to storm out of school with my daughter this morning?

[refinnejk]

(I have posted this in primary education too, hope that's OK)
My 8-year-old daughter is unhappy at school and I don't feel the school are offering the necessary support. After a short meeting with the 'parent liaison officer (PLO)', I said I would take her home as I wasn't happy with how the school were dealing with the situation. I am going in to meet her teacher later and I would like some advice/insight about what I should say/request/expect. I don't like being a difficult parent but I feel I have to do something to help my daughter as she is so unhappy.
Backstory - my daughter has had issues all the way through school and I would describe her as complicated. I have generally gone for the tough love option and pushed her in to school crying/screaming/sobbing on occasion. Last year she had a very unsettled year with 4 supply teachers over the year. Towards the end of the year, we arranged a meeting with the school to discuss how unhappy she was. The school was receptive, and the PLO talked to our daughter twice and moved a boy who was 'annoying' her. She seemed happier and enjoyed her meetings with the PLO. The PLO then stopped the meetings after about 2 weeks, as she thought the situation was resolved and said my daughter should just go knock on her door if she wanted to talk to her again - which I know she will not do, and I told her so. At the start of this term, she has a new teacher, an NQT who seems very nice and my daughter likes her. She was seated next to the boy who annoys her again, which I raised with the PLO, and he has swapped with another boy - who used to call her names (she didn't tell me this last year) and he elbows her to make her work a mess. Now I realise the problem is possibly/probably with my daughter, and she does need to tell her teacher - but how do I get her the support that she needs? What if she won't tell the teacher? What should I expect from the school? What do other schools do? The PLO simply says she has to tell the teacher, but she won't. if she would, I'm sure we wouldn't be in this situation in the first place. I think she is very quiet at school and doesn't like to 'tell' on other people. At home she is not at all quiet, she is often moody and unhappy. She argues constantly with her younger sister who has a completely opposite character. She has friends on our street who she loves to play with and gets on well with them. I admit to finding her difficult to deal with myself, but she can be really lovely, especially when I spend time with her on her own. Any advice would be hugely appreciated.

[kesstrel]

I am so grateful that at my primary school, we switched from tables to individual desks at age 8.

Keeping 8 year olds and older sitting round tables (which are often too small, with not enough elbow room) is an invitation to bullying.

[Mummyoflittledragon]

Fantastic news. I'm so glad your dd is getting on so well!

[refinnejk]

I will definitely be thanking the teacher in writing at the end of the year, I have already thanked her verbally. She is leaving to return to the school where she trained. This was her first year as a qualified teacher. My daughter's school has just got another 'requires improvement' from OFSTED sad
To summarise what the school did: the new teacher told me that the two boys who my daughter was always sat with were the most disruptive and most difficult to sit next to. She has had to sit with these two boys for most of her school life, presumably because she is quiet (at school) and didn't complain (directly). So the new teacher moved her to sit on a quieter, friendlier table, and hey presto, happy daughter! The teacher also kept dd back before break and lunch to check she was ok, and she did this inconspicuously - eg asked dd to collect in books so she would be last etc. She was observed by school nurse as well, but she was happy with what she saw. This simple change made a huge difference and I can't believe something wasn't done sooner. Instead I was led to believe that my daughter had a problem and it was her fault. And I did start to believe it but she is so happy and confident now. Long may it continue!