To think that people living on welfare shouldn't be running off every five minutes for a new tattoo or piercing?

[allfurcoatandnoknickers1]

I'm probably going to get shot down for this, but I just had a little disagreement with a woman I know. She posted a photo on Facebook of a rather large tattoo on her forearm that she'd just had done. Last month she had skin divers put in her chest and hand. The month before she had another shit tattoo.
This individual is single and has two children. She hasn't worked a day in the last decade, but is living off the state. Am I being a bitch by thinking she should spend the money she receives on feeding the children and keeping a roof over their heads? I noted that she feeds her boys Pot Noodle for dinner but makes sure she's got her fags too. It just annoys me.

[HelenaDove]

WOW Some of the high rate taxpayers on here are proof that brains and common sense are two different things.

[Annesmyth123]

My kids all have the same father.

Does that make the abuse any lesser?

[BantyCustards]

Ugh - the blind misogyny here from women is truly breathtaking.

There is more than one poster here displaying the very attitudes that abusers have to justify their entitlement to treat their partners as they please and there are plenty of techniques that they employ to keep their victims in their place that are being used by posters here too.

It is utterly sickening, it really is.

[Annesmyth123]

What Banty said.

[MinimumPaymentMaximumBurrito]

I agree, banty

It's disgusting. Shame on them.

[HelenaDove]

YY Banty Its disgusting.

And some on here really need to read up about reproductive coercion.

[PortiaCastis]

I have no more words except unbelievable !!!!

[HoldBackTheRain]

OP what i would really like to say to you would be deleted by MN as I'm sure it would breach guidelines. Your comments about a bullet through the head show just the sort of person you are. Really horrible.

[PageNowFoundFileUnderSpartacus]

I've reported this thread on the basis that the persistent victim blaming of those who have suffered DV/EA is inconsistent with MN's stance on the issue.

[AwaywiththePixies27]

The thread was about benefits claimants who take advantage of teaching system

It really wasn't. It was set up so the OP could slag off her facebook 'friend'.
There is no suggestion that she's taking advantage of the system. Just that she's paying for things other benefit claimants clearly wouldn't put on the higher end of their priority list.

[Lweji]

Sorry, got interrupted before I posted this:

In Finland we have income support

There's (was?) also Income Support in the UK, as in Portugal where I live now.
It's different from Job Seeking support (whatever it's called in different places).

Job seeking support can be higher than Income Support. In Portugal, for example, it's a high percentage of the salary from the previous few years, but it can only be claimed for some time.

I do know that some people do cheat on the system, returning to work for a while (the minimum required), then back on job seeking support.

But, hell, most people would rather be in work.

There are also people, often with companies and who effectively get a good income, but who claim to have either a minimum wage salary, or somehow declare a net loss, but have a good lifestyle and receive benefits on top.
For some reason they don't tend to attract the type of anger that tattooed mums get. Maybe because they tend to keep it quiet that they get benefits.

BTW, I'm a fairly high tax payer band (certainly above average), now single mum, having gone through a DV relationship, and no tattoos. What does that make me? :)

[YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet]

Sorry to interrupt the thread, folks- we just wanted to remind everyone that we do not advocate victim blaming on Mumsnet, and link to our We Believe You campaign – please do have a read. We will remove victim-blaming posts, so please do report any of these that you see, and we will take a closer look.

Thanks
MNHQ

[iLoveCoffeeAndChocolate2017]

None of my comments were related to abuse of any kind
Benefit claimants do and can change their circumstances....
Fathers should always have to pay to their children (not leave it to taxpayers) if they leave a r/s
No one should stay with someone who isn't right for them (whatever the reason(.....

...... Don't try and twist my words so that you can have a go over something I haven't said.....

Top and bottom of it is- some people are blatantly abusing the benefits system by having no intention of giving back- it's not an income for those who can't be bothered to get a job, it's a temporary help to those who cannot work for whatever reason (unless they can't- different circumstances altogether).....
As I understood the title of this thread- it wasn't about education-? It was about people blowing benefit money on frivolities? (In their opinion) and funnily enough regarding tattoos- which I myself have seen some ppl do that too.

Everyone can have their own opinions- not a crime

[iLoveCoffeeAndChocolate2017]

P.s I was a single mother before (divorce)..... so I can see both sides! JS

[BantyCustards]

Father son should have to pay for their children....and how do you suggest that happens with only a paltry amount of income being assessed as child maintenance?

Even if 'dad' is paying the legal minimum do you really think that will even meet the monthly private rent of a second house now that the parents are separated?

[iLoveCoffeeAndChocolate2017]

.... Don't complain to me about paltry sums- I'm aware of that- but even a nominal sum is better than nothing.....

[SaorAlbaGuBrath]

I went to the CSA and they awarded me £5 in maintenance, because he was working on the side and claiming jobseekers while living with his now fiancée. He even dodged paying that! Then told me I was a gold digger and it was up to me to support my son. Thankfully DP is DS1s dad in everything but name and we make sure all our kids are provided for, but no thanks to the fucking CSA which had more holes than a colander or the prick that I married.

[DalekBred]

Agree with you too OP.

Wether working or not, children come first.

[BantyCustards]

Oh Coffee - you are yet another gaslighted: as if a paltry amount is going to prevent single mothers having to rely on benefits.

[iLoveCoffeeAndChocolate2017]

I see both sides of the picture here- and consider that more than a few here have gone off topic- and some obv trolling going on lol- enjoy

[iLoveCoffeeAndChocolate2017]

(Original thread- ppl on benefits shouldn't be running off to get tattoos and piercings every five mins).....

Yes I agree, benefit money isn't given for that purpose..... and if you have kids... Isn't a new pair of trainers or a day trip out for the children money better spent than on tattoos or piercings?! That's my point, and I'm sticking to it. I'd rather spend my money (earned or otherwise) on my kids any day of the week!

[Owlzes]

Top and bottom of it is- some people are blatantly abusing the benefits system by having no intention of giving back- it's not an income for those who can't be bothered to get a job, it's a temporary help to those who cannot work for whatever reason (unless they can't- different circumstances altogether).....

And I posted statistics before. A tiny tiny minority will never work. 2% is the figure I gave. The vast majority are using the system for short periods of time - over 80% - and the majority who are on benefits long term do so for reasons of disability or caring responsibilities which we, as a society, would be paying a fuck tonne more for if carers weren't willing to.

These mythical beings who are living it large on the legendary generosity of IDS' benefits system might excite the hell out of posters on the internet but they're a bloody awful basis for any kind of system, because they're so drastically removed from the norm. This is a made up problem to let people get self righteous on the internet.

[iLoveCoffeeAndChocolate2017]

Firstly I'm agreeing with the op who started with this thread- why? Because these so called "mythical" people you refer to exist, I personally have come across them, and I'm aggravated by their behaviour and attitudes......