I wouldn't dream of suggesting anyone had it

We use spray and kitchen roll/cloths

I think the one doing the cleaning gets to decide how they will do it, so long as everything actually does get clean. You can do it your way and he can do it his way and not have to dictate to each other.

everytime he buys them, throw them away or hide them.
If he stops cleaning up, stop doing anything for him.

You don't get a sense of what the majority of people really do on these threads because it becomes like the bacteria olympics, with posters desperate to out do each other: "You wash your cloths once a day? Well, I wash them after every single use, etc..." Folk like me are ashamed to post about what we do/don't do for fear of being shamed so much we want to hurl ourselves out of our unwashed grubby windows.

using one cloth for days is grim.

But why, if it's covered in anti-bacterial spray? How do germs spread then?

I agree innit it explains a lot. Every time I read MN I feel like a complete skank in comparison with other posters but it does explain the busyness factor.

Why not just use spray and paper kitchen towels?

DH still uses the tip he got from "How clean is your house" many years ago which was to microwave a dish or cleaning cloth for a couple of minutes to sterilise it

Pick your battles OP. I would be more like you as I think wipes are wasteful but if someone else is cleaning (their own kitchen) I wouldn’t presume to dictate how they did it. Just because I think one way is better it doesn’t mean other adults have to agree with me. The ways and your DH prefer are different but each have their pros and cons. Insisting your DH does things your way is moving towards being controlling.