to cry over my cleaner

[Sloven]

I posted this morning about today being my first day for having a cleaner and I was really nervous about it. I have joint and mobility problems and have been struggling with a 3 bed house and a DC for some time. Mess makes me stressed and depressed, and i work full time and thought it would be a good use of my income.

I stripped the beds, did a couple of hours of tidying this morning, wrote lists, went and got cleaning materials, and know that tomorrow I will be aching all over from doing a pre-clean but got on with it because I am houseproud and didn't want her to think I am a slob.

She was due at 1pm and I sat in and waited for her. I booked through an agency and did not have her phone number.

At 130 I left a message with the agency asking if everything was okay as I was concerned she hadn't turned up. I know things overrun sometimes so I wasn't annoyed, just enquiring. I have to leave for the school run at 250 and wanted to make sure we had enough time to chat first.

She turned up at 150 saying she needed to find somewhere to park. I pointed out some of the places where there was parking this time of day and went and sat back at my dining table to wait.

At 2:20 I got a call from the agency saying she had decided not to take the job on as the free parking in my area was too far away for her to walk. (It is 2 streets away for gods sake).

I was very nice to the agency - who are charging me £70 a month with £140 upfront to broker this 5-hours-a-week cleaner, and that does not include her £40 a week fee. I politely asked them to arrange me another cleaner for next week as I am working away all week this week now.

I put the phone down and burst into tears. I have been looking forward to this so much, having a clean home again, not feeling worthless or useless, being able to breathe without worrying about carrying a hoover up the stairs, etc. I was genuinely excited, put a pot of coffee on, bought a nice handover book. It seems ridiculous but having a neat home is very important to me and I was so looking forward to it.

And the gall of her not bothering to tell me herself but calling the agency to get them to cancel the job - 80 minutes after her agreed start time!

I am sad and cross and sore and disappointed and now have to live in this shitty hovel for yet another week. And I just need some flowers and a hug.

Tempted to take the £40 I would have spent on her today and buy myself some gin and roses.

[PerkingFaintly]

Oh Sloven.

I'm so sorry it was a bust this time.

[IllegalBlonde]

What a shitty day for you. I really hope it works out for you. I would defo buy the gin and flowers.

[Sloven]

Genuinely shocked @fizz. You don't know me at all and that is a truly horrible thing to say.

[PerkingFaintly]

Sounds like it was a lucky escape though.

Lots and lots of good luck for finding a decent one. It really will be worth it.

[Therealslimshady1]

Nothing wrong with using an agency, as such. I have done it.

In some areas it is very very hard to find a cleaner at all, and people are possessive and guard their cleaners' details (because, what if you pay them more!).

I would love a cleaner, but my friends all say their cleaners are booked up, and agencies charge £18 an hour.... (SE!)

[Sloven]

@AtHome77

The agency recommended a book, that wasn't me being 'hard work'. To write jobs list in so it could be ticked off, for the cleaner to write if she needed materials, in case anyone comes to the door/parcels delivered etc, and as a record of hours. I don't see this as weird?

[Vitalogy]

Can me or Santawontbelong help? What area are you in?

[HamSandWitches]

I would ask the agency for the money back and look for a cleaner on Facebook. There are loads who have pages where people leave reviews I can see.

What your paying seems far too much and 5hrs per week seems a lot. Try and get estimates elsewhere. Once they do the big first clean the ly won't take as long the following weeks. The going rate round here seems to be about £12phr

[Evelynismyspyname]

Sloven I understand where you're coming from using an agency, but that agency sounds rubbish. The cleaner also gets a poor rate even though you pay a lot, so the cleaner won't be motivated most likely.

I struggled with the idea of a cleaner on lots of levels but finally got one recently - we use a small agency (the owner actively does cleaning as well as employing 3 permanent and various part time cleaners). The owner herself spent an hour and a half at our house (not charged) before we signed up - private cleaners are hard to find where I live especially as for various reasons we didn't want to be employing someone "under the table" and was a two way interview but the end result is a reliable, fully insured, professional and above board service.

Could you find another, more personal, agency?

[Sloven]

@vitalogy I don't want to out myself sadly, but thankyou for the offer. I don't think I'm in your area.

[PerkingFaintly]

And what's with all the people putting the boot in?

Going via an agency is a perfectly sensible way to do things if you don't have personal recommendations. The agency is supposed to care about its reputation and therefore care about the behaviour of its staff. Clearly this doesn't always work out, but it's less random than a card in newsagent's window.

I actually did find my cleaners through a card in a window, but I'm perfectly well aware that it was pure luck who phoned up.

[Sloven]

@Evelyn that sounds ideal to be honest 😍

[ZuzuMyLittleGingersnap]

"When you have mobility and health issues - this morning’s events are a much bigger deal than to a healthy person".

^ This. So much.

As is having to relinquish another bit of independence.

Hope you get things sorted ASAP, OP.

[ExConstance]

I use an agency for my cleaner, it works very well and I usually get the same, very reliable, cleaner. If she is away they send another nice lady and if all else fails the owner of the agency does it herself. Every week we come home to a lovely clean house on a Thursday evening.

In the past I have employed directly and had problems with cleaners not coming for reasons such as family problems or not cleaning very well and being too shy to raise it. I leave the house very tidy for the cleaner but don't pre clean, we book 3 hours which seems about right.

[Sloven]

@Perking I thought it was just me being a bully martyr sensitive soul....

[holdthewine]

I have a chronic illness which causes me great pain and exhaustion and it’s just the kind of thing which would make me cry so my heart goes out to you. It takes such a girding of loins and effort to prep for something and then it doesn’t happen.

I have several friends who will only employ cleaners via agencies as they don’t want to be part of the ‘cash in hand’ black economy and want to be covered if a cleaner trips down the stairs or something. Also in some areas they’re like gold dust.

If you’re by any chance in North London OP I might be able to get you a recommendation if you PM me. But fingers crossed your second attempt with the agency is successful.

[Sloven]

@holdthewine

Not N.London I'm afraid but thankyou for thinking of me x

[Lozmatoz]

I’ve had A bad experience with an agency toO. See if you can get a nice local person who charges less because the not to an agency, and who will probably do a better job for you.

[AntiGrinch]

I've used two agencies. One of them ended a bit badly - there was some whingeing about my hoover where they were being a bit snitty that I rather took to heart and just thought, fuck it, I don't need it. The second one - OH MY GOD they were so SHIT. Absolute rip off merchants. Sent me the weirdest, laziest, craziest, dodgiest people. One after another these freakshows would turn up and then, ultimately (or fairly soon) not turn up.

I have a cleaner now who put a card in Tesco local looking for work. She's great, I got proper personal references, she's local (no whingeing about bus or train or car broken down - FFS!!! yes I know transport issues can happen but most people who have a job have a way that USUALLY works of getting to work!) and contactable. Jesus, these flaky people who always have dodgy phones and no credit and never show up when / where they said they would and seem to think it is somehow not their fault that they have no credit.

Yep. Find a real person and know that every penny you pay is going into their pocket.

[SecretSmellies]

I would ask discreetly the friends you know who have cleaners, who you might have cleaners. We found ours by word of mouth and have recommended her several times- she's been with us 20 years now and is worth her weight in gold. Had to try out a couple though.

Why are your family sneering of you having a cleaner? You are entitled to spend your money on anything you please, no matter what extraneous circs make it even MORE of an essential. (Illness, working etc). FWIW, I had a family member sneer at me for being too hoity toity to do my own cleaning and she shut up quick bloody smart when I asked her if I should sack a professional who provided me with a professional service and who was relying on clients like me to pay her taxes, child care, children etc just because she [family member] thought it was somehow extravagant or 'off' to outsource something I truly did not wish to spend my very limited spare time doing.

[unfortunateevents]

Well if you are anywhere near Woking/Weybridge I can recommend a fantastic cleaning agency, family-run, who have never once let me down. They have great cleaners who really take pride in their work and they bring all their own materials.

[nocampinghere]

Cleaners don't want to work for an agency who cream off their wages - they only do if they can't get work directly themselves and good cleaners are in high demand. Obvoiusly i am only talking about where i live, it might be different in your area.

You need to find one through word of mouth. Pay them well, treat them well (i'm sure you would) and they'll stay with you for years.

Good luck finding someone, don't give up but definitely sack the agency and get your money back.

[SecretSmellies]

My post was jumbled.

But, what I am saying is that you probably have friends or neighbours who DO have cleaners who you can ask. You can ask discreetly, see what they say. (Many people IME are very quiet about the extra help they have in the house..... ironing services, cleaners etc.... perhaps because they get sneered at too... But if you ask will say. Maybe my friends only, but that is what I have seen).

[ringle]

YANBU

and gin.

[SecretSmellies]

Oh yes. And gin. :)