To expect an almost 14yo to be able to buy a few items from the shop without issue?

[FireSquirrel]

Asked stepson to pop to the local supermarket and get a few things for me (I have mobility issues so he often pops to shops for me, usually without issue). Gave him a list, only six things in total, all of them pretty straightforward. Noticed he was gone a bit longer than usual but assumed he was just stuck in a queue or had bumped into a friend. Eventually he reappeared with no food whatsoever, saying he 'couldn't find' a single thing on the (very short and straightforward) list! Forgetting or not being able to find the odd item I could understand, we're all human, but he claims he couldn't find a single thing on the list, not even bananas ffs! By then it was too late to go back as the shop would've been shut. Asked him why he didn't ask a member of staff (big supermarket so plenty of help about) - 'i dunno'. Asked him why he didn't come straight back and tell me, rather than hanging around for so long that by the time he did finally come back the shop was shutting - 'i dunno'. Gave him a talking to about using initiative and asking for help when needed, but feel it really shouldn't have been necessary to still be having to explain that at his age. When chatting to my DH about it later, he didn't seem to think it was a particularly big deal, and there have been similar situations in the past where he's implied that I have unreasonable expectations for my stepson and am unnecessarily harsh on him. Am I really being unreasonable to expect a 13, almost 14 year old to be able to complete a basic shopping list and to use initiative and common sense when needed, and to feel that to not do so is taking the pee?

[DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen]

Teens can be amazingly inept.

Yes

[EnquiringMingeWantsToKnow]

From my experience of DD my guess is that he was a bit crap, not very good at actually opening eyes and looking for things, and asking for help was absolutely unthinkable because he would have literally died of embarrassing. DD would have rung me to moan about my unreasonableness is sending her to do this completely impossible task though.

[KittyKrap]

One of mine was useless at that age. He'd come back with a similar thing that began with the same letter, ask for Parmesan and you'd get Primula spread - still cheesy innit?!

[DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen]

Yes, embarrassment plays a huge part in utter uselessness ime.

[tibbawyrots]

He's 14.

I reckon he went to the shop and there was a girl that he fancies in there so he didn't want to be shopping/his tummy knotted in anticipation "will she talk to me/hope she doesn't talk to me/what if she looks at me" and ended up exiting the supermarket smartish and that's why you ended up with no groceries.

Teenage angst.

[eddiemairswife]

I had a chuckle at your 'nice King Edwards' dixie. I would have to get 'a nice hearty lettuce' or a 'nice crusty loaf' when I did my Grandma's shopping over 50 years ago.

[PersianCatLady]

I would suspect that he saw someone he knew and didn't want to be seen with groceries
I don't understand what that is all about.

My son used to get well embarrassed about holding bags of groceries like they were bags of tampons or something.

Nowadays I can tell him to hold my handbag while I look for something and he willing stands there holding it whilst speaking to his friends if he sees them and he couldn't care any less.

[justilou]

Does he have problems reading? Dyslexia, perhaps?