No no to breastfeeding by private GP

[AnotherTimeMaybe]

Ok so last weekend I ended up with a bacterial infection, don't want to be too graphic but throat a mess, nose a mess etc. GP had no emergency appointments left, waited for Saturday in case it got better, out of hours and urgent care out of question cause of long waiting so ended up to a private Bupa GP for diagnoses and treatment. He prescribed antibiotics to which I asked if they are OK for breastfeeding. He asked the age of the baby, I said 18 months and he literally freaked out..."you can't do that hes a toddler". I've asked him what he means, this child is eating solids, I breastfeed for his comfort in the night etc to which he replied "give him a dummy then but not that..."
He was quite categorical, I got defensive - I should have been more assertive but I was feeling rough and I felt he caught me by surprise
I honestly didn't like his attitude as I didn't go there for pediatric or breastfeeding advice. I felt my own GP would have never ever said something like this! This chap was trying to impose his personal views on me in an odd way when clearly that wasn't his position to do so and till now I'm thinking of reporting this. Not sure though I want to cause him trouble, maybe I should just suck it up that certain professionals just don't agree with it over a certain age . But still isn't this a choice?
AIBU to feel a bit hurt by this reaction and WWYD?

[AnthonyPandy]

CandyCrusher

I don't need to drive my 16 year old to school but I do it sometimes because it makes us both happy.

I don't need to go on Mumsnet, I managed perfectly well before it was invented. But I like it so I do it.

Just because we don't need to do something (which is debatable with bf, there are many many arguments to say infants do need it at that age) doesn't mean we shouldn't.

[HowBadIsThisPlease]

Yes, report him. Because doctors give out advice which is taken very seriously and he is badly informed.

WHO guidelines

"Exclusive breastfeeding is recommended up to 6 months of age, with continued breastfeeding along with appropriate complementary foods up to two years of age or beyond."

I think Islam suggests that mothers should breastfeed to 2, incidentally? Which means that his horrified bad advice would have severe religious implications for some women

[Writerwannabe83]

I don't breastfeed my toddler for "bonding reasons" I breast feed him because of the continued health benefits to us both.

[AnthonyPandy]

ParadiseCity Fri 06-May-16 11:13:3
If you went to a doctor and they said they didn't like your hairstyle, or you should change your car, or don't play golf it is boring, you wouldn't think 'oh you're entitled to your opinion' you'd think 'where the fuck do you get off criticising me like that?!'

THIS

[DataColour]

That reminds me spiderlight of when I went with DD (12 months at the time) to get the MMR vaccination for her and the nurse asked if she was being breastfed to tick the box on her sheet. When I said yes, she said "oh what a lucky girl!"

[AnotherTimeMaybe]

Problem is that it's bad enough I get the odd comments/looks from NCT mates cause I still have to do it, I get the dodgy look from my boss cause I can't go on business trip cause of this, I get the lovely comment from FIL that I should put hot peeper on my breasts to put baby off, I get lovely comments from colleague that he ll help me get over it and now this.. Constant nagging doesn't do wonders for your confidence or MH state!

[FutureGadgetsLab]

Another tell anyone commenting on your breastfeeding that it isn't any of their business.

I don't understand why people get wound up about other people breastfeeding. I only breastfed for a short period of time, so what? We each do what works for us.

[Solo]

Shepherdessy I too had your attitude regarding extended breastfeeding although mine was a cut off point of 2 years, not 6 months. I was quite rightly put in my place which was just as well as my Dd went 4 years and 10 months at the breast. It really is between a mother and her child and the opinions of other people are irrelevant.

I did have my health visitor telling me that my then 20 month old should have finished with that by now (also a question relating to medication) which took me by surprise, but op, you asked the GP a question about the meds, you didn't ask his opinion on breast feeding and I think I would consider taking it further if you have the energy. I hope you are feeling better

[Isoundlikeahousewife]

Clicked on this.

I'm a GP and am utterly horrified by your experience. I'm also an extended breast-feeder (age 4). It is arrogant ignorance on that GP's part. I intensely dislike slating colleagues but this I will slate.

The thing to remember is 'what does he know'. And the other thing is your breastfeeding choice is a parenting choice, not a medical choice. Unless GP training has dramatically changed, we have no traing in parenting, and we are not parenting experts.

So sorry for the experience you had.

[AnotherTimeMaybe]

Thanks guys comments help massively

[squizita]

Find out who he works for (or even your healthplan), complain and link to the WHO guidelines (moreover, ask directly what harm it does, even if not needed? If it offers the child a little comfort?).

Also, GPs are usually required by their surgery to listen to and respect their patients' lifestyles (if they're not harmful) so this is a major fail, BF itself aside.

[greenlizard]

Hi. I know the medical director in BUPA who says he would like to investigate this as is not what they would expect. If you want him to look at it - PM me the GP's name and I can pass it on. If not he encourages you to take it up with BUPA.

GL

[NameChange30]

Personally, I would go through the official complaints route rather than Mumsnet PM

[TinyTear]

Another I breastfed my eldest until 3y2m, then went to hospital and had the youngest so haven't stopped in over 4 years...

I managed some business trips from when she was about 18 months - just for one night at a time (sometimes 2 if I got home too late after her bedtime)
I just took a hand pump and did a quick pump and dump in the hotel in the evening and all worked fine... I had a trip about once every 3 months...

[shiveringhiccup]

Yes definitely complain (if you're better and feeling up to it!). I'd be tempted to send copies of the complaint to both the individual practice and also to Bupa. As pps have said you could put in a copy of the WHO guidelines if you felt it would help back you up.

Also - what antibiotics did he give you? Was he careful to give you ones that are compatible with BFing?

[shiveringhiccup]

www.breastfeedingnetwork.org.uk/wp-content/dibm/antibiotics-oct-14.pdf

[Winterdaisy]

Don't world health organization (WHO) recommend 2 years???? Plus?
Anyway ignore him he sounds out of touch (perhaps why he is private).
Check with phamasist if your antibiotics are safe or not though.
Btw I work in paediatrics and we have doctors and nurses (mostly nurses) who BF for 3 years. Not all health workers have the same views X

[APlaceOnTheCouch]

He was wrong.

I wonder if he was worrying about the fact he prescribed antibiotics without first checking if you were breastfeeding/pregnant/allergic? And that his response came from defensiveness.

It's not uncommon for GPs to be intolerant of breastfeeding. My GP's wife (also a GP) was regularly criticised by her colleagues for extended breastfeeding. I must admit in my own surgery, everyone always said 'good for you' when I said I was still breastfeeding.

[RedToothBrush]

The fact it has knocked your confidence and potentially mental health by being thoughtless says all you need to know.

Doctors swear an oath to 'do no harm'. There is no medical reason you should give up. So he should keep his trap shut and be mindful of how he could do harm with thoughtless comments and poor bedside manner.

[beautygal29]

I would complain.It has nothing to do with him it is your body and your breasts. The guy is clearly an idiot and needs pulling up over his "bedside manner."

[ppeatfruit]

Yes I totally agree beautygal29 Him being private is even more of a reason.

[DawgDawg]

Hes a knobjockey. I fed until DD was 2 & put up with this shit daily. Are you STILL feeding her?

Twats, all twats.

[PacificDogwod]

Why is him being private even more of a reason to complain?
Genuine question.

[NameChange30]

Well I would complain if it was NHS or private but I think it's particularly bad if you're paying for a service you could be getting for free; private should be better and not worse than the NHS.

When I made the point initially it was in response to the PP who said that they would complain to the NHS but not in this case, which doesn't make sense to me.

[HildurOdegard]

Was this in the UK? Reason I ask of course is that who guidelines aren't really for westernised countries - I think everyone knows that!