Aibu to ask if you know any housewives?

[PetalMettle]

It used to be a thing didn't it, but I don't think I know anyone without kids who doesn't go out to work

[Eastpoint]

I know some but I would never ask why they don't work, it's nothing to do with me. Generally they have largish houses and travel with their partners or have dogs with whom they spend lots of time.

[ShatnersBassoon]

Yes, I know a few with grown up children, and one who never had children but is now in her sixties and has never worked. They're not that unusual.

Plus lots with children of various ages still at home.

[JennyOnAPlate]

I know a few (neighbours) who are housewives in their late forties/early fifties with kids late teens/twenties.

I'm mostly a housewife but my dc are 7 and 9...not sure if that still qualifies me as a sahm?

[Picklepickle123]

I'm almost 30 and I know of a few friends/acquaintances that chose to be housewives. Not because SAH worked out more cost efficient or anything, because they wanted to be homemakers. As long as the partner is on board, I think it's nice. My mum was a housewife and it never did me any harm. :)

[yaela123]

Nope, no one.

I barely even know any SAHMs and the two I do know are planning to go back to work in 2/3 years when the youngest kids start school.

I guess different groups, classes and cultures are different

[musicposy]

My SIL gave up work when she married my brother. He's quite traditional and it suits them both. They do have DC now, but I don't expect she will return to work once DC are grown up.

I've had a lot of ill health recently and I'd love to give up work as it's such a struggle (although I do enjoy it on my good days). Our plan is to save what we can over the next couple of years, get our children through uni (one nearly done, one about to start), pay off the mortgage asap and then I can stop. It will suit DH much better too. I'm well enough to potter about and do the housework as it can be done at my own pace and DH will have the benefit of complete relaxation time with no jobs outside of work.

I actually think a traditional set up would have suited both of us better over the years but finances just won't stretch.

[Rainstartsplay]

It's almost the norm in my village.
Many women seem to give up work when they have DC and never return. There are lots of 50+ women with children at uni or left home that don't have paid jobs.
But volunteering is the norm, the church flower rota, PTA, village fete etc are very well organised.

[jimijack]

Actually no I don't, it's a dying breed I think, unless super rich or disability means people are unable to work, Its not a common job is it.

Interesting.

[Eastpoint]

The lack of young women not in full time work is becoming an issue for charities and other organisations like brownies, reliant on volunteers.

[Eastpoint]

By young I mean under 50.

[jimijack]

Wow reading back at your posts, it IS a common job.
I think amongst my circles, as I don't know a single housewife, it is rare.
All family and friends have paid jobs.

[AuntieStella]

Quite a lot of my DM's generation, though they're all retirement age now, so I don't know if it would count).

I can also think of a couple who SAHMed and still haven't gone back even though youngest is now final year at university. Which also might not count.

I can't think of anyone my age or younger who has just decided not to WOH./WAH.

[PetalMettle]

I would class you as A sahm @jennyonaplate, not I'm sure that you particularly care for my opinion!
@wizardoftoss when I originally posted it it was more that it just occurred to me and I was curious. However, I am now wondering - do you do all the chores/cooking/admin or do you do it during the week and share at weekends?

[Cantseethewoods]

I know a few but I'm an expat, so technically the expression is 'trailing spouse' . It's probably more common because (1) the types of jobs foreigners can get visas to do tend to be high paid so the couple can survive on one salary and (2) depending on your skill set it's not that easy to get a job here due to language and recognition of qualifications.

I actually didn't work for 2 years when we left the uk. The first year I knew after 3 months we were moving on so didn't bother and then I was pregnant so wasn't super employable and wanted longer than 10 weeks may leave. It was a fun few years but I wouldn't want to do it forever. I ended up getting a great job when ds was a year old.

[dementedma]

It's probably more common among the wealthy. ( And, I mean those who have had DC's). My friend's dp has never worked, kids were at boarding school, all the time etc. She wouldn't know a day's work if it bit her on the arse.

[IDismyname]

I've been a SAH mum for 19 years. My job at the time didn't cover nursery fees, and would have been mega stressful timewise. Also no parents nearby to help out.

So, DS off to uni, and I'm off to retrain.

Can't bl**dy wait to get my life back again.

[corythatwas]

One, I think. But they are German. I have heard the husband say that he thinks a woman's place is in the home.

Other than that only trailing spouses, as mentioned by Cantsee.

[mpsw]

Come across them in military and diplomatic families quite often.

That's because having to move frequently, or do stints overseas, is pretty hostile to having a career. So I see trailing spouses, even when back at 'home' deciding not to work (whether they have children or not). Lots of volunteering and do-gooding instead. And sometimes paid work, if something suitable can be found.

[SheepyFun]

Technically yes, my grandmother, who married in 1947 - she was required to give up her job when she got married, and has never worked outside the home since. But I suspect OP was wondering about somewhat younger examples!

[AgainPlease]

No housework, I have a cleaner once a week but the house is tidy all the time as I'm slightly OCD so I will do too-up cleans during the week.

I cook for myself and make separate meal for DH as he works long hours so leave food for him in the oven or we eat out quite a lot too.

DH does no house work and the weekends are his time off/our quality time. If the grass needs mowing or something needs fixing in the house, I'll arrange for it to be done during the week.

I should mention he's 15 years older than me. I haven't worked for 3 years and it suits our relationship and lifestyle perfectly. I have no plans to go back to work, ever. I love not waking up at 6.30 and jumping on a hot stinky commuter train.

[BorisTrumpsHair]

At our inner city London school it amazes me just how few mothers are in paid work.

Everyone seems very comfy with with one partner working, or socially housed. Or part time work.

As a ft paid working Mum I'm in the minority.

But I'm not sure any of the mums who don't work would ever describe themselves as a housewife. It's a bit old school isn't it?

[SummerMummy88]

My Mum and Mother in law are of working age but stay at home, when my kids go to school /leave home I'm planning on becoming a housewife, it's just a thing in some families.

[SummerMummy88]

I should add I don't work now, I'm a stay at home mum.