Neighbour scolded me about washing out in the front

[OrangeSplot]

Hello.

I'm feeling a bit stung and embarrassed.

We rent in a close. A few retired homeowners take care of the communal area (off their own back - do the gardens etc but I think our LL pays for lawn to be cut etc).

My neighbor just told me that I should dry my washing at the back as its "not nice for the neighbours".

Incidentally, my DH hung washing out front yesterday as the stand was there from kids playing and was sunny.

I was a bit taken aback - although I know/suspect they look down on us for having toys in our front lawn etc and more weedy than theirs. I can imagine it's not ideal but you just accept that you have a neighbour with lower aesthetic standards than you, surely?

If it's relevant I was told off last year because my friend had left her car in the communal grounds (not obstructing etc, just parked) for about 2/3 days because she ended up getting a taxi home. Another neighbor had a real go at me about it disrespecting the neighbours etc. It's just a car in my eyes, it was removed on day 3 or 4 I think.

I said little because I didn't want to say 'yes of course'. And I didn't want to argue so I just said 'I'll think about what you said' and I think I may have uttered 'I think it's an unreasonable request'. She said 'Well, , if you don't hang your washing out the back, I think you should know that it will be taken further'.

I just feel upset. It's not nice to have upset from neighbours. I'm polite and friendly and my kids play with their grandkids happily.

Is she being unreasonable or am I?

[lazyarse123]

My back garden is a perfect sun trap all day and consequently the houses over the road have the sun in front of theirs. At least two of them put clothes airers in the front. NOT A PROBLEM, everyone has to wash knickers and getting them dry free is a bonus . Tell her to mind her own business(although i would weed it just so it looks nice). Also the car is nobody's business either if it's a public road.

[paxillin]

The neighbours of a friend were annoyed at a quiet 30-something couple opening doors and walking in the evening and complained a lot. My friend was endlessly picked on about exactly where the bin goes and what to do with washing... she eventually gave up and moved.

A large and rowdy student crowd moved in after my friend moved out. I rubbed hands every time I walked past thinking how these hyper-picky neighbours had brought this on themselves. They lost the unwanted laundry but gained beer cans and fag ends as well as music and lots of people.

[BlueJug]

It is a question of respect. Self respect - you don't display baggy knickers and greying bra's for the world to see. Respect for others - you don't turn a pleasant shared space into your private midden. Simple.

You don't allow friends who don't live there to leave cars there for four days.

You'd be the first to complain if they were playing loud music or sunbathing in "inappropriate" attire or doing anything which you found impacted on your enjoyment of the space.

Shared space is precisely that - shared - so you don't abuse that. Not difficult.

[OurBlanche]

It is EXTREMELY rare that a property would have a restrictive covenant on the lease regarding what you can use outside space for, let alone whether or not you can hang washing!

This simply is not true... it is quite a common, if rarely enforced, by law.

www.getreading.co.uk/news/local-news/outdoor-washing-line-hanging-offence-4048726 fire regulations in this case but many new developments have similar Community Living clauses.

Many cities and towns also have bye laws too. Fortunately few councils enforce them (or, in our case, even know they are still in place).

Just because most people don't know about them or disregard them doesn't mean they aren't there. OP needs to check or her NN could make her life a bit of a misery.

[SocialDisaster]

I'd be astonished if I saw washing out at the front - and assume some sort of mental illness.

Of which mental illness is that a symptom?

My guess is a new illness called Superior pearl clutching Judgey pants syndrome.

[AmyInTheBoonies]

I may be Hyacinth Bucket but really it's looks awful having washing at the front. I really don't want to see my neighbour's greying underpants etc. It just looks scruffy/rough.

But.... if it's not in the deeds that you can't do it I concede it's up to your neighbour to live in an estate where it's not allowed if they are the house proud types.

[dolkapots]

I drove into a very small close recently and everyone had a settee in their front gardens. It was all very cosy

For reasons that I can't really articulate I don't like washing in the front (unless it is obscured from view) however I would never complain about it but I would be counting the no of washes per week

For full affect OP you need and old sofa in the front, sit is said sofa in dressing gown/hair rollers shouting abuse at your young 'uns. Oh, remove one of your car wheels and put it up on bricks in a very inconvenient communal parking area.

[Stratter5]

Washing out front looks horrible

[BombadierFritz]

Dolkapots
Its all very Shameless

[ppeatfruit]

How interesting, that some posters think that the unnecessary use of tumble dryers all the time and the effect of spraying weeds is so unimportant compared to the 'appearance ' of a road.

FGS there is nowhere else for the bees to go except the urban areas in some parts of England.

[ImperialBlether]

You have a back garden, don't you? Why don't you put the washing there? And your friend should have moved the car if it's an area where residents usually park. Parking causes the most dissent between neighbours and you need to try to avoid problems where you can.

And do your front garden, too! You've got two adults in the house; surely between you you could tidy it up?

[TheFairyCaravan]

you don't display baggy knickers and greying bra's for the world to see

Don't judge everyone on your own standards. I don't own, let alone peg out, any baggy knickers or greying bras.

[dolkapots]

Bluejug speak for yourself, I personally don't own any baggy knickers or greying bras

[RobinsAreTerritorialFuckers]

blue, I think if your knickers and bras are grey and sagging, you should perhaps consider nipping down Tesco for a value pack of new ones, rather than commenting on other people's lack of 'self respect'!

Some people are better at live and let live than others - but it's a valuable skill, and I bet those who judge neighbours' music or washing or gardening aren't likely to find many willing people who'll take in parcels for them or similar. Good relations with neighbours also bump up the value of a street, IME.

[RobinsAreTerritorialFuckers]

Clearly we all thought the same think there!

[dolkapots]

Cross post fairy. I hardly wear a bra which is why they never get a chance to grey

[Iwantacampervan]

It is one of our covenants not to hang washing in the front as well as no front fences (hedges are OK) - the cul de sac was built in the 1960s. We all have back gardens to dry washing - I do sit out at the front as it gets the evening sun

[ppeatfruit]

Ex dil rents in a posh part of N london, She has no back garden but a small front one (no fences). The rules are extraordinarily intrusive.-

No washing hanging outside,

No machines to be used after 8pm .

No high heels to be worn in the upstairs flats (there are only 2 floors ; ground floor and upstairs flats).

Even worse is, her upstairs neighbour has asked her to keep her blind down in the daytime "because she doesn't want to see into her bedroom" (It's tidy btw)

Though it's possible to hear her talking on the phone ,dragging her chairs across the floor etc. No insulation in the flats at all.

[ppeatfruit]

Oh oh AND the outside garden furniture HAS to be dark green or brown and not be able to 'fly away' in windy weather FGS.

[hollinhurst84]

Crazy - mine does! I own and have the only garden in the 4 flats and I'm not allowed to put washing in it

[SquigglePigs]

sorry for off topic but ifailed - do you know where you can get that gnome - it's awesome!

[NewLife4Me]

I have never seen anything prohibiting anything in a front garden, in the deeds to our houses. We have lived all over the place and this is a nw one on me.
Not saying I don't believe folk though

I think you should do what you want to tbh and it's nothing to do with anyone else.
I'd carry on as you are and if she says anything else about taking it further etc, ask her what she means.

[Alisvolatpropiis]

Washing out the front would make me look a bit askance. I suppose because I have never seen it in the uk.

[hollinhurst84]

I should add mine is a back garden and still not allowed washing in it

[OrangeSplot]

This is really bothering me considering I'm checking MN from a beach....

I'll check tenancy agreement. I'm pretty sure it was sparse so if anything, it will be if anywhere.

Thanks for variety of comments and thoughts. I guess opinion is divided.

As mentioned, this was a one off.
I feel opinions can vary but policing neighbours isn't fair (IF It's a free and legal non offensive practice!).

The front part of grass is only a bank approximately 2/3 metres by one metre.

I should probably go and build more sandcastles.

Thanks for advice. I do agree pleasant relations are better and have no real need to hang laundry out front generally.

Hopefully will die way but will leave a bitter taste.

I don't see clean laundry as offensive or skanky. I don't think I would be too interested in staring at people's underwear to see what state it's in.

I have self respect and I have respect for neighbours. I welcome her grandkids into my garden. I chat & invite another neighbour to tea and give emotional support. My last neighbour (old lady), I used to take her car round often and sit for a chat as she was lonely and buy her Xmas presents. I helped another old neighbour walk home when she was struggling with two toddlers last week. They're neighbours I helped, not friends. Therefore I guess I take pride in being a good neighbour in ways that I see fit , rather than wanting to conform to values that I consider as less important in the grand scheme of things.

I'll tidy up the front patch. I honestly don't know how. There were so many blue bells I don't know what to pull out and what not to.