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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to ask your practical tips for frequent bed wetter - 5yr old ds

73 replies

milkyman · 05/01/2018 12:08

My ds has only just come out of wearing nappies - I know.... He now frequently wets the bed as not used it. Any tips, tricks, practical ideas for dealing with it in the night? No judgement please.

OP posts:
Moomichi · 05/01/2018 12:11

Some aren't ready to do day and night in one go?
I lifted my girls onto the loo when they were potty training. Usually when we were going to bed ourselves.
Have you spoken to the doc about it? X

Whichschool2020 · 05/01/2018 12:13

Apparently night wetting is hormonal and up to a certain point you can’t do anything. I’d go back to nappies for night time for now.

SvartePetter · 05/01/2018 12:13

He is not ready, put him back in nappies. Nightwetting depends on a hormone which some kids don't have until later.

TeenTimesTwo · 05/01/2018 12:13

Keep him in night nappies.
Mine was dry in day over 2 years before dry at night.

thepatchworkcat · 05/01/2018 12:14

My 5 year old is still in nighttime pull ups. Have you done day and night all at once? Maybe he’s not ready to go through the night? My DS was dry at night for a short time in summer but it all went to pot when he was starting school due to a bit of stress I think, so we went back to the pull ups. We’ll prob try again soon. Others have told me that plenty of children aren’t dry at night until 6/7.

Sirzy · 05/01/2018 12:15

Use nappies. His body obviously isn’t ready yet

hereandnowtoday · 05/01/2018 12:16

My DS is 5.5 and still in a nappy at night, he's nowhere near ready to stop having one and still has occasional accidents during the day. We've had some good advice from the HV, who said it was hormonal and quite common (especially in boys) well beyond 5 years old.

MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 05/01/2018 12:17

As Mum to a DS who wore Pyjama Pants until he was 11yrs old I'd say start using them and chill! Smile

insancerre · 05/01/2018 12:19

Put him back in nappies
His body isn't ready yet
It's not a problem till he is 7 or 8
You can't train for night time dryness
It is done to a hormone being produced by the kidneys that tells the brain the bladder is full
It also depends on muscle development
Your child has no control over either of those things

Didiplanthis · 05/01/2018 12:23

Nearly 6 DT s still in pull ups. Tried for months as though they were ready. They weren't - I gave up !

TheIllaminati · 05/01/2018 12:23

How is his poo? Is it regular and soft? This often has an impact on nocturnal enuresis.

Also ensure he has 1-1.4ml of liquid each day (preferably water and preferably before 5-6pm).

There is a website called ERIC that is recommended by the NHS. It contains lots of useful information and tips.

HPandBaconSandwiches · 05/01/2018 12:26

Oh OP, please have a read of the ERIC website This is categorically not your sons fault. Please stop feeling ashamed as this will transfer to him. There are thousands of kids bedwetting- he’s so young! If he gets to 7 then consider seeing your GP. Why do you think there’s an aisle full of PJ pants!!

Please don’t make home feel bad. Just buy PJ pants and wait.

TheIllaminati · 05/01/2018 12:29

And the hormone thing as well, yes, but please don't exclude the possibility of trying to manage the bedwetting solely based on your son's age. Just have all the information you can get, and good luck.

JayGatsbysWealth · 05/01/2018 12:30

Definitely chill and buy Huggies Dry Nites! It's not considered an issue till they're at least 7 and even then it's quite common.

Up his water intake as others have said. You need to make sure his bladder is stretching. Also good idea to ensure there is no constipation as the bowel lies above the bladder, and can press on it in the night.

Lifting them in the night isn't recommended as you are only curing the symptoms. It doesn't achieve them waking up by themselves when they have a full bladder if you are just taking them for a wee in their sleep.

My son (nearly 9) is under the school nurse and is currently trying a bedwetting alarm, which I have another thread on and will update when I have definitive success but at the moment I don't want to jinx it!

I do wish more parents would admit this. It's so common. Not admitting it can cause shame in both parent and child because they think they're the only ones!

Heartoffire · 05/01/2018 12:30

Hi op. I was s bed wetter until 11. My dm used to offer me sweets not to. Sad as if I could control it.

Could you wake him to go to the loo around 12? He won’t wake up
Properly and it helped in my case.

Please chill. He will be anxious enough. He will grow out of it. It’s not your fault or his.

mintbiscuit · 05/01/2018 12:32

As other posters have said, night training takes longer as it's hormonal. Best off putting him in night time pants, it's really not worth stressing him or yourselves over.

JayGatsbysWealth · 05/01/2018 12:32

Oh and no brown/dark/blackcurrant drinks at all or orange juice in the evening. In fact I wouldn't even give juice at teatime, as it irritates the bladder.

insancerre · 05/01/2018 12:33

Lifting is not recommended either nor is waking them up to pee
It's not going to help him recognise when his bladder is full, in fact, it will delay that process

Heartoffire · 05/01/2018 12:33

lifting them in the night isn’t reccommended

See your general point as it doesn’t cure the problem but if you had been that child and it stoooed you waking up in s cold wet bed you would understand how much lifting helps the child’s hapoiness

It’s not all about curing it’s about managing the child’s dignity and sense of self worth too.

DeleteOrDecay · 05/01/2018 12:34

Just put him in a pull up, once he wakes up dry then he's ready for them to be removed. You can't really force night dryness it happens on its own.

DeleteOrDecay · 05/01/2018 12:36

You don't need to lift to maintain the child's dignity. A pull up will do a good job of that.

macnab · 05/01/2018 12:38

Well he's not dry at night yet, so why are you letting him wet the bed every night? Just put him in pullups at night until he's dry. As others have said, many many children are not dry at night until a lot older. Our DS almost 10 and only dry in the last few months. And that was after medical intervention - which they wouldn't even begin to look at until he was 8 yrs old. You cannot night train a child, their bodies need to produce a hormone that stops you weeing in your sleep and for lots of children this hormone doesn't kick in until much later, even if they've no day-time issues at all.

macnab · 05/01/2018 12:38

Well he's not dry at night yet, so why are you letting him wet the bed every night? Just put him in pullups at night until he's dry. As others have said, many many children are not dry at night until a lot older. Our DS almost 10 and only dry in the last few months. And that was after medical intervention - which they wouldn't even begin to look at until he was 8 yrs old. You cannot night train a child, their bodies need to produce a hormone that stops you weeing in your sleep and for lots of children this hormone doesn't kick in until much later, even if they've no day-time issues at all.

Heartoffire · 05/01/2018 12:38

Explained that badly.

Lifting may delay and does not cure but if we recognise that kids generally grow out of the problem anything that helps the child to not wake up in a wet bed in the mean time is bloody wonderful.

I have the view of a child who was a bed wetter though and not a parent of one. Surprisingly none of my kids did.

Must be hard op. But it’s so common

JayGatsbysWealth · 05/01/2018 12:38

@Heartoffire I understand that, but my son doesn't wake up so he is not unhappy. He will lie in cold wee for hours! I was the same when I was young.

His shame comes from wearing pull-ups. Which is why I am tackling the problem.

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