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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to feel the UK is really a bit crap?

401 replies

clogdance · 29/04/2017 21:08

We have a German exchange child staying with us. He has been learning English at school for 2 years, and is apparently not top of the class in it. He spent supper talking to me about the rights and wrongs of vegetarianism and veganism.
He also mentioned that he lives in an old house but that new houses in Germany are larger and more solidly built. Just like here then Hmm.
His family are very very pleased that they unlike us are staying in the EU. And that they, unlike us, are welcoming a very large number of Syrian refugees.
Being English feels pretty depressing.

OP posts:
Valentine2 · 29/04/2017 22:05

I really really envy the child care system of Sweden, the post natal healthcare in France and the education system of Germany.

SuperBeagle · 29/04/2017 22:05

You're basing this on your experience with one German exchange student?

YABU.

And I'm sure there many in Germany who disagree with him on many things.

If you don't like England, leave.

Sara107 · 29/04/2017 22:06

German houses are certainly much more solidly built than UK ones. Lovely heavy double glazed windows, well insulated and designed to deal with colder winters and hotter summers. I guess all countries have pros and cons, and you don't always see the cons when you're visiting. At the moment I find the UK a bit demoralising, there seems a lot of negativity around.

Aderyn2016 · 29/04/2017 22:06

Personally, I don't think Germany's open door policy was a great move. I think it is srnsible to know who is in the country.

Have lived there. My experience was that it was quite backward when it came to attitudes towards women (admittedly I lived in the arse end of nowhere and maybe cities are different). Things I take for granted just didn't exist there and it wasn't a very convenient place to live either - people were expected to adapt to businesses rather than businesses adapting to the needs of the customer, so not better than here, just different. Was a long time ago, so maybe it is different now.
I did like the child friendly attitude there though and the clean streets (no dog poo).

I think there is plenty about the UK which is lovely and plenty that isn't. Like most places it's a mixed bag.

UppityHumpty · 29/04/2017 22:06

The reason why childcare in Sweden is so good is because Swedish, Danish, and Norwegian people look down on stahp.

UppityHumpty · 29/04/2017 22:07

Should read childcare in scandinavia

thecatfromjapan · 29/04/2017 22:07

I'm not sure we are shit at teaching languages. I think that we're quite unmotivated because so much of global culture is in English. I suspect that if the vote for the national language of the US had gone to German, and films, pop music and lots of television programmes were in German, we'd be quite good at German.

Original poster
clogdance · 29/04/2017 22:11

Have you lived in France or Germany? No, then shut up.
Actually I've lived in France for several years, and have spent a lot of time in Germany, though not lived there long term. Why are you making these assumptions?

OP posts:
SleepFreeZone · 29/04/2017 22:13

Yeah yeah yeah 🙄

BuckinghamLass · 29/04/2017 22:13

I love the UK, but I moved away six years ago and whenever I return I like visiting but I'd never live there again. The erosion of public services, the high cost of everything, crappy weather and rubbish everywhere mean I don't miss it.

Aderyn2016 · 29/04/2017 22:14

Also schools have so much to teach and have been subjected to far too much tampering from successive govts that lots of subjects have been neglected.

Original poster
clogdance · 29/04/2017 22:14

I think it's really worrying that so many people are telling me to emigrate, on the basis that I've dared to express some concerns about the present day UK. Why are we not allowed to try to learn from other countries? From what they do well (which is not everything)?

OP posts:
Graphista · 29/04/2017 22:15

I lived in Germany. I also lived in Netherlands, England and Scotland (yes there is a difference).

There are pros and cons to every country.

I loved Germany and the Netherlands. I found the people friendly, helpful and polite for the most part.

But there are downsides too. Germany doesn't integrate immigrants well, especially if they're not white European ethnicity. There are lots of rules and regulations and they are adhered to. If they're not there are high fines regarding garden conditions, bin management etc.

The houses are bigger because Germany is bigger. They have more land. The reason English is spoken so widely around the world and the U.K. Is appalling in its approach to learning other languages is arrogance both historical and modern. Historically we invaded and pillaged many a country and enforced English language upon the natives then having done so we continued not to bother to learn their languages as 'well they all speak English anyway' Hmm

I have friends and family who are living/have lived in :

France
Belgium
Italy
Australia
America
Canada
India
Pakistan
Ghana
Sierra Leone...

The British really don't know they're born a lot of the time.

I hate the current govt and what they are doing to the U.K. And especially the nhs and hope that the GE leads to a temperance if not complete halt to this.

Yabu.

SuperBeagle · 29/04/2017 22:16

I just don't understand the England-bashing (I'm not English - or from the UK). The history of it is incredible and it has been, for the longest time, one of the most successful countries in the world. Some of the most brilliant minds have been English. You can look at England in 2017 and find faults with it, but you can do that with literally every other country, including those ones often touted as "the happiest places in the world".

CoolCarrie · 29/04/2017 22:16

I live in a third world country now and think the UK is brilliant.

ohhereweareagain · 29/04/2017 22:16

YABVU

Original poster
clogdance · 29/04/2017 22:18

Surely the GE is being held to increase the right-wing majority, so things will get worse.

OP posts:
Aderyn2016 · 29/04/2017 22:20

Denmark is allegedly the happiest country in the world. Have no idea why. I was bored after a week! And attitudes to sahp were awful - like you are wasting your education and failing society if you would quite like to look after your own dc instead of using childcare. Where is the freedom of choice?
I think it was no accident that my Danish mil chose to raise her dc here!

nauticant · 29/04/2017 22:21

Putting aside the fact that I would be bemused by Simon Fisher off Alan Partridge lecturing me about anything, the acid test is to move abroad and see the UK from another perspective.

I moved to one of Western Europe's paradises, the highest in the global tables of this good thing, the lowest in the global tables of that bad thing, and it was terrific. Loved the years there. Came back to the UK and realised that while many of the world's Utopias piss on the UK from high in many respects, the UK is just great on its own account in other areas.

I was speaking to a Romanian colleague recently about how she viewed her own country and she said that the one huge selling point (among many negatives) it's always had is strong social cohesion with people always willing to help out, rally around. But in her view, in the past few years that's fading away.

The UK housing stock and the terms of accessing it though is an absolute disgrace and we should hang our heads in shame.

SuperBeagle · 29/04/2017 22:22

Surely the GE is being held to increase the right-wing majority, so things will get worse.

Er. No. It's being held to solidify May's position as leader as she wasn't previously elected in. It relates to Brexit, of course, but that does not necessarily mean "an increase in the right-wing majority".

Valentine2 · 29/04/2017 22:22

The reason why childcare in Sweden is so good is because Swedish, Danish, and Norwegian people look down on stahp
What? Confused I don't know for sure but I think if we get the same child care system here, I will literally find no excuse for people to not work unless genuine medical/physical reasons are involved (which don't count in my argument anyway).

sausagedogrolls · 29/04/2017 22:22

YABVU

Yes, it's not perfect but it is much better than the majority of other countries. We do pay for healthcare but it is a very good return on investment and if you are out of work you still have access. DH's father pays £350 a month for private medical insurance. They have no public healthcare. Might not sound a lot but average take home is £800 per month.

usernamealreadytaken · 29/04/2017 22:23

If the UK really is a it crap, then why does just about everybody seemingly want to come here? I feel sorry for you, OP, that your life is so unsatisfied that the word of a young exchange student makes you believe the grass is greener across the Channel.

Aderyn2016 · 29/04/2017 22:25

Valentine, why should people work if, as a family, they can afford and would prefer for one parent to sah? You are buying into the idea that only paid employment makes people worthwhile.

AntigoneJones · 29/04/2017 22:26

Valentine - you don't think one parent should stay at home with pre schoolers then?