…to think that my work should cut me a bit of slack over this

[alltoomuchrightnow]

I'm not sure, I may well be U so I'll accept general consensus here.

I am, on average, late for work about once a month but never more than five or ten minutes, apart from the week before last I had a mini crisis (won't go into detail as don't want to out self) and was 25 minutes late.

Rang boss as soon as I got in and she was fine about it.. totally understanding. However roll on a few days and she changed her tune and started grilling others as to why I was late (even though she knew why I was - I was upset as was obviously trying to catch me out? as to my reasons? ) which surprised me. It's a shop and I'm the one opening so I can understand her reaction but as she said..it's extremely quiet first thing (and I opened late to make up for lost time..) and not like I do this all the time (her words)

Re being occasionally 5-10 minutes late is because I come a very rural way and there's often roads closed/diversions , bad accidents (cars speeding and crashing on long lanes), hold ups with horses, tractors, cyclists etc. I always give myself longer than I need to get in (because of aforementioned) but some things can't be predicted for the 20 mile journey, no matter how early I leave

Re cutting me some slack… I don't get any breaks at work whatsoever. I don't get paid for an hour's lunch I'm meant to have each day. Boss fully aware of this (its the same for my job share, whom I don't work with). I am not allowed to leave shop or to leave colleagues alone. I have been told that there's no reason for me to ever leave the shop in opening hours. It can be stressful if I need to nip to bank/shops whatever or to make a phone call (as I get no signal at work) as I can't, but most of the time I just suck it up as I have no choice (I can't just sneak out..am on camera and boss will often watch..she works from home) . I wouldn't mind if I was paid for the full day as I'm used to, in my employment history of retail, usually not having breaks. If I had an unpaid break (or was paid for the full day without a break) then I guess I wouldn't be asking this… I would agree I was being unreasonable and being late (for whatever reason) is unprofessional and annoying

I also stay late nearly every night as there's so much to do after closing, including cleaning which I do all myself (don't get paid for after hours but it has to be done…I'm used to this as a manager though as pretty much the norm everywhere I've worked)

The last few weeks I've also not been getting in early , reason being because of not wanting to be away from home any longer than have to (DP having had a massive bereavement, also having a sick pet) but I still leave late each night. I should stress that this isn't me making a stand (not getting in early) because of the no breaks. They would like me in every day 15 -20 minutes early BEFORE I open up but I get everything done and ready the night before. Given what's going on at home and the no breaks situation I guess I justified it to myself to get in dead on time (or a few minutes early usually) rather than early. Nothing's been said about this though I'm sure it will be soon (and from this week I'll start coming in early again but that's the choice I've made for myself)

But the main issue being she is angry over me being 25 minutes late (and also if it comes up that I've been in mainly on time each day rather than early) when initially she was fine about it. So..should she cut me some slack because a/ I had good reason to be late that day and b/ because I work through my break, unpaid, every day ??

I'm not trying to be difficult and say, well if I'm late just call it my lunch break! I'm just wishing there'd be some balance. Of course I want the shop to open on time each day as it will reflect badly on me. But sometimes things happen and re the breaks they are being illegal

[4littlemonsters]

Good lord where has this BM had training?? I'm guessing nowhere.

It's not appropriate to obtain 'feedback' in this manner.

Write Everything down, diarise it, keep emails and messages.

Go to CAB or a regional manager or HR. Sounds like you have grounds for a grievance.

Good luck

[alltoomuchrightnow]

4little, she hasn't, as never worked in retail before
She is obsessed with feedback and says she has more volunteers to get through and expects more to come to light (of what she doesn't say! )
She is 'HR' although she doesn't do any HR. She's a one woman team. She can't cope with anything. I certainly can't go to her when she's partly the cause. Her admin support left (although still in company ) who was in theory her HR

[alltoomuchrightnow]

I will see what happens tomorrow and if there's any snippy notes left for me as I'm certain she was in the shop today
That will clinch it
I would probably say when resigning that I have stress and depression and not elaborate. They can work it out for themselves. (and I wouldn't be lying)Some of that is not work related but the majority of it definitely is
DP is away for ten days and I feel really alone
He wants me to leave but ONLY if I have another job to go to
I feel too depressed and demoralised to look seriously (that's not an excuse! just how it is) though am checking a place out on Friday that needs someone (similar field)

[alltoomuchrightnow]

I wish DP could just say 'don't worry , just leave and we'll worry about the rest later' I really envy people who can do that .. we can't afford to… it puts me in a position where I'll feel guilty if I leave.. both to DP and to the fundraising I do… and letting down the nice people there..but am end of tether…wish I just had the money to say stuff it but we are skint

[SouperSal]

I would probably say when resigning that I have stress and depression and not elaborate.

Don't do this.

[alltoomuchrightnow]

ok Souper, why? Am open to advice!

[HelenaDove]

Postchildrenpregranny Thu 07-Jul-16 10:45:09
My DD is an NHS worker and yes rarely gets a proper break (or even get to the loo)
But the difference is someone might die if she insists on her break .



I do see what you mean by this but i do hope the loyalty will work both ways if she ever gets kidney stones.