AIBU to be upset at MIL offer?

[LittleReindeerwithcloggson]

I have a 7 year old DD (who I will call Lily here) and an 8 year old niece (who I will call Daisy)
Lily is very sporty. Plays county level at tennis, is above average for her age swimmer and is on the club gymnastics squad. Daisy hates sports but is very musical. Plays violin and clarinet at grade 5 level and plays in the school orchestra.
MIL does not say much about Lily's achievements but is constantly praising Daisy. She has now offered to pay all fees for Daisy to go to an expensive private school so she can concentrate more on music. She has 8 other grandchildren (including Daisy and Lily's own siblings) but is only offering to pay for her. Am I BU to be upset about this?

[Atenco]

"minifingerz"

I share your desire to see more funding and attention paid to children that are struggling with the education system, but I disagree when you say that motivated and hard-working children do not need support.

[JessicaRabbit3]

It's not your place to question how MIL spends her money. My parents give accordingly depending on what comes up and their age. It might be your MIL might pay for a school trip for your DD or something else that comes up at the time. If you question it you would come across a bitter.

[cingolimama]

there are plenty of chances to do sport and music outside school and there are massive numbers of people making a success of careers in these sectors who have come through the state sector

Sadly, mini, that simply isn't true anymore about music. The vast majority of music students who make a career of it are educated privately.

[WellErrr]

It's not your place to question how MIL spends her money.



It kind of is when what she wants to spend it on is a private school place for one of OP's children.

[Xenadog]

To me this is simple favouritism. It's already been mentioned up thread that the musician will get an all round better education (not just with music) if she does attend a private school and, as a teacher in a private school who has also taught in state schools, I wholeheartedly agree.

I think the correct thing for the grandmother to do (if she wants to support one child) is pay for music lessons for the musician and club membership or sports coaching for the sporty grandchild along with offering something similar for the other grandchildren.

We have favouritism in out family where the ILs favour their daughter's child over ours. I expected it TBH but I can't say I don't find it annoying.

[AmysTiara]

Well no they don't. It's the op's niece