No no to breastfeeding by private GP

[AnotherTimeMaybe]

Ok so last weekend I ended up with a bacterial infection, don't want to be too graphic but throat a mess, nose a mess etc. GP had no emergency appointments left, waited for Saturday in case it got better, out of hours and urgent care out of question cause of long waiting so ended up to a private Bupa GP for diagnoses and treatment. He prescribed antibiotics to which I asked if they are OK for breastfeeding. He asked the age of the baby, I said 18 months and he literally freaked out..."you can't do that hes a toddler". I've asked him what he means, this child is eating solids, I breastfeed for his comfort in the night etc to which he replied "give him a dummy then but not that..."
He was quite categorical, I got defensive - I should have been more assertive but I was feeling rough and I felt he caught me by surprise
I honestly didn't like his attitude as I didn't go there for pediatric or breastfeeding advice. I felt my own GP would have never ever said something like this! This chap was trying to impose his personal views on me in an odd way when clearly that wasn't his position to do so and till now I'm thinking of reporting this. Not sure though I want to cause him trouble, maybe I should just suck it up that certain professionals just don't agree with it over a certain age . But still isn't this a choice?
AIBU to feel a bit hurt by this reaction and WWYD?

[eatsleephockeyrepeat]

I'm so confused that this even happens??

Is there any objective reason why anyone shouldn't breastfeed an 18 month old? And I mean that as a genuine question, am I missing something? Or was this idiot doctor stepping away from his white coat for one second just to tell you "ewwww, I can't believe you do that, that creeps me out - don't do that!".

WTAF??

[ollieplimsoles]

Lol here we go again,

Shepherdessy have a fucking I baked it with my breastmilk, yummy yummy...

[FartyMcFartpants]

Complain. He's talking nonsense. It's bad advice and he needs to get up to date.

[Writerwannabe83]

I had a colleague do a "Bitty Bitty" impression in front of me and some of my colleagues when I said I still breast fed my 18m old DS. I was so upset and so humiliated. I felt like crying. I wish I had stood up to her, I probably would have done if we'd been alone but with three other colleagues there I just wanted to get away as soon as possible

[CandyCrusher]

I wouldn't bother complaining. He's entitled to his views. You DON'T need to breastfeed an 18 month old.
Just roll your eyes and carry on breastfeeding if you know it works for you.

[AnotherTimeMaybe]

Thanks guys and thanks for the links! It's that stupid side of me that thinks of the worst case scenario what would happen to him etc -my emotions bring he worst out of me!
Shepherd Ds is eating food, its mostly at bedtime , it's not to feed him but that's not even the point. Do you think it was his place for this comment, do you think I should stop now cause of what he said?

[AnotherTimeMaybe]

ollie

[ollieplimsoles]

Why even tell him the age of your child? Just say 'a baby' which he is.

I never understood this people have with the way babies are fed. Especially breastfed babies.

Its no business of anyone's what you are doing, it works for your family and that's enough.

[PacificDogwod]

Yes, of course he is entitled to his views. Which means he can BF his child however long he wishes.
What he is not entitled to is expressing his own view (which is against internationally agreed guidelines) with a clear value judgement to a patient. He is absolutely NOT entitled to that.

I would totally understand if AnotherTime did not want to complain or did not have the spare time/energy to actually complain, but there is no doubt that he was in the wrong in his comments.

[Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost]

Well yes candy fair comment. He's entitled to his views, as are we all, but.
Thinking what you like is one thing. Saying what you like is very much another.

[Writerwannabe83]

I wouldn't bother complaining. He's entitled to his views. You DON'T need to breastfeed an 18 month old

I can think of many, many things parents don't need to do for their 18m old child but do it anyway for lots of different reasons. What a stupid argument.

[ollieplimsoles]

Haha thanks op, can you tell I've had enough of goady fuckers this week?

Mothers who breastfeed know its about more than food op, you don't owe anyone an explanation

[AnotherTimeMaybe]

Writer what the hell man? Really ? Don't you just wish you can say "fuck off" to colleagues, doctors etc

[eatsleephockeyrepeat]

You DON'T need to breastfeed an 18 month old

...um, you don't need to NOT TO either??

[ParadiseCity]

FWIW I fed my children until just before and just after 2 years old. LOTS more people do this than you ever really realise.

Seemed to me it was the people who love to tell you that its unnecessary that were the most vocal, but most people really don't care how you raise your very own child. Keep doing what works for you x

[Writerwannabe83]

And I work in a field where we are supposed to actively encourage breast feeding - the problem is there are too many small minded, uninformed and incredibly rude people about.

[FutureGadgetsLab]

He's entitled to his views. He's not entitled to force those views on others.

[PacificDogwod]

I may or may not have deployed 'Did you meant to be so ignorant?' when questioned about why I was still BFing my 8 month old…
I also find "Really?!" said like a petulant teenager with a raised eyebrow v effective.

It is really strange why people get so het up about other people's feeding choices.
And, for the record, I did not feed to natural term, I have BF/mix-fed and FF at various times my various children, I am by nobody's definition a 'militant' mother, but I don't think why anybody would thinks it's any of their beeswax

[ParadiseCity]

If you went to a doctor and they said they didn't like your hairstyle, or you should change your car, or don't play golf it is boring, you wouldn't think 'oh you're entitled to your opinion' you'd think 'where the fuck do you get off criticising me like that?!'

[DataColour]

Mothers who breastfeed know its about more than food

Indeed.

[bluecarpet]

Shepherdessy he can have that opinion - I'm a GP, I didn't breastfeed my kids for that long, I agree that it isn't necessary but I know that some people like it for bonding. it rarely does any harm.

He's allowed to have that opinion
he's not supposed to foist it on his patients, unasked for.

[Osirus]

I wouldn't breastfeed after 9-12 months. No medical reason. I'm pregnant and planning to breastfeed but not after a year. Baby will be eating and won't need it after then and I would like my body back at some point! This is my personal view however and would not judge anyone else for continuing to feed if they wish. The GP was very rude and it wouldn't be wrong for you to give "feedback"!

[Oldraver]

DS is now 10 and I BF him until he was 4. At around 2 1/2 I had a very young doctor berate me for allowing my DC to dictate to me after he ask how long I was going to feed for, and I said "as long as DS wants". I actually had no idea how long I would continue as I was going with the flow.

His words were along the lines of "they are your breasts you shouldn't let you dc dictate to you"

Ah but its ok for a fresh out of Med School (who should know better and has an up to date education) tell me what to do ?

[spiderlight]

He's an idiot and I would be sorely tempted to complain, citing the WHO guidelines, if you feel that you have the energy. Hopefully he's in the minority though. I once had to breastfeed my very distressed two-year-old in a packed hospital canteen because it was the only thing that I knew would comfort him (and it did, instantly). I was feeling horribly self-conscious about it because we'd not fed in public for a good few months, and a group of about five youngish male doctors walked past and all gave me massive thumbs-up signs.

You're doing an amazing thing for your son. Don't let him knock your confidence in that. Hope you feel better soon

[RedToothBrush]

Even if he is a private doctor, surely he is bound by the code of ethics of doctors groups, which I presume he still pays fees to for his registration?

In which case, giving his opinion rather than medical advice in a judgemental way is in breech of that???

I also echo complaining as you have paid extra for a service which you expect the same standards or better of care than you would receive on the NHS.

Its not in line with WHO guidelines and IF YOU HADN'T HAD THE FORETHOUGHT TO ASK you could have been taking drugs which could have an impact on your child. Isn't that in theory potentially medical negligence?

Just because its not common to breastfeed a toddler does not mean its unusual either.