M&S returns - was I being unreasonable?

[ChickenTinkiiev]

I bought some pyjamas from M&S for DS (aged 3) 5 weeks ago. Worn (indoors, as pyjamas tend to be) several times and washed according to instructions. Noticed a small hole had worn through one knee yesterday. Took them back with the receipt to the store, thinking pyjamas should surely last more than 5 weeks and asked for a credit note.

I was told that this could not possibly be a manufacturing fault as the hole was not along a seam, and so they could not send it back and there was nothing that could be done. Another assistant joined in and agreed with her.

I asked to speak to a manager. While waiting for a manager, the assistants had gone behind a door next to the desk and I heard one say to the other (loudly enough that I suspect she wanted me to hear) "that woman at the desk, she's definitely cut a hole in those trousers".

DH joined me at this point. Attitude of staff changes. Not sure if it is relevant but he is white (and male, obviously) and I am not; I only mention it as it's not the first time I am treated like crap alone and then suddenly better when he arrives.

The manager arrived and authorised a refund, saying send it back as a manufacturing fault. Assistant refunded me with cats bum face. I told quietly her as I was leaving that I had heard them talking; she denied everything.

I hate conflict and feel really shaken now. AIBU to have taken them back? Should I just have binned them and accepted that M&S clothes are crap quality and don't last longer than 5 weeks of occasional indoor use?

And AIBU to feel upset about being accused of deliberately damaging the clothes and lying? I know I shouldn't care what strangers think of me but it's really upset me.

[Bluntness100]

No, but honestly I'm not sure it's about the colour of your skin. I've had this shit pulled by assistants, some of them you'd think it was their money and their shop, and I'm white.

My feeling is it's female to female, and some women are simply bitches who like to behave that way and have a little power over other people. If they can make someone's day a little worse they will. Depends on their mood.

Write and complain though, what have you got to lose, and the more folks who complain about it the more chance assistants will be always nice and reasonable. Just like their taught.

[annielouise]

Agree M&S stuff gone done in quality. I bought a top from there last year. I wore it last summer and this summer perhaps once every ten days. Half way through this summer it ripped on the back as I was taking it off. Even if I'd put on weight from last year - I haven't - it shouldn't rip. The material is so thin now to save costs. Same with knickers I've had from there. Almost after first wash the elastic throughout the material started fraying. Same with a pair of DC's school socks - didn't even last a term before holes at the toes and his nails weren't that long.

[Sunshineonacloudyday]

I have never been keen on Marks and Spencer's clothes. Streetspirit that sounds awful all you wanted was a refund and there talking about a hanger. Most clothes I buy comes without the hanger.

[ILostItInTheEarlyNineties]

I think some employers that work on customer services are dreadful. Perhaps they're so bored they want to find it bit of drama in a mundane returns situation?

I was given a winter coat for my ds at Christmas which was too small. It had all the price tags on so I thought I'd try to return it to Sainsburys for an exchange. Because I didn't have a receipt, the customer service woman seemed to take great delight in accusing me of shoplifting it . She could have just refused politely. I felt like I was being judged as some sort of fraudster.

[Backingvocals]

YANBU. I had similar in Argos recently with them claiming I'd broken a two day old camera and also claiming that it wasn't broken at all . It was the aggressive tone that got me - I was shaking with fury. I got my money back but only after lodging a complaint.

I've vowed to myself never to buy anything of value in there again and use it only for cheap rubbish that doesn't matter. I'm sad that M&S is going the same route.

[ChickenTinkiiev]

Bluntness you're right, it may well have been a male thing or even had nothing at all to do with it, as the manager arrived just afterwards so maybe it was that. I will just put the facts in an email to them and let them draw their own conclusions.

[ChickenTinkiiev]

Ilostit how awful. Why can't they just be polite and professional? There is not need for the accusations and assuming the worst. It did feel like they were enjoying it, there were knowing glances / smirks between them and they were visibly annoyed when then manager told them to refund.

Sent an email now. Even DH, who is the mildest-mannered person ever, told me I needed to complain and that's saying something.

Thanks again for everyone's replies. Really appreciate it.

[MarchEliza2]

YANBU

what has happened to the quality of M&S?? I bought a cardigan less than two weeks ago, have worn it a couple of times and it is already very bobbled and losing its shape.

FYI John Lewis always have superb customer service.

[Mummyoflittledragon]

March

The quality of John Lewis own brand has gone down too. Can't comment on the customer service though as I don't shop there much.

[shinynewusername]

Write & complain, pointing out that - if the manager hadn't intervened - they would have been in breach of the Consumer Rights Act 2015 - summary here

For the 1st 6 months after purchase, any fault discovered is assumed to be a manufacturing fault unless the retailer can prove otherwise. Telling you that there was nothing they could do because the hole wasn't on a seam was a breach of the law and inexcusable from staff at a big store like M&S.

[ILostItInTheEarlyNineties]

Shmoo; they asked me if I could have climbed a ladder in the pyjamas

Ha ha what on earth? That's so absurd it's funny.

[Mummyoflittledragon]

ILostIt whaaaat?!

[LittleMissUpset]

I work in retail and never cease to be amazed at the bad service given in shops these days. I hate having to take things back.

You are right to have complained, it's very passive aggressive for them to deliberately make comments so you would hear!

I try and give good service as I know how annoying it is when people are rude

[shinynewusername]

I'm not sure this is new for M&S. Years ago, I overheard M&S returns staff telling some poor woman whose DH's brogues had fallen apart that it was his own fault, "Because everyone knows you can't wear leather soles in the rain."

[ChickenTinkiiev]

March just bought the replacement pyjamas from John Lewis I agree their customer service is excellent (on the whole - though I'm sure there are bad experiences everywhere) and I think it's worth paying a bit extra for.

shinynew thanks very much for that link, really helpful.

[ChickenTinkiiev]

Gosh this forum moves fast sorry for not replying to everyone individually - I have read all the responses and they are really helpful, so to you all for taking the time.

[Sunshineonacloudyday]

M&S clothes are not seen as fashionable I think in that department they are struggling to sell their clothes. If they are going to keep on giving customer service like that then I can't see many people flocking for their clothes.

[Sunshineonacloudyday]

John Lewis has terrible on line ordering. I ordered Christmas presents and they cancelled the order the next morning. They don't take the money the bank holds it for 5 or 7 days for them to take. If its not claimed they put the money back in. I do love John Lewis but ordering from them can be a nightmare.

[StreetSpirit]

ChickenTinkiiev No, I have to admit I didn't complain so am not practising what I'm preaching here!! I would usually have fired off a shitty email to head office but, frankly, I had bigger issues to deal with re: probate/funerals etc.

[originalmavis]

I am very heavy on my clothes - very very heavy. I've only managed to wear holes in clothes with over a years worth of frequent wearing (favourite jeans along a seam) or another pair of jeans when I tore the knee (fell over in the street rubbernecking someone climbing into a clothes bank). Other things have been caught on nails, etc or just put my elbows through jumper etc.

No way would even I put my knee through PJs in 5 weeks!

Ok, they could question gently, but to accuse you if deliberate damage? Outrageous

[JellyBelli]

YANBU, and please do complain. They used to have a policy that the assistants should not discuss the customers in that way. It promotes a cliquey atmosphere.

[Headofthehive55]

I think it's a lot to do with cheap fabric. My son age six would have holes in pjs in six weeks.

[StreetSpirit]

Good on you for sending the email.

Sorry, missed a few posts commenting on lack of hanger - I know, it really sounds ridiculous now but given the circumstances I just felt awful and wanted to get out of there.

[Notso]

It's usually really obvious if a hole is due to poor quality/thinning fabric or caused by a snag etc.

[MerylPeril]

After having an interview with M&S earlier this year (and not because I didn't get it) - they're whole attitude frankly stank and I would never work for them.
I haven't stepped inside a store since as its really changed my opinion of them. I don't hear good things from people who do work there and I think there has been a big culture change from when they were a good employer and now it's all about money.