Luckily, however, I do like my DH! So, as my in-laws are coming for a visit tomorrow, I would like to get things off my chest here rather than risk upsetting or annoying DH (they are his parents after all even though he knows what they are like, he does not know the extent to which I dislike them.)
I find them, firstly, tediously dull. We sit and make stilted conversation about the weather etc, there is also an undercurrent of tension that someone might say something potentially controversial (by controversial, I mean basically express an opinion.)
Which brings me to my next point, they live their lives fretting. They worry about neighbours, burglars, you name it they will find something to worry about with it. They also cannot comprehend why someone would not stress about the things they fret over. DH said he was terrified of the idea of burglars when he was young, something drummed into him by his parents.
I find his mother in particular quite controlling. She acts nervous and on edge but this also means that everyone else bends over backwards to accommodate what she wants, regardless of any possible inconvenience to anyone else. She 'doesn't want to put anyone out' or 'get in the way' with pretty much everything which really means that she gets exactly what she wants as nobody wants to 'upset' her.
DH has has anxiety issues in the past which put a great strain on our relationship. His counselling uncovered that this is due to his upbringing. His parents, on the other hand, are quietly smug that they are 'a nice normal family' and clearly (through their lack of comments) feel as if they are judging me as I have come from a family of divorced parents and a less conventional upbringing than their children who were brought up in a cul de sac in the Midlands. Out of DH's brothers, three out of the four have needed psychiatric help or counselling with regards to anxiety issues. This has never been openly mentioned because nobody wants to 'upset mum and dad.'
So, tomorrow, DH and I will give out a sanitised version of things that are happening (not that there is anything especially exciting or controversial going on anyway) while I try and find multiple excuses to get out the room / house. There will be the undercurrent of tension and I will find it increasingly bizarre that, the more normal they pretend to be, the more dysfunctional they actually are.
And breathe....!
AIBU?
I don't like my in-laws, AIBU to offload here before their visit?
Scaramoose · 24/02/2018 19:02
I don't have PILs, they died before I met DH, SIL and BIL are fine, DM and my aunt, on the other hand...
My aunt's current thing is telling me when to get the DC up. I can't actually make them stay asleep.
DM once gave DS2 something to eat on the bus, he was already eating a bag of popcorn I'd brought, this caused lots of whinging from DD because she hadn't wanted to bring a snack, I didn't say anything at the time, but I brought it up later, then of course DD wanted an early lunch because her tummy was hurting, DS2 only ate about half his. She says that "her friends don't mind her doing it", well, great, but can you not get DS2 into bad habits? No fucking sugar between meals. 
That's shocking behaviour regarding your father, not even a text 
I've just had a dreaded MIL visit this weekend. The biggest issue I have with her is that she just has no interest in anyone else but herself. She talks at great length about her (frankly dull as dishwater) life and never once asks how we are or what we have been upto. If I manage to get a word in edgeways and steer the conversation away from her she just says oh and then goes back to rattling off. And she makes a mess :/ . Wont have to see her for a few months now anyway so HURRAH. I had wine before she arrived on friday which is how I cope ;)
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