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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to 'make do and mend'

122 replies

Blinkybell · 19/03/2017 18:39

We've had some friends to stay this weekend. Arrived late afternoon on Friday and left this afternoon and they've managed to really upset me.

On Saturday morning, DD was bunging her uniform in the washing machine when she asked if I could mend her blazer and PE skort. The pocket on her blazer had a hole in and a seam on her skort had come undone.

Friend said 'mend? Really? Why not just buy a new one?'

Because blazers are £35 and both jobs will take 10 minutes max

She said you could buy skorts in Matalan for a fiver, so I said yes, but it'll take 2 minutes to fix the seam and about 2p in cotton.

Her and her DH then fell about laughing, calling me Granny Blinky, saying 'make do and mend' in silly voices and just generally carrying on like they're the next big thing in stand up comedy.

Then she said - seriously though, aren't the kids embarrassed? I suppose you darn socks too (actually, yes, if it's just something simple like a hole in the toe, I do repair socks and tights).

DD asked what she should be embarrassed about Hmm and they went quiet.

I'm quite crafty and have made lots of stuff in our house - curtains, cushion covers, quilts for the kids, etc.

I'm knitting a big cuddly blanket at the moment. We were going out for breakfast this morning and while waiting for everyone to get ready, I knitted a couple of rows. Comments about granny Blinky again and how it's a 'real war effort round here' while standing there laughing at me.

When they left they said they were 'only joking' but I'm quite hurt by it. I don't mind a bit of banter, but this felt unpleasant - was all laugh/laugh/funny/funny at my expense.

I won't be inviting them back ever anytime soon

OP posts:
Smartiepants79 · 19/03/2017 19:04

Why would you have these people in your house. They are rude and unkind. Your DD is being brought up to appreciate her belongings and to make good use of her money.
I would have repaired both of those items especially in the middle of the school year. My mum repairs tights for me! Can't say I bother with socks though but good on you.

Babbaganush · 19/03/2017 19:07

In my world you are normal and they are idiots!

Topseyt · 19/03/2017 19:10

They were being twats. No need to invite them back.

I sew buttons on when I have to. DD3 seems to be always losing them from her school kilt. I freely admit that sewing isn't my forté so I have my limitations, but the skirts are expensive so I only buy new if she has actually outgrown it.

I don't darn socks or tights because I am so crap at it so they get replaced.

They do sound like they belong to the more money than sense brigade. Ignore them.

worriedsick2017 · 19/03/2017 19:11

Good for you! I wish I was crafty, as in could sew ect. I do own a sewing machine but still haven't got the hang of it! Shame on your friends for laughing at you! X

contractor6 · 19/03/2017 19:11

Don't they care about the environment, the blazer and skort going to land fill, the energy consumed by making and transporting new items. Reduce, reuse and recycle!

storynanny · 19/03/2017 19:13

I really despise people like that, those who mock you. I have some "friends" who have done this to me and it makes me feel really awkward and embarrased. It is especially annoying and rude when they do it in front of impressionable youngsters.
By the way I make do and mend, otherwise I would have constantly been buying new cricket trousers.

Chottie · 19/03/2017 19:14

They weren't 'only joking' though, were they? They were belittling you and acting like repairing clothes was something you should be ashamed of. Then they picked up on the knitting so they could get a few more jabs in. Who on earth laughs at someone for being able to make a blanket from scratch? Idiots.

This x 10 - they sound absolutely ridiculous - ignore, ignore, ignore

The80sweregreat · 19/03/2017 19:15

I hate sowing, wished i could knit - i would be in awe not taking the pee! They sound really nasty! What is it with people taking the mickey? I hate ridiclue of any type, you've had them all weekend and they saythis? I would be fuming too!

marriednotdead · 19/03/2017 19:16

Yep, they are wasteful idiots and I would refer to them as ex friends from now on.

Currently have two items sat right in front of me that DD has just asked me to sew- a small hole in the side seam of a skirt and adding a patch to the knee of 3yo DGS's jeans. Will add it to the similar things I've got already lined up. Combined total of all repairs should be around an hour. Replacing all of the items new would easily total £200.

plominoagain · 19/03/2017 19:17

Pillocks.

I have a very old , but comfortable sofa that must be easily 15 years old. Due to 5 kids throwing themselves bodily into it from toddlerhood until their 20s , some of the cushion zips have gone , and because it sits in a sun trap , the covers have faded . So when they needed washing this weekend , I threw a box of dye in the washing machine , and tacked the covers back together so when they need washing again I just snip the middle and job done . Sofa looks like new again, and I get to keep my comfortable old friend . Win win !

Thattwatoverthere · 19/03/2017 19:18

YANBU. If something is mendable then absolutely mend it! I've dyed plenty of clothes black when they are greying and looking old and will fix seams (mainly with wonderweb Grin) and put buttons back on. My work trousers are probably 60% dylon now but look fine.

Smaller cheaper items tend to get replaced but I'd rather buy new tights or pants due to cheapness. That's not to say that I haven't got plenty of stuff with holes in that nobody sees...

StarryIllusion · 19/03/2017 19:18

Who would waste their money buying new stuff because of a tiny hole rather than stitching it up? What idiots. I mend things all the time.

Sisinisawa · 19/03/2017 19:19

I'm a seamstress and a large portion of my work is mending things for people. I'm currently repairing an Armani coat lining.
Its daft to buy new if something can be mended and so wasteful.

diddl · 19/03/2017 19:19

WTF is Granny Blinky??

I mend stuff-who wouldn't if it's easily doable?

thenightsky · 19/03/2017 19:20

Blimey your friends are idiots and the reason this planet is so full of landfill.

Every couple of weeks I shout around the DC and DH 'right, I'm getting the sewing stuff out so bring out your mending'. Then I do everything from hanging down hems, buttons, toe holes in socks etc.

ExplodedCloud · 19/03/2017 19:20

Of course it's better to do a small timely fix than throw it away and buy new for no good reason. Financially and environmentally. You don't chuck your car away when it needs new tyres.
And they really have a cheek sneering at you whilst enjoying your hospitality.
I suggest you bin those friends and get new ones of slightly better quality Grin

Ratbagcatbag · 19/03/2017 19:22

I am totally jealous of your skills. I wish I could do even half of what you do. That said although I'm rubbish, I sorted a seam of my work trousers last week. It isn't pretty by any stretch, but it's not got a hole in it now, and I don't need to spend £20 on a new pair.

They're idiots and taking the mickey as they don't get it. How wasteful are they.

Don't think any more of it and don't invite them back.

Original poster
Blinkybell · 19/03/2017 19:22

Thanks all!

It was really embarrassing and hurtful being laughed at like that in my own house. Especially in front of DD - although by the eye rolling she gave them, she thought they were completely ridiculous.

They are very 'banter' and 'we're only having a laugh' type people. When pulled up on it they'll claim you have no sense of humour. Wasn't keen on having them to stay, they asked and we agreed against our better judgement.

We live in a popular holiday area and often get people to stay. They've been black balled now!

OP posts:
ifcatscouldtalk · 19/03/2017 19:22

Ashamed to say I can't knit and even my sewing skills are shameful. However I'd have a good go and mending myself or ask my mum. I certainly wouldn't be paying £35 for a new blazer. They sound like they have little in the way of common sense.

Topseyt · 19/03/2017 19:24

I recently replaced DD3's school kilt buttons by cannibalising DD2's old one. Your friends would no doubt ridicule me for that.

DD2 has left the school, but was a completely different size and shape, so I couldn't just pass the skirt on. I did just use what I could.

MrsChopper · 19/03/2017 19:24

See, now I wished I had a crafty friend like you that could show me how to mend and make do properly Smile

Your so called friends sound awful!

Sweetninja30 · 19/03/2017 19:24

I think you are bloody fantastic. I love to knit, and I wish I had a friend like you who could teach me to darn socks and make quilts. Nothing is quite as good as home-made. Your visiting friends should hang their heads in shame at their poor behaviour.

thenightsky · 19/03/2017 19:24

Best example I ever saw of mending was in Tanzania when I was staying with my friend who lives in a poor part of Arusha. She had a cheap pair of plastic flip-flops bought in Asda. They must have been 10 years old at least, because she moved there about 9 years ago.

She was going to throw them away, but her Maasi friend stopped her. Maasi lady took them away and brought them back a week later. Where the thong had broken off, she'd hand stitched a little square of leather underneath to re-attach the thong to. It must have taken her ages!

We were soooo impressed!

ifcatscouldtalk · 19/03/2017 19:25

*at mending myself

pringlecat · 19/03/2017 19:26

It wouldn't occur to me to darn socks or tights. But something like a seam coming undone? That's a simple and completely normal repair. YANBU.