M&S returns - was I being unreasonable?

[ChickenTinkiiev]

I bought some pyjamas from M&S for DS (aged 3) 5 weeks ago. Worn (indoors, as pyjamas tend to be) several times and washed according to instructions. Noticed a small hole had worn through one knee yesterday. Took them back with the receipt to the store, thinking pyjamas should surely last more than 5 weeks and asked for a credit note.

I was told that this could not possibly be a manufacturing fault as the hole was not along a seam, and so they could not send it back and there was nothing that could be done. Another assistant joined in and agreed with her.

I asked to speak to a manager. While waiting for a manager, the assistants had gone behind a door next to the desk and I heard one say to the other (loudly enough that I suspect she wanted me to hear) "that woman at the desk, she's definitely cut a hole in those trousers".

DH joined me at this point. Attitude of staff changes. Not sure if it is relevant but he is white (and male, obviously) and I am not; I only mention it as it's not the first time I am treated like crap alone and then suddenly better when he arrives.

The manager arrived and authorised a refund, saying send it back as a manufacturing fault. Assistant refunded me with cats bum face. I told quietly her as I was leaving that I had heard them talking; she denied everything.

I hate conflict and feel really shaken now. AIBU to have taken them back? Should I just have binned them and accepted that M&S clothes are crap quality and don't last longer than 5 weeks of occasional indoor use?

And AIBU to feel upset about being accused of deliberately damaging the clothes and lying? I know I shouldn't care what strangers think of me but it's really upset me.

[ChickenTinkiiev]

Thanks Roo - yes you're right, am done with them. I'm not a fan of forcing apologies - if they're sorry and have learned from it that's great, if not, would rather not waste their time and mine making them write a fake apology through gritted teeth and rolling eyes. I got my refund, DS is snuggled up in his (much better quality) new JL pyjamas, and I'll know where to take my business next time.

I'm really grateful for everyone who contributed to this thread - I was feeling so upset yesterday and now I don't give a shit Thank you mumsnet

[LurkingHusband]

and today ....

www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-37906466

Marks and Spencer has announced that over the next five years it will have 60 fewer clothing and home stores, of which 30 will close down.

(contd) ...

[123MothergotafleA]

Didn't I say "they're going down the pan"!
Been into our local store here last week, and it was obvious to me that something was not right, ( quality) I wasn't tempted to buy anything for me, but their children's stuff was ok,and I was tempted.
Best thing they can do is cut the crap and concentrate on maintaining standards in their food range, which I maintain has not been all that great in recent years.

[123MothergotafleA]

Sorry, too many maintains there...

[MatildaTheCat]

I was in M&S yesterday doing some returns. I also took back a pair of expensive knickers that had shredded in the wash. I had no receipt and had cut out the ( large) label. I wasn't expecting anything to be done but felt they were a design problem. The customer service lady cleared it with her manager and gave me a cash refund.

Next to me was another woman who was returning a coat she had ordered online and, as far as I could establish,had been supplied with the wrong belt. Were they helpful? No. The arguement went on the whole time I was there which was ages since my pants had to be tracked down in the lingerie department. The other woman had her receipt and I couldn't see what the problem was. Btw, she was black. I'm not.

I thought of this thread as I stood there.

[Liskee]

I was called a wanker by a sales assistant in Next once. It was under his breath as I walked away and all because I had the audacity to ask for a gift receipt after he had processed the payment. I complained and got a gift voucher and assurance that training would be given to the named member of staff (always read the name tag!!). Complain complain complain. Yes, sales assistants are people just trying to do their jobs, but if you slagged off a member of the public behind closed doors in your work (or called them a wanker as they walked away) would you not get your knuckles rapped too?!

[originalmavis]

You need training not to call customers names? I'd love to sit on on that seminar.

So, spitting in customers food, yay or nay?

No Bill, it doesn't matter if you think they are ugly. Mary, now that's not nice, you can't spell out c**t in their alphabet soup. Frank - remember the little chat we had about keeping your trousers on and parts of your anatomy covered at work (and out of the soup)?