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AIBU?

AIBU to change my birthday??

156 replies

Twinmummy19 · 07/12/2016 22:19

I know I can't change my birthday but I mean the day we celebrate it. My birthday is tomorrow but i want to move it to june. I am excited about tomorrow but I hate it, I hate being born close to Christmas,I hate that I can never book a table anywhere cos everywhere is full of Christmas work parties, and I really bloody hate when my DB and his DP dont send separate cards but one that says 'happy birthday-mas'. June seems such a nice time of year to celebrate a birthday,it would be nice to get all dressed up n go out without ruining my outfit by putting a duffle coat and scarf over it.
So,is it OK to ask my loved ones to celebrate with me in June or am I being weird and precious??

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Pluto30 · 08/12/2016 06:01

YABU.

Also don't understand why adults give a shit about birthdays.

DS1's birthday is December 8th, DH's is December 18th and MIL's is December 25th. None of them care or are bothered by it.

Due with this baby January 9th and not remotely worried.

MainliningChocolate · 08/12/2016 06:10

YABU. My birthday is next week and it's never been a problem. I get two presents from people who matter. I've also had a night out if I want one, friends and family make the effort as it's my birthday, just like I do with their birthdays!

TheDowagerCuntess · 08/12/2016 06:18

An 8 December birthday is really not a Christmas birthday...!

My bday is a lot closer to Christmas, and I love this time of year, it's so festive, generally.

It's summer here, which helps everything, but I honestly think adults getting all stroppy because their birthday isn't convenient / recognised enough is a bit ridiculous.

PrancerForHoney · 08/12/2016 06:27

I hear you. Mines the 16th and I have to spend it at the office Christmas dinner. Plus the usual, when do you want your present, Christmas? No. I'm not bloody Jesus! I'd quite like an August birthday for a beach bbq or something.

Mindtrope · 08/12/2016 06:27

OP you do know this is a forum for adults? Have you asked your Mum if it is OK to be posting here?

LellyMcKelly · 08/12/2016 06:32

No, my DD's birthday is in January. We celebrated it in July as there was a show she wanted to see and that was the only time we could get tickets for it. No big deal. We got a takeaway on her birthday, though.

Fiderer · 08/12/2016 06:39

I think you should celebrate whenever you want. My boys have winter birthdays, one year I was packing up one house and painting and organising the new one at the same time for weeks.

We moved the parties to a joint one in the summer and they had a giant water pistol party and BBQ. They loved it, running around the garden in swimming trunks. I loved it too, no decorating or organising games and they could invite a lot more friends than if we'd been indoors.

EnglishNotBingo · 08/12/2016 06:40

My birthday is 29th Dec. I agree, when I was a child it was awful - everyone was full broke or knackered as someone else upthread so amusingly and correctly put it!! I really disliked it. I also hated the 'here's one present for both' afterthought from relatives - who usually expected two presents for their own kids!

I quite like it now - We usually have ILs stay for Christmas- my family live abroad and i do not see them at all. And I find having the ILs quite stressy - elderly parents, requiring personal care etc. So DH and I have carved out that my birthday is our own celebration- almost like our own christmas with fizz, and snacks, and tv. I like that.

But to answer your question - you know what? Life in general can be hard and tiring. I say grab any excuse for a party with broth hands- so have another celebration for your birthday any time you like!

And HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!

EnglishNotBingo · 08/12/2016 06:40

*both

Chipperton · 08/12/2016 06:44

DH and I were having this conversation a few days ago. My birthday is in late January, everyone is usually on a diet or broke after Christmas (or both). My birthday always falls in the last week before payday in January so nobody ever wants to come out and do anything.

I'm thinking about an 'honorary birthday' in July!

GnomeDePlume · 08/12/2016 06:44

To those of you being dismissive and rude does it not occur to you, are you so lacking in empathy, to realise that while it doesnt bother you, it does bother the OP?

There are enough people agreeing with the OP to indicate that for some the date of their birthday is always an issue. Lovely for you if you/yours dont care or if your family made the effort but if your but for some their birthday has been overlooked since childhood. An entire life with their birthday a bit crap is especially galling when you see others (especially family or friends) always having their birthday marked.

Chipperton · 08/12/2016 06:49

GnomeDePlume - You are absolutely right. I made light of it in a post about my own birthday but the reality is I can't recall a birthday I've actually enjoyed in over 30 years.

As a child my birthday was always tacked on to Christmas (here's a present for both!) no fuss was ever made because there was no money after Christmas. At school and university my birthday always coincided with exams and revision and after years of this I just stopped celebrating my birthday.

Being born at the 'wrong time of year' can actually be quite horrible.

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 08/12/2016 06:50

Being born at the 'wrong time of year' can actually be quite horrible.

I agree. Especially when your other family birthdays are in the middle of the year.

swimmerforlife · 08/12/2016 06:52

I understand OP, I like my birthday even as an adult. Have two birthday, the Queen does.

If it makes you feel any better, I am born late May and it often falls on the Bank Holiday weekend. It's not great because heaps are people are away, you have to pay surcharges etc. When I was younger I also had to suffer exams on my birthday and we could never celebrate my birthday for weeks afterward as everyone was studying.

PrancerForHoney · 08/12/2016 07:00

My birthday treat as a kid was always decorating the Christmas tree on my birthday. When I lived in London it was impossible to book dinner locally unless I wanted to be lumped in with a room full of office parties. This year I have firmly told DH that my birthday and Christmas are two separate days. Like his is.

moreslackthanslick · 08/12/2016 07:01

I like my birthday but like a pp it is in April and often falls slap bang around Easter. Not next year thankfully so can have a weekend away in Europe without inflated prices that usually accompany that time of year.

I actively dislike chocolate due to being given ridiculous amounts of Easter Eggs for my birthday as a child.

So I do sympathise. Think a June birthday would be lovely, for kids as they haven't yet broken up from school and have half a chance to get a party arranged and for adults as you have a decent chance for BBQ/ pub garden weather.

PlumsGalore · 08/12/2016 07:08

But will you be knocking six months off your age or adding it on

Seriously, I don't blame you. It's hard enough trying to buy a birthday card in December for someone. The choice is crap, like three cards for Him and three for Her, that's it.

KeyserSophie · 08/12/2016 07:10

Do it. My friend was born on Christmas Day. From birth he's always celebrated his birthday on June 25th, 6 months after the event (so he was 18 months old on his first birthday).

June birthdays can be crap too though- I had GCSEs on my 16th, A-levels on my 18th and 6 hours of finals on my 21st.

EllenDegenerate · 08/12/2016 07:28

Mine is December 30th and as a child id usually have a party on June 30th or thereabouts.

I often think of resurrecting this custom but like OP worry that it would be considered strange as an adult.

However the reality is that christmas birthdays are shite and actually those with them are as entitled as those born in more favourable months to enjoy their birthdays.

Otherwise why do we bother to celebrate them at all post age eighteen?

Do it OP. Why not?

You may only get one life but thats no reason to restrict the number of birthday celebrations you have. Or indeed the season in which you celebrate

SomewhatIdiosyncratic · 08/12/2016 07:47

My friend had a Boxing Day birthday, so had a 21st 1/2 party which was very successful.

DS1 was born within a week of Christmas so we gave him an extra "half birthday" in the first few years when 6 months was a big development gap and needed new things anyway. I didn't wrap them. Now he's a bit older and has a sibling with a better date that doesn't need a half birthday (although being around the Easter season can be haphazard) there doesn't seem be much need. I have given him the option of asking for a summer celebration if he wants to do an outdoor activity in the future.

It's your birthday, so you can do what you like with it.

GnomeDePlume · 08/12/2016 08:28

SnowBodyforrrrm Three of my kids have birthdays in June. The other of my kids has his at the beginning of January. He's only 5 so we do mark his birthday in some small way.

Please do think about how you celebrate your DS' proper birthday.

As he is at school he will be starting to see that other children get their birthdays celebrated on or close to the date.

Not making much fuss of his birthday but making a fuss of his siblings' birthdays may start to hurt. This is the type of hurt that can be quite hard to express. People like some of the dismissive posters on this thread wont understand why he is upset.

At 5 it would be easy to make a big thing of his birthday without spending a lot of money: lots of balloons, banners, favourite breakfast/dinner. You can create a party atmosphere even if funds dont stretch to an actual party.

I know you are doing something special in May but January to May is a big stretch of time especially for a 5 year old.

Groovee · 08/12/2016 10:19

When I was 15, my friends handed me a present on my birthday and said "you can't open it until Christmas," The following year I gave their presents in June and July and said "you can't open until Christmas!" They never ever did that again!

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TheNaze73 · 08/12/2016 10:42

Why not have two, like the queen?

YABVU

Perp · 08/12/2016 11:03

Happy birthday twinmummy!

I have a December birthday, I have never particularly wished to change it? I don't feel birthdayish in June so it'd be weird for me but if that's how you want to play it, I don't see a problem. I hope you have a wonderful day today

Perp · 08/12/2016 11:06

Though I must add, the fact that everybody is always too skint/busy to properly celebrate my birthday can be a bit of a kick. Though I feel I've probably just got used to it.
Go for it x

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