To think my 6 year old DDs should be able to entertain themselves for a couple of hours without any input from me?

[sandyballs]

[angry}. This was yesterday morning, and it's still bugging me. DH was working and I told the girls that I needed a couple of hours to change the beds, do a bit of paperwork and have a nice long shower. Too much to ask? I didn't think so bearing in mind they have a room full of toys, a garden full of toys, plus each other to play with. I made it clear to them that when I'd done all this stuff we could go out in the sunshine somewhere and have some fun.

Well they didn't leave me alone for more than 10 minutes at a time - they squabbled, sulked, argued, moaned, whined. I ended up shouting and everyone was miserable.

I'm sure my parents didn't "do" things all the time with me and my brother, we just got on and played and parents were in the background for the odd chat. DH thinks I've made our DD's like this by doing too much with them in the past and now they don't know how to amuse themselves .

Views much appreciated please, particularly from those with vile 6 year old girls .

TWO HOURS???
you are kidding

lol at yr last post sandyballs.

"slight pause then a thud and a scream" oh yes I know it well....

DD is 6, and an only child who generally wants to be where she can see/hear me. If I'm in the sitting room, she'll potter on her own (though not for two hours). She also will sit and read a book (for up to an hour at a time) while I work.

Unlike Issymum, I announce to dd that I am unavailable for play/conversation/general interaction. Once I've given her the 'groundrules', she'll happily occupy herself. If I don't let her know, she'll pester me mercilessly.

Sandyballs: We've only just started the going downstairs thing. Before that we put their breakfast in a cool bag and left it in the middle of their bedroom when we went to bed.

DH is very good at growling from under the covers and they know we absolutely won't get out of bed unless blood is involved, so they've given up trying.

They do sometimes make us breakfast - juice in plastic cups, ham sandwiches and sultanas anyone?

It's a hard one. Children are different, parents are different and the mixture of genes and culture produces different outcomes... as we all know.

My daughter (2.5) can entertain herself for hours. We live in a big child proof flat, so ever since we've lived here (we moved in when she was 11 months and could already walk) she has had the run of the place, and I bought her a scooter and tricycle and balls to play with in the hall and corridor. And she has easels for drawing and played with stickers long before she could hold a pencil and draw. And she has a dolls house with lots of really fun and interesting furniture and furnishings (I spent a lot of time collecting interesting things for it) and people, and dolls and all their clothes and furniture. And she reads books to herself (she knows the stories by heart). Sometimes she watches DVDs of Maisy, but she has no TV or music. So yes, I suppose I have consciously done the school of benign neglect, albeit making sure she has masses of things to do that aren't passive entertainment, and she has learnt very well to get on with things by herself. She comes to see me when I am otherwise occupied, and after a bit she wants to go out, but she doesn't just sit there expecting to be entertained like my stepsons do (who had a completely different upbringing).

Maybe it's what children are used to now. I think it's reasonable for children to expect to entertain themselves without intervention, particularly if they have a houseful of toys/ company/ outside space.

When I was small, i was told to "go to play" outside, like everyone else. I'm sure this helped develop my self-confidence and independence, as well as empathy with other people's need for peace and quiet.