to cry over my cleaner

[Sloven]

I posted this morning about today being my first day for having a cleaner and I was really nervous about it. I have joint and mobility problems and have been struggling with a 3 bed house and a DC for some time. Mess makes me stressed and depressed, and i work full time and thought it would be a good use of my income.

I stripped the beds, did a couple of hours of tidying this morning, wrote lists, went and got cleaning materials, and know that tomorrow I will be aching all over from doing a pre-clean but got on with it because I am houseproud and didn't want her to think I am a slob.

She was due at 1pm and I sat in and waited for her. I booked through an agency and did not have her phone number.

At 130 I left a message with the agency asking if everything was okay as I was concerned she hadn't turned up. I know things overrun sometimes so I wasn't annoyed, just enquiring. I have to leave for the school run at 250 and wanted to make sure we had enough time to chat first.

She turned up at 150 saying she needed to find somewhere to park. I pointed out some of the places where there was parking this time of day and went and sat back at my dining table to wait.

At 2:20 I got a call from the agency saying she had decided not to take the job on as the free parking in my area was too far away for her to walk. (It is 2 streets away for gods sake).

I was very nice to the agency - who are charging me £70 a month with £140 upfront to broker this 5-hours-a-week cleaner, and that does not include her £40 a week fee. I politely asked them to arrange me another cleaner for next week as I am working away all week this week now.

I put the phone down and burst into tears. I have been looking forward to this so much, having a clean home again, not feeling worthless or useless, being able to breathe without worrying about carrying a hoover up the stairs, etc. I was genuinely excited, put a pot of coffee on, bought a nice handover book. It seems ridiculous but having a neat home is very important to me and I was so looking forward to it.

And the gall of her not bothering to tell me herself but calling the agency to get them to cancel the job - 80 minutes after her agreed start time!

I am sad and cross and sore and disappointed and now have to live in this shitty hovel for yet another week. And I just need some flowers and a hug.

Tempted to take the £40 I would have spent on her today and buy myself some gin and roses.

[EvelynWardrobe]

Hopefully the agency will give her short shrift and will send you someone much better.

No shame in being overtaken by your house, it's easy to lose concentration for five minutes and end up in a midden, happens here all the time! It's awful to look around your home and find it stressful and upsetting.

[Sloven]

@ewen1234

They have 4.8/5 on TrustPilot. The agency is used by a lot of people and they seem to be favourably talked about online. I did read the reviews. I guess I was just unlucky with this one!

[Stormzy]

I cried my eyes out after posting an AIBU thread last week. I won't be doing it again! Don't know why people have such vitriol and hatred in them. Hope you find someone lovely. And you definitely deserve some and

[ewen1234]

Ahhh... Really sorry, I read the post too quickly. I think the next time you should check out the "reviews" before hiring someone..XXX

[Sloven]

No she turned up at 150 and buggered off to 'find parking'. Never returned. Agency called at 220 to say she wasn't coming back.

[ewen1234]

Im so sorry for you, but correct me if Im wrong but you said "she turned up at 1.50" but then you got a call from the agency at "2.20" saying she decided not to take the job.. So was she there when you got the call from the agency??..So was she there for half an hour already??. Sorry, if ive misread this, but I work as a Legal Secretary and we have a person who we have hired from an agency who "Claims" to be a Legal Secretary and I kid you not, a five year old could do better.

Complain to the agency and give them instructions that unless they send someone who knows what they are doing, not to bother sending anyone at all.

PS. I know you were probably only doing this as a pride sort of thing, but, you should not have to do a pre-clean for a cleaner coming to your home!!.. XXX

[Honeybooboo123]

i understand your frustration, sometime life just feels like yet more sh*t to sort out and an every growing to do list. If you think you have a big piece sorted and it falls a part I've been known to have a little cry.

We had a private cleaner who was useless but a friend recommended her neighbour who runs a company. Have the same lovely cleaner most weeks but if she can't make it another comes. Brilliant. Don't need to buy cleaning products either and although we do tidy before she comes she does say she likes our house because she feels like she makes a big difference when she cleans! Err... two DC.

anyway, onwards and upwards. You'll find the perfect cleaner soon :)

[londonrach]

And enjoy your gin and flowers

[londonrach]

Agency broke contact...full refund and cancel them. Small claims etc. They over priced. Talk to neighbours and see if you can find a recommendation for a cleaner

[snowtippedmountain]

Wow op, some nasty mumsnetters out tonight!!
Sorry you've had this issue, I've had similar and it IS very frustrating.
Don't pay the agency another penny, they haven't supplied you with the service, you don't need to.

I asked on FB if anybody could recommend a cleaner and a friend of a friend volunteered, 18 months down the line and it's working great.

Don't let negative reactions put you off asking around. Having a cleaner is a very very normal thing to do, it doesn't mean you're lazy, just busy and willing to pay somebody to shoulder a little of your load.

Sending hope tomorrow's a better day!

[Sloven]

@zebrano Thankyou for your lovely words,that means a lot especially after some of the stuff here today. x

[zebrano]

Some unpleasant responses on here! If you have a chronic illness then of course it will be extremely upsetting to be let down in this way. It takes a lot in the first place to even come to the decision to get a cleaner in the first place. Admission that you can't manage, overriding discomfort at allowing somebody into your home to get things sorted. OP has also mentioned that family aren't supportive of her decision to get some help so that will make it harder too.

OP, you sound absolutely lovely and i totally understand how you've felt let down today. I'm rooting for you to find a great cleaner who will make a real difference to your life. I'm quite new to having a cleaner but ours is a lovely lady and I'd be lost without her, we've built a good relationship in the 10 months or so she's been with us.

[ForgivenessIsDivine]

I have used three agencies in my time, first one sacked me, when I complained that they were not lifting the rugs to hoover under them and not cleaning under the sofas and were coming at a time different to that which had been agreed by them, I was too awkward apparently.

Second one was amazing, lovely lady owner who came round with the cleaner to go through things and flexible when I needed to change days.

Third one was also disastrous, the cleaner they sent tried to rearrange the days, didn't turn up as she was on holiday that hadn't been agreed with the agency and then didn't turn up because she was helping a friend who was having a crisis. I eventually managed to convince the agency to refund their agency fees.

[DanglyBatOrnaments]

I am not just saying this because I own one but ..

Have you thought about trying a private company who hire and train their staff directly rather than an agency?

I know they are more expensive but believe me, (and I know many business owners of these across the UK now) the personal service a private cleaning business will train their staff to deliver is worth the extra.

The private cleaning company is not a business for 'easy profit' like the agency model - and i do know that agency owners also work hard for their money but it is less money per job and less work for them to do that the customers will benefit from, their input is just what you pay for and the staff are paid min wage on a self employed contract.

I think there are variables of service level within each category of the industry and you do need to kiss a few frog to find the match for your needs but with a private company you have the advantage (in most cases) of a passionate business owner who wishes to hire and train others to provide the service he/she set out to deliver. They will fully manage the relationship and supervise and often provide all equipment and train the staff to use these effectively and safely.

An agency will just send a self-employed cleaner to you for labour only and replace the person if you do not get along.

Neither is wrong but one is considerably or expensive to deliver to a client than another, but the private company option is far more controlled and managed for you than the cheaper agency option.

It's about finding the service level to match your own needs,

[Justabadwife]

Why are people blaming the @OP? I would and have been really pissed off to have paid for someone to come to your house and do a job for them to not turn up. (or in this case just go and find somewhere to park and not come back)


If this post was about a plumber or an electrician not turning up would the pitchforks and torches have come out?

[Mumoftwoyoungkids]

Local mums site. Go back through a few posts. There will be a request for cleaner recommendations.

[mishfish]

Please sack that agency off.

If they’re like the agency I briefly used the £40 per week you’re paying directly to her is all she’s taking home from this (£8ph so above minimum wage) and the money sent to the agency is their fee. Find an independent one who isn’t most likely being exploited by the agency

[Thiswitcheshatisnotmine]

I read your thread this morning (while feeding dd and looking at my cluttered shelves wondering if a cleaner would dust around the stuff or move it?). How frustrating! Buy the gin and flowers!

[RoseGoldEagle]

I use an agency and pay the same as you per hour. I like the agency because if a cleaner's off then they can send someone else. The one time they couldn't find anyone they refunded me that weeks agency fee. Sorry you've had a rubbish day Sloven, fingers crossed next week it will get sorted, gin sounds good in the mean time (oh- and I have a book too, nowt wrong with that IMO!)

[ZaphodBeeblerox]

OTOH I do make myself a cup of coffee at about the time the cleaner arrives, and always offer her a cup (or tea if she’d like), but I do the same for anyone doing any work in the house - plumber / cleaner / electrician etc.

Funny how one person’s polite is atrocious to someone else!

[ZaphodBeeblerox]

I think @harshbuttrue1980 was telling me off for not loading the dishwasher the day before our cleaner comes. Not sure why that’s impolite to you. I understand she is a human being - I treat her with politeness and respect. All our dishes are rinsed to get rid of the food and piled in the sink. I don’t physically load them into the dishwasher when I know she is coming the next morning because she can do it. I also don’t strip the beds - but leave her to change the sheets. It’s a job, not sure what makes it “disgusting” tbh.

Then again my sheets don’t have semen stains, my loos don’t have poo stuck on them and even my dirty plates don’t have day old food on them, so maybe we have different images in our heads of what we’re leaving for the cleaner.

If I did all of that though I wouldn’t really be paying her to do very much.

[HopelesslydevotedtoGu]

I would have been really upset in the op's shoes. Really disappointing to be surrounded by mess/ dirt when you were expecting your house to be all lovely and clean.

This agency sounds dreadful though. Not because the cleaner was bad - a generally ok agency could have a random bad new cleaner - but their (lack of) response to it. I would have expected a profuse apology and refund and a goodwill gesture to try and keep your business. It seems like the agency think this situation is reasonable, when in face it is terrible customer service on their part.

I'd get rid of this agency and preferably find a cleaner directly by word of mouth recommendations, or try a different agency. I prefer direct as the cleaner gets more money and I think that makes them less likely to move on.

Also do manage your expectations. When you find a good cleaner, it's wonderful to come home to a lovely clean house. But you may not find them straight away. Our first cleaner started well but started coming late and leaving early, which was disappointing. Our second has been great, but I remember the first week she did some additional ironing for us we were disappointed to come home and find everything badly ironed. We decided to give it another week and she figured it out and now irons fine.

It just sounds like you are understandably really excited about getting a cleaner,but your high excitement has made the disappointment so much worse. It can take a little while to sort out a great cleaner, so don't be disheartened that it hasn't worked out yet

[Josieannathe2nd]

Oh that is rubbish. I had a very slow recovery after DS2, found a cleaner off gumtree. When she turned up (after me going to a massive effort of making my home semi tidy. When she turned up it became apparent she thought it was a chat/interview & I thought it was a 2 min chat/interview & a clean. Happily she did stay & clean (& I still have her 4 years later). I would have been gutted if she hadn’t tuned up that day- it was at the point of desperation we decided to get a cleaner.

[user1472333009]

kolonya (sorry don't know how to tag) & the other poster who said not to make the cleaner a coffee, why the hell not! I'm a self employed cleaner & I very much appreciate having a coffee made for me, it shows they see me as more than just the hired help. Do you have coffees at your workplace? It may be a business relationship but if you treat me right I'll stay around a lot longer, In fact I've had clients who'd make themselves a drink & didn't offer me one (rude) guess who I got rid of first when I was snowed under?
Op that's terrible behaviour I would never do that. Hope you get sorted soon.

[Sloven]

Oh sod it IDC if this is outing. South east Essex.