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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

for not wanting to look after neighbours house!

35 replies

dmo · 02/04/2007 19:45

our old neighbours were fab we used to go out all together and still see them, but they had to sell and move elsewhere.
anyway a young couple bought the house (about 8 yrs younger than us) but they might aswel be 60 yrs older!!!
they moan if the football goes into their garden (we have 2 boys aged 9 and 10) and are forever doing DIY at 10pm
anyway nice as i am i alway post in my old mags for the girl to read
anyway they told me about 8 mths ago that they were getting married on 30th March so i bought them a lovely guest book which they were over the moon with, we didnt get an invite to the wedding which is fine as we havent really spoke to each other for 4 mths, anyway this morning came down and there was a note behind the door from our neighbours saying hi we hhave set off on our honeymoon here is a key could you look after our house for us/turn light on and off etc etc we will be back 16th April [shock WTF dont feel like doing it as it would have been nice to be asked if this is ok. what would you do? need to know soon as its going dark but my thoughts are sod them

OP posts:
tribpot · 02/04/2007 19:48

That is bizarre, do they think you run some sort of charitable "do the lights and curtains" service for the neighbourhood?!

I mean, I ask my neighbours to keep an eye on the place when we're away but the key things here are (a) I ask them (b) I don't expect them to do lights (hello, buy some timers) and (c) we speak to each other quite frequently.

Mad!

Freckle · 02/04/2007 19:48

Seems like a huge imposition of they didn't take the time to talk to you about it. I'd be tempted to post the key back and say that you can't take on that sort of responsibility in case you are held liable for anything that happens.

Although you may wish them to do the same for you in the future......

LilyLoo · 02/04/2007 19:50

Would leave the lights thing etc. That cheeky imo esp if they haven't asked. We normally leave key and alarm code in case of a problem. Just keep an eye on it.

CristinaTheAstonishing · 02/04/2007 19:50

That's cheeky on their part. Keep an eye on it as you would anyway, just don't feel the need to go inside, turn on the lights, air the bedrooms etc. I wonder if you'll get a postcard.

maisym · 02/04/2007 19:50

have they left a number? call them. Could they get their family or friends to do this?

Original poster
dmo · 02/04/2007 19:51

just think it would be nice to be asked in person
my boys are off school from thursday and i have taken their 2nd week as holidays which we could have been going away (but were not) but they dont know that

OP posts:
LilyLoo · 02/04/2007 19:53

I wouldn't change your plans just check it looks ok when you passing.

Original poster
dmo · 02/04/2007 19:55

no phone number nothing
wouldnt know who to call if there was a problem.
they had their gutters fixed 3 mths ago and i was in our front room and heard lots of ladders banging etc so i went out and the men were in my garden standing on my plants while they fixed next doors guttering, the men said next door had said it was fine to use our garden
they were out and by the time they came home i had calmed so didnt say anything

OP posts:
tribpot · 02/04/2007 19:56

Ah, so they have previous for taking the p*ss. You need to tackle this with them upon their return. How could they possibly think it was alright to use your garden without checking with you first?

BibiThree · 02/04/2007 19:57

I'd post it back with a note saying you're away quite a bit over the holiays yourselves. That could mean day trips or overnight stays. Either way, if you ahven't got the key, you won't feel guilty about not being able to do it.
AND, if you were to accidentally break/damage something, you might get a note saying "you owe us £1000 for that lamp you turned over which set the curtains on fire and a new front door to replace the one the fire service had to bash in"
Okay so that's a little crazy, but you know what I mean. If they'd asked and you had agreed, then all's fair, but this isn't a fair ask imo.

twentypence · 02/04/2007 20:00

Come on people - you never got married and had a "oh, shit we never organised the xxx" moment?

If she'd asked you - would you really have been able to say no, or would you have just muttered something about maybe going away in the second week.

Take your boys with you and teach them about being neighbourly.

maxandmonty · 02/04/2007 20:01

oooh - i think this is really really cheeky - if you do this for them who knows what they will ask/tell you to do next time. I would be v.cross at not being asked and would post key back with a note saying as such!

princesscc · 02/04/2007 20:01

I would keep an eye on things (you don't want to be responsible if anything does happen), but when they come back, explain that actually you were away yourself for most of the Easter holiday, but if they had asked you first, they could have asked someone else.

My neighbours keep asking me to look after their house and pets when they go away, which is fine, as they are good friends - trouble is, I've killed the goldfish two years running!

NadineBaggott · 02/04/2007 20:04

Very rude.

I'd stick a note under their door saying. we'd have loved to but we're going away the day after you so here's your key back.

maisym · 02/04/2007 20:04

dmo - hearing about the gutter - I'd take the key to the police so you're not liable if any thing happens.

Sobernow · 02/04/2007 20:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

margo1974 · 02/04/2007 20:11

Hah,

As they've just got married do what my Mum and her sisters did when my uncle got married.

  1. Put clingfilm over the toilet - but put a "just married" banner over it.
  1. Put rice (uncooked) and confetti in their dressing gown pockets, shoes, coat pockets
  1. Put confetti on their bed

Thay won't ask you to house sit again, but they may see this as a touching surprise. I would be laughing at the thought that they will have to be clearing up rice for the next 2 months.

That's revenge the subtle way. (especially if they pee in the toilet without removing the clingfilm! That's why you must put a banner on the toilet so they are warned that you may have doctored it)

Warning - I am not liable for any rows which break out between you and your neighbours if you follow my advice!

margo1974 · 02/04/2007 20:57

Ohh - I've killed the thread - was my idea too psycho?

margo1974 · 02/04/2007 21:09

Now you all know never to cross me!!!

Original poster
dmo · 02/04/2007 22:14

good ideas

what about the one where you are meant to sew prawns into the curtain hem

OP posts:
twentypence · 02/04/2007 23:12

Someone at the wedding probably told her that story about the couple who came home from honeymoon and found their presents stolen, she panicked and left you the key.

I'm a little surprised that you feel you can't keep an eye on the place in these circumstances.

I'm also amazed I'm the only one that feels like this.

Freckle · 03/04/2007 08:58

I don't think the OP would have a problem looking after the property in normal circumstances. But for a neighbour, with whom you have never been particularly friendly, to just assume you are willing to take on this responsibility (and it is a responsibility) without taking the trouble to even talk to you about it, is rather taking the piss.

MARGOsBeenPlayingWithMyNooNoo · 10/04/2007 17:36

What did you do dmo?

Original poster
dmo · 10/04/2007 20:12

i'm looking after it
was not opposed to the idea just didnt like how they had done it would have been nicer to ask it person than just expect
its a good job were not going away ourselves

anyway the house is fine (touch wood)

OP posts:
Pruni · 10/04/2007 20:19

Message withdrawn