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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

people who return clothes for a refund after wearing them

121 replies

tenpencemixup · 27/09/2017 13:22

Not because of a fault with the item but because they don't to pay to buy it. Is this really a thing? I don't know anyone who has done this but apparently there are people that buy something new from a store/online, keep the tags on, wear to the event, then return to the shop as unworn for a refund? like a hire purchase but without the fee!

I've just seen it discussed online on a fashion/parenting group and the way it was discussed so openly, without shame or remorse made me think that it's more common that I thought.

Apparently
it's not theft because they return the item
stores over price items so why should they pay
other people don't mind wearing used clothes as it's only the same as trying on in a changing room
it's up to the store to decide if it's worn, not the customer to admit it was worn
a customer buying something new isn't getting a pristine product anyway as the manufacturing process means it's been handled by many people already
if it's only going to be worn once it doesn't matter

Aside from the moral and fraud? aspect I don't know how they do it. I wouldn't be able to relax and enjoy the event wearing an item knowing I was going to return it. what if it got dirty? smelly? other people's smoke? ripped? etc

Do stores know this type of behaviour goes on? Do they write it off as losses? Sell on to other customers knowing that it's worn?

other people tried suggesting that if you can't afford a full price item there are other ways of buying fashion. ebay, buying selling sites, charity shops etc. or buy new, but sell on and list as worn once to recoup costs. Just couldn't get through to them. they want new fashion items , but don't want to pay to wear them.

OP posts:
BabsGanoush · 27/09/2017 14:41

Years ago (80's) there was a young woman in town who opened a clothes boutique.

I highly suspect she and her friends wore the clothes and then were put straight back on the rail as an awful lot of clothes were covered in make and perfume.

LeninaCrowne · 27/09/2017 14:42

In a fairly posh shoe shop, the assistant brought out a pair to try on, but they had obviously been worn and returned as the uppers were creased and faded and the soles had had a fair bit of wear. Funny enough I didn't buy them myself - they were full price!

Dreams16 · 27/09/2017 14:42

Yes I've heard of people doing it and I think it's wrong too if you can't afford to pay for something then don't try and con the shops and some other unlucky person who will end up with your hand me downs it's grim

DSHathawayGivesMeFannyGallops · 27/09/2017 14:43

YANBU. As a retailer I also think it's hard to challenge people if you have a relaxed return policy. A lady once returned a kids top she admitted her dd had worn and that they'd washed- her husband had decided he didn't like the shape on Dd. She got very abusive and said it was our own fault when she was told no! Company policy was to shut people up even if they had to break their own rules to do so. So she got her refund.

An ex colleague used to wear and return- she used our store kimble gun and steamer to freshen up and retag a few things before she took them back to another shop! Shock

Dreams16 · 27/09/2017 14:44

What annoys me is I've worked in retail that bloody slogan customers are always right needs to be done away with because customers aren't always right they are twats half the time and think it's fine to abuse staff just trying to do their job

Jaxhog · 27/09/2017 14:45

It's immoral and theft. It's also one reason WHY clothes prices are so high.

caringdenise009 · 27/09/2017 14:45

When my mum worked in m&s she had a woman come to return a dress who was outraged when the request was refused. Why not? She demanded.

Because it's got a Debenhams label it.

I got stuck in TK MAX behind a young girl returning a suitcase full of clothes and shoes. She was obviously a friend of the checkout girl who was saying stuff like oh you looked great in this dress as she was scanning the tags. The returner was also talking about the next lot of stuff she was going to get with the refund.

Uumellmahaye · 27/09/2017 14:45

Mrs Slocombe takes a very dim view of customers trying that!

people who return clothes for a refund after wearing them
koalab · 27/09/2017 14:45

I think I read the same thing as you op. I was shocked at how brazen the poster was that that was what she was planning on doing. I had no idea it went on.

JaneEyre70 · 27/09/2017 14:46

That's why I wash everything before I wear it.

Anymajordude · 27/09/2017 14:47

I work in a shop. For all internet sales we kimble a returns label to dangle in a very obvious place so this can't be done. We don't accept returns if the label is off.

OhThisbloodyComputer · 27/09/2017 14:48

I bought one of those plastic bags from Marks and Spencer.

I took it for a night out but then I decided it wasn't really me.

Luckily, I'd kept the receipt. Normally I just throw my rubbish out on the street - it proves jobs for the council.

So I took the bag back to the refunds department and got my five pence back.

What annoyed me was that the lady behind the counter had the cheek to sniff test it, so see if I'd been wearing it! She did this in front of all the other ladies. it was so humiliating.

BorisTrumpsHair · 27/09/2017 14:53

I know someone who has done this - back in the days when M&S still made very nice dresses. I was Shock

Nowadays I notice clothing comes with obvious tags on underarms or hems etc that need to be left on if you want to return them - I guess to get around this wear and return practice.

I do think it is a fraud, and also it is pretty common.

My friend runs a successful vintage (second hand) clothing business on ebay. He encounters assholes of every flavour every single day - nothing surprises me after hearing what he has to deal with re people and clothing.

DuckOffAutocorrectYouShiv · 27/09/2017 14:57

I once bought a dress online from Flannels that arrived as a filthy rag. Absolutely manky. Deodorant marks in the armpits, make up marks on the neckline and half dropped hem Angry. Whether it was an ex-store job, in horrible condition from endless trying on, or a disgusting return, I'll never know. How Flannels could justify sending it out to me in that condition is utterly mystifying. They offered me a discount 'if I wanted to keep it'. Errr, nope, you're ok.

ApplesTheHare · 27/09/2017 14:58

Thanks NameChange, I think everyone does things they later come to view as wrong. Sometimes I feel for politicians, etc., who are held to account for every word they say for their entire lifetime. Part of being human is developing views and opinions, and hopefully becoming a better person for it.

Eliza9917 · 27/09/2017 15:04

Yip. I knew girls years ago who worked in clothes shops and it was a thing. It wasn't customers wearing and returning it was them and not frowned upon at that time. They would wear something from the shop to work in and then stick it back on the hanger to sell. Pretty common I believe.

When I worked in New Look in 6th form, they used to tell us to do this.

MsHarry · 27/09/2017 15:11

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

theDudesmummy · 27/09/2017 15:15

I buy clothes on the internet all the time (M and S, White Stuff, Amazon) and try them on then return the ones I don't want, they don't have to be defective. I don't have time to go to actual shops to try things on. But I would never return them after I have worn them! If I wear them and then decide they don't work on me, well tough luck. Give them to Oxfam or try and sell on eBay.

OCSockOrphanage · 27/09/2017 15:16

We bought a jacket from M&S and found a pair of RayBan sunglasses in the pocket. DS was thrilled!

BorisTrumpsHair · 27/09/2017 15:16

Great gift with purchase OCSock

BorisTrumpsHair · 27/09/2017 15:19

I'm pretty sure you are being racist MsHarry iykwim

DuckOffAutocorrectYouShiv · 27/09/2017 15:20

You aren't being as subtle as you think you are, Harry

[sledgehammer]

Standandwait · 27/09/2017 15:21

Extending this thought, I once mentioned to a friend that when I buy a book, if I bring it home and find by the end of the first chapter that I'm not going to read it, I return it. She was horrified and thought that was unethical, and I was frankly baffled. To me it was the equivalent of buying a piece of clothing, taking it home to check against the colours in your existing wardrobe/natural light/a reliable mirror and then returning it. (Bear in mind I'm talking about books with 25-40 chapters, not slim paperbacks -- books where I'd have read less than 5% of the text and left no sign of use like creased spine. And bear in mind that I buy, on average, at least five books a week!)

What do the rest of you think? AIBU?

maddiemookins16mum · 27/09/2017 15:24

My friend does this when she goes to weddings. Eyes up a nice dress, buys it very close to the date, wears it, hangs it out on a hanger on the line to air. Takes it back and says it's the wrong style for her.

DuckOffAutocorrectYouShiv · 27/09/2017 15:26

I think of that as the equivalent of reading the first few pages in the shop, tbh. So long as it isn't sitting in your house being used as a coaster before being returned, then I think it's fine.