To think that 16 month old needs direct supervision by the pool?

[cluelessnewmum]

Currently on holiday with DH and 16 month old DS, this is the first holiday we've been on when DS is walking.

DH has a different parenting style to me, alot more laid back. He thinks that it is OK to let DS play by the pool (ie right next to it, well within falling in distance) whilst he is about a metre away on a sun lounger, where as I think that if he is going to be that near the pool he needs someone right next to him.

I should say that DS has been taken to swimming lessons from a very young age so does seem to understand that the pool is water and he shouldn't go in, he seems to have good safety awareness, but in my opinion anyone could still slip and fall, he could drop a toy in there and reach too far to get it etc.

DH has just got annoyed with me for saying that we need to take it in turns supervising him when he plays by the pool.

WIBU? How does everyone else manage the taking it in turns thing supervising their young ones on holiday? I'd like to leave DH to it when he is looking after him and I don't want to micromanage which is why I ask the question...

[Footle]

Every summer French TV runs public information ads on pool safety. This is the sound of a child drowning - silence. The statistics for children drowning are still pretty grim. The pool needs to be covered at all times if an adult is not actively watching the child.

[MrsSpecter]

"Yes, let him play on the cliff edge, you'll hear him scream if he goes over.

Sure if he pulls the kettle all over himself, you can take a few steps over to him if he is scalded.

No need to stay near him by a busy road, the screech of brakes will alert you if he gets in front of a car."

Not comparable risks.

You are over reacting.

[edwinbear]

YABU to not have a swim vest on him. It only takes a second for you to go to the loo, your DH to look for the sun cream in the bag, him to wander off and slip in. DS is nearly 7 and dd nearly 5, they have both had lessons twice a week since 12 weeks old and competent in the water, but on holiday they must wear their swim vests unless a parent is one on one in the pool with them.

[edwinbear]

By swim vest, I mean one of those flotation jacket things.

[EveryoneElsie]

If he decides to make a dash for the pool he will be in it before DH can react.

[RussianDolls]

Yes. You and your DH need to take turns. Google Drowning doesn't look like drowning and show this to your DH. It is a site by Mario Vittone.

[RussianDolls]

"Yes, let him play on the cliff edge, you'll hear him scream if he goes over.

Sure if he pulls the kettle all over himself, you can take a few steps over to him if he is scalded.

No need to stay near him by a busy road, the screech of brakes will alert you if he gets in front of a car."

Not comparable risks.

You are over reacting.

No she is not.

[DoinItFine]

Yes, they are absolutely comparable risks.

A baby who falls into a pool might not die.

But they might well, even if their Dad manages to get to them in secinds and to fish them out easily.

Deep water is lethally dangerous to small children and only a complete idiot would let a 16 month old play by the edge of a pool without being right beside them.

Someone on this thread suggested it would be a good learning exoerience for a baby to fall into a pool. There are not enough s in all the world for that level of gobshitery.

Sure a little bit of drowning never kilt anyone.

Oh, except it does. Regularly.

And no, armbands or floating vests don't make it any safer. You can still drown while floating on the top.

[SoftSheen]

Well... I have a 16 month old DS (PSB!) and I simply wouldn't let him play near a pool at all. 'Relaxing by the pool' type holidays just aren't compatible with having a young toddler.

Take the toddler swimming, and take turns at having a proper swim yourselves. Then go somewhere else where the toddler can play in a safer environment, and you don't need to be (quite) so vigilant and can actually relax a bit.

[specialsubject]

just to make sure everyone knows; if anyone falls in the water and is unconscious or even gets a lungful, they need to go to hospital even if they seem fine. Secondary drowning.

[DoinItFine]

How is he going to drown with his father one metre away?

Please never be in charge of any small children near water.

[MrsSpecter]

Yep, still over reacting. No not comparable risks.

[XiCi]

What do you mean he is playing by the side of the pool. You mean you just leave him to totter around by the edge of the swimming pool while you sunbathe? When dd was that little one of us played in the pool with her or we were off doing something else child appropriate. There's 2 of you, just take it in turns to supervise him

[SoftSheen]

How is he going to drown with his father one metre away?

Some 16 month olds are pretty fast and determined, and one metre could become several in a matter of seconds.

A toddler this age, who will be physically quite capable yet highly impulsive, unable to understand/remember instructions and with no awareness of danger, should not be next to a pool unless an adult is actually holding their hand.

[edwinbear]

DoinIt is absolutely correct that if a baby falls in, even with arm bands or a swim jacket, they can find themselves floating face down. I take my nearly 7 & 5 year old to the pool to do a buoyancy check on theirs before we go on holiday every year, to adjust the floats in theirs to ensure they float head up, but it's no guarantee. At 16 months their heads are still top heavy and they still have a tendency to topple whilst filling up their watering cans etc.

[DoinItFine]

Cars usually try to stop to avoid hitting children who run out into the road.

If there is even a car coming.

Pools do not make any effort not to drown babies who fall into them.

"Fishing" a slippery baby out of a po it has already taken you a few seconds to reach is not necessarily going to be easy.

How close to the edge is he?

Do you need to get in?

If so, jumping is risky, but anything else is wasting precious seconds and you're already down 3.

How good are you at getting hold of a slippery body in water? Will you definitely get a good grip first time?

More seconds ticking away if not.

Meanwhike your baby has had plenty of time to inhale water.

Trained in CPR? Let's hope so, there is no guarantee this babybwill be breathing after being "fished out".

It is just a fucking stuoid risk to take.

Stay near your bareky perambulatory child while they are on the edge of a steep drop into deep water.

[specialsubject]

the only thing that keeps an unconscious or immobile person floating face up is a properly certified life jacket. Armbands, buoyancy aids, float coats just mean you float the way you fall in.

[XiCi]

In answer to your question, we would take it in turns to be in the water with Dd when we were at the pool. There is no way either of us would be on a sun lounger while she was by the side of the pool at that age. To me that's just dangerous and stupid

[DailyFaily]

How can your child permanently be one metre away though? Surely he isn't just sat there inert (and, if he is, then just move him 1 metre closer - voila!). I'm amazed you have a toddler who doesn't demand his attention every two minutes anyway, I'm sure that mine wouldn't let me relax on a lounger for more than, oh, 10 seconds - that's just holidaying with a toddler though.

[littleshirleybeans]

We always go to villas with our two ds. A few years ago when ds2 was a toddler, possibly 3 or so, I can't quite remember, we were on holiday.
We never ever let them outside without one of us. That evening, I was walking along with ds2 beside the pool, it was a lovely evening and dh was standing around.
I was holding ds2's hand when all of a sudden, he disappeared!
He'd missed his footing and fallen in, while he was right beside me holding my hand!
He came right back up and I pulled him out, it happened in seconds, he got such a fright.
The water was cold and he'd gone right under. He knew that dh and I were both right beside him and ready to jump right in, but that didn't stop him from crying for ages and feeling really scared.
That incident confirmed to me that you really cannot take your eyes off them at all.
Holidays are not restful with little ones, someone has always got to be on duty.
YANBU

[FATEdestiny]

Why is the toddler playing by the poolside?

Is there nowhere safer to play?

[beetroot2]

I get you but YAB a bit U.

He's 1m away and watching. You are near a pool and you can't tie the child to the bed Does he have arm bands on?