To be upset with the constant praise DP gets?

[Chocolateismyvice]

My DP is a wonderful man. He's patient, kind, hard working and caring. He's a very hands on father to our 15 month old, and helps around the house.

Everyone always raves about how fantastic he is. Most of the men in my family who are dad's are good but have always taken a step back, so in comparison, my DP is excellent.

Certain relatives keep harping on about great DP is and the sun basically shines out of his arse. He works 8.30-5.30 (home by 6). He baths DS 5 nights a week and puts him to bed, helps around the house, does drop offs to my mum a couple of days a week and has DS one day on the weekend when I'm in work.

What is grating on me though is the same people do say I'm a good mum but keep on and on about how wonderful DP and almost dismiss me and my contribution.

I work 3 days a week (7-2), I do most the 'proper' cleaning, most of the cooking, meal planning and shopping, take DS out to park/library/play group/etc. Now it works well, as I'm home more so can clean while DS is napping as I don't want to be cleaning at 9pm, we all eat as soon as DP gets in because of DS and I'm home in afternoons so do most of the cooking, DP cooks on a Saturday and alternative Sunday. I love cooking so don't mind doing most of it. I also bath DS twice a week and DP will do dishes, tidy, flick the hoover around,, etc. All in all, theres a good balance, we both chip and work as a team.

Yet, a lot of my relatives and DPs parents don't shut up about how wonderful he is and how much he does. And "DP is home soon/off the weekend so you'll get a nice break" I just feel like screaming, no I don't. I do the jobs I can't do with a very busy and active toddler, or I work at the weekend so no, I don't have a break. We both chip in around the house and with DS.

AIBU to be get annoyed at the constant praise DP receives just because he's a man whilst my efforts to be forgotten because I'm a woman/mother and it's expected?

Don't get me wrong, yes he is a lovely person and I'm lucky to have him but he's also lucky to have me (to be fair, he says it often) and we BOTH work fucking hard. I'm probably being sensitive but it's really getting to me at the moment.

[longwayoff]

If you can't cope with this please pass him over here. You are lucky to have him, yes, lucky. All too few men are like this which is why everyone finds it a bit of a surprise. You can always trade him in for one of the prize specimens frequently described here.

[SoyDora]

I despair of the fact that anyone who is married to a non arsehole is considered ‘lucky’ 🤦🏻‍♀️

[jasjas1973]

As a guy bringing up a baby, i had all this "praise" initially it was nice to have but after a while, i stopped reacting to it, just a thank you and change the subject v quickly.
Women bring up kids all the time, its not particular hard and either sex can do it.
It's a societal thing, we in the UK are very backward in what men can/should or dont do, also many women themselves see it as a female thing to bring up children.

OP if you snap back, you ll just be the bitch from hell, ignore it.

[WonderTweek]

Slightly off topic, but my husband and I went to pick up our toddler from the nursery during the “big freeze” a couple of months back, and my husband was chatting to one of the nursery workers whilst trying to get a wriggly toddler into his snow suit. He went into great detail about how he got the toddler dressed that morning and how he managed it all despite the toddler protesting (he doesn’t do the mornings very often), and the nursery nurse said “well done daddy, I think we should give you a medal!” and gave me a knowing look and a smile. It did make me laugh.

[ichifanny]

The same happens in my house and I usually correct people when they say who’s babysitting when it’s their father and when they say oooh he’s good . BUT I do appreciate I have one of the better men out there and that it will be a good role model for my children .