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AIBU?

To not let neighbour use the toilet

130 replies

Whattodo23 · 03/04/2017 16:34

I regularly have a couple of kids from street playing in my garden, just say hello to parents, don't know them well at all. One child needs a wee aibu to send her home? Don't feel right letting her use toilet given she is 7, I think. Husband is not at home but still it doesn't sit right

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Soubriquet · 03/04/2017 16:44

I wouldn't have thought twice about a seven year old needing the toilet. Would have just pointed in the direction and let them get on with it.

However I think I know where you're coming from.

In case the child turns round and said you did something inappropriate and you've got no proof you haven't as you willingly let them ib

UserSchmooser · 03/04/2017 16:45

"It's a safeguarding issue."

Jesus wept. It is nothing of the sort.

Of course you should let her use your toilet. I get the point about bum wiping after a poo but at 7 this wouldn't be an issue.

fruitbats · 03/04/2017 16:45

How strange
YABU

spidey66 · 03/04/2017 16:45

Now if it was a workman, the MN massive would say no way.....

Whattodo23 · 03/04/2017 16:45

Under and soub yes that was my thinking

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UndersecretaryofWhimsy · 03/04/2017 16:46

What the blibbering hell?

Why would using your loo inspire her to make up a story about sexual abuse? Is your toilet possessed?

Does the presence of your husband protect against children making up stories of sexual abuse?

RachelRagged · 03/04/2017 16:46

. Strange

Alisvolatpropiis · 03/04/2017 16:47

Yes yabu and a bit odd

Soubriquet · 03/04/2017 16:47

I think the chances of allegations like this are incredibly rare but in this day and age some people just can't be too careful

Shame really as years ago most houses had an open door policy

UndersecretaryofWhimsy · 03/04/2017 16:50

I'm still unclear why this girl couldn't make up a story about sexual abuse just by being in the house, and why pointing her in the direction of the bathroom makes the OP in any way more vulnerable to false accusations. A 7yo without special needs toilets herself, what conceivable risk is involved in saying 'of course, the bathroom is that way'?

What a bizarre and paranoid view of the world.

sparechange · 03/04/2017 16:51

How is it any more of a safeguarding issue than her using a public toilet?
Unless you are planning on following the poor girl in there and insisting on watching her wee

The use of 'safeguarding issue' on a thread is an almost cast-iron guarantee that the person using it has no concept of what safeguarding is at the moment. It's absurd.

RestlessTraveller · 03/04/2017 16:51

op do you allow your child to go to the toilet when she is at the other child's house?

Whattodo23 · 03/04/2017 16:52

Not that she would deliberately lie but things could be misconstrued. But I appreciate I am bu

OP posts:

ShatnersBassoon · 03/04/2017 16:53

I think the chances of allegations like this are incredibly rare but in this day and age some people just can't be too careful

Which people can't be too careful? Why in this day and age? You've lost me.

bloodymaria · 03/04/2017 16:53

It's a safeguarding issue

It is not. Unless you feel that your partner is a risk to children? In which case you probably shouldn't let your kids near him either.

VintagePerfumista · 03/04/2017 16:53

Do you let the child play at yours when your husband is at home?

Or do you kind of make everyone on the street think he might be a child abuser by not letting them anywhere near when he's there?

Just a thought.

VintagePerfumista · 03/04/2017 16:55

In this day and age....of course.

Because child abuse didn't use to happen in other days and ages.

7feathers · 03/04/2017 16:55

I get where the OP is coming from but it's a tad OTT.

WizardOfToss · 03/04/2017 16:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lilmisskittykat · 03/04/2017 16:55

Surely if you are worried there is that much of a risk you'd be better not letting them play in the garden either?

I honestly don't think it's an issue but I can see your view.. it's a sad age we live in

HecateAntaia · 03/04/2017 16:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Whattodo23 · 03/04/2017 16:56

Of course not vintage. I simply was (wrongly it seems) concerned about a child using the toilet and it becoming the norm even when partner is at home and things getting misunderstood. Fuck sake I have no concerns about him and it seems I am being irrational. So stop talking shit

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SquinkiesRule · 03/04/2017 16:58

I'd send her home too.
We used to have a neighbor kid who'd ask to go to the loo in whoever's house she was playing at. I was told by friend to send her home to pee, as she used to linger in the bathroom, nosing though cupboards, trying stuff out when she used to go in their bathroom, she was also 7.

Sunnysidegold · 03/04/2017 16:58

It's a tough one. I came home from work one night and this boy about 10 said "missus can I use your loo?" I didn't know him, and just kept thinking of me being in my house with him alone wasn't wise in the same sense the op was thinking. Asked him where he lived and he pointed to an estate a bit away. I then thought well I don't want the lad passing himself and if he was my kid I'd want someone to let him use their loo. I let him go in and I actually waited outside the house. I do massively over think things though. Just kept thinking in work we aren't supposed to be one on one with a child in a room with the door closed and my house would be a similar environment to that. Wee bugger pissed all over the seat though and didn't flush.

Whattodo23 · 03/04/2017 16:58

Can you imagine the way kids put things and how it could get confused for something sinister? Its hardly an impossibility.

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