Neighbour scolded me about washing out in the front

[OrangeSplot]

Hello.

I'm feeling a bit stung and embarrassed.

We rent in a close. A few retired homeowners take care of the communal area (off their own back - do the gardens etc but I think our LL pays for lawn to be cut etc).

My neighbor just told me that I should dry my washing at the back as its "not nice for the neighbours".

Incidentally, my DH hung washing out front yesterday as the stand was there from kids playing and was sunny.

I was a bit taken aback - although I know/suspect they look down on us for having toys in our front lawn etc and more weedy than theirs. I can imagine it's not ideal but you just accept that you have a neighbour with lower aesthetic standards than you, surely?

If it's relevant I was told off last year because my friend had left her car in the communal grounds (not obstructing etc, just parked) for about 2/3 days because she ended up getting a taxi home. Another neighbor had a real go at me about it disrespecting the neighbours etc. It's just a car in my eyes, it was removed on day 3 or 4 I think.

I said little because I didn't want to say 'yes of course'. And I didn't want to argue so I just said 'I'll think about what you said' and I think I may have uttered 'I think it's an unreasonable request'. She said 'Well, , if you don't hang your washing out the back, I think you should know that it will be taken further'.

I just feel upset. It's not nice to have upset from neighbours. I'm polite and friendly and my kids play with their grandkids happily.

Is she being unreasonable or am I?

[liz70]

I'd be tempted to get some cheapo huge granny pants, rag them and put some dubious fake stains on them with black tea, chocolate etc., then hang them out in full view to horrify your neighbour even more.

[SeamstressfromTreacleMineRoad]

I'll send my neighbours over - they have karaoke and BBQ sessions in their front garden in the summer...
I'm not a fan, but they don't carry on late into the evening, and the BBQ is away from anyone's windows, so we all live and let live..!

[FloweryTwat]

My DM spends far too much time in a state of abject horror because SIL puts her clothes in the window at the front of the house so people can see them.

It must be a thing - strangers gazing at your washing.

That said, I would put it in the back garden if you have one as that's private whereas the front is public. Would I ever complain about someone doing it? No absolutely not!

[var123]

I wouldn't like it, TBH. I can't imagine saying anything but it sounds like the neighbours are frustrated about a few things.

[thejerkstorecalled]

I think yadnbu. Your neighbour is being uptight, mean and rude. Maybe try to forget about it - don't let her ruin your day by making you feel bad! Just be polite but frosty in future.

[cansu]

I bet you anything she wouldn't be making these veiled threats about taking it further if you owned the house. She is trying to boss you around because you are renting your house. This kind of shit pisses me off. I would continue to put my washing wherever I wanted. Next time call her on her comment.unless there is a clause in your tenancy agreement you can out your washing wherever you want.

[var123]

more likely there is a clause in the house deeds, if its written anywhere

[ClashCityRocker]

On the search we did when buying our house it said that we weren't allowed to hang washing at the front.

Dunno why.

We never have as we don't have a clothesline at the front.

[RaptorInaPorkPieHat]

This will age me, but I remember an interview of Les Dawson in the 80's where he was talking about him and his first wife moving to a more affluent area when his career had just taken off.

Not long after they moved in, she got a phone call from a neighbour saying that her washing line was 'visible' and it wasn't really the done thing in that area.

She gathered up every single possible bit of laundry and strung up multiple visible washing lines

[SocialDisaster]

Washing in the front garden isn't standard practice in England. I would raise an eye brow and scratch my head over a neighbour doing this. I wouldn't get my knickers in a twist over it.

I take it you had no smalls on display out there?

[Nanny0gg]

How long are you planning to live there?

[Kwirrell]

I have lived on a huge Council Estate for 40 years. Each house has a 2 metre paved area in front of the house. This is the first year I that some residents have started puttting their washing there.

I do not why I don't like it, but I don't. I guess it is like if I went to their house and they had washing In the living room. No reason why they shouldn't. Maybe it is an old fashioned idea. I would never say anything though.

[Janecc]

Sounds like you stick out not just because you're renting but also because of your age. If the washing thing is in the deeds, you can't do it and if the car space you friend used has certain restrictions placed on it, maybe they were also right. As you are renting, you don't know the rules and I would contact your letting agent or the owner for clarification. Other than that, I think it's more the way it was said than what was said regardless of who is in the right.

[notagiraffe]

How bored is your neighbour? If she realises you won't change your ways just because she tries to bully you, will she back off, or will she enjoy a good stand off?

[AnotherTimeMaybe]

Initially I thought yabu as there has to be respect both sides and also some areas are really strict especially conservation areas etc.... Till you made the comment about the car

[ppeatfruit]

Leave the weeds alone and they grow into 'proper' plants, herbs, flowers etc. (you could just pull out the ones that are choking them) . I have a 'wild life' garden which needs weeds as do the birds, bees etc. If everything were completely weed free we'd not have any wild life left.

The neighbours are neurotic about it though .

[BennyTheBall]

I wouldn't like to see your washing at the front of your property - it looks skanky.

But I am an inveterate snob.

[OurBlanche]

Washing out front is often covered by local bye laws, often it is not to be visible from the front of the building, including through windows!! - check and see what is in your contract and what is in place locally.

Non resident leaving a car in the communal car park is usually a grave sin, it leaves the space open to being used by anyone who likes the look of the space; takes the favourite space of A N Other or simply DOES NOT BELONG!!

So you could have been VVU indeed!

Can you tell I was the Secretary for a block of mixed tenant flats for many years

[SocialDisaster]

I left my garden too so the Quern Bee had some nectar to start the year. My garden is teaming with wildlife. I am not popular with neighbours in Spring. I don't care.

[ApocalypseNowt]

I'd definitely go for the deckchair fags and cider approach now. Set up a bbq and play music out the front as well grin

I am literally doing this right now (well, i have a beer rather than cider).

To be fair we live in terraces, no-one has a back garden so people sit, play, hang washing, bbq, etc in the front. We are all coping remarkably well.

[RobinsAreTerritorialFuckers]

I find this odd. And it's not true that 'in England' washing out front isn't the done thing - what a bizarre claim! If you look at a lot of terraced houses in the North-East, they are in rows with communal washing lines down the grass strip in between - so everyone has washing to the front of them.

[PigletJohn]

borrow mine

[ppeatfruit]

Me too SocialDisaster There are more birds here now than for the 10 years we have lived here. That is mainly down to the banning of the bee killing sprays in France where we live 50% of the time.

[abisothergran]

My advice would be to tell your neighbour to take it up with your husband if he was the one who hung it at the front.