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AIBU?

Stephen Fry should resign from being President of MIND (warning about sexual abuse)

257 replies

EnthusiasmDisturbed · 12/04/2016 17:19

According to Stephen Fry from an interviews he gave in the US

There are many great plays which contain rapes, and the word rape now is even considered a rape,” he said. “If you say: ‘you can’t watch this play, you can’t watch Titus Andronicus, or you can’t read it in a Shakespeare class, or you can’t read Macbeth because it’s got children being killed in it, it might trigger something when you were young that upset you once, because uncle touched you in a nasty place’, well I’m sorry. It’s a great shame and we’re all very sorry that your uncle touched you in that nasty place, you get some of my sympathy, but your self-pity gets none of my sympathy because self-pity is the ugliest emotion in humanity.

“Get rid of it, because no one’s going to like you if you feel sorry for yourself. The irony is we’ll feel sorry for you, if you stop feeling sorry for yourself. Just grow up.”

How can he keep his position with such an attitude. Everyone who works in MH knows of the horrendous impact that sexual abuse can have on someone's life for some it's a life long struggle.

Maybe it's his own feelings that he is fighting against, this is not the first time he has been shown to lack empathy but to have such opinions

I hope he steps down

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EDisFunny · 12/04/2016 18:42

Back in 2013 SF was trolled by a fake account on Twitter purporting to be an American actress, Amanda Bynes. The real Amanda was having a very public mental health breakdown at the time.

The fake account (@AmandraBynes, notice the 'r') tweeted SF that he should die or something equally vile.

What struck me at the time was his response, it was childish and, for a spokesperson of MIND, came across as having very little empathy for others with mental health problems.

It was at this point I stopped following him on Twitter and started disliking him. His current interview does nothing to change my mind.

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Ilovetorrentialrain · 12/04/2016 18:45

I agreed with raininginspringtime especially 'But he isn't telling abuse victims collectively to grow up, he is telling those who are using that abuse to prevent art being free to grow up.'

I do however think his wording could be improved to avoid the kind of misunderstanding (which I genuinely believe this is) that's happening here.

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BillSykesDog · 12/04/2016 18:47

Don't forget, as is clearly documented he was off his meds and not at all well at the time. But suspect that means I am championing him, not just pointing out an unfair comment

So distress and self pity are only acceptable reactions from those whose MH issues are not caused by sexual abuse? Are those whose MH issues are not caused by trauma somehow more authentic and deserving of sympathy.

My comment still stands. He was 'triggered' by a bad review. Someone else may be triggered by something related to abuse.

In both cases I would say that although it's unfortunate the triggering item shouldn't be censored. But it's still hugely hypocritical for someone to dismiss other people's distress as 'self pitying' when you've suffered a similar sort of triggering distress yourself over something really fucking trivial.

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OurBlanche · 12/04/2016 18:50

OK! Though I think you may be reading an entire library into that one sentence!

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ConfuciousSayWhat · 12/04/2016 18:50

Last I heard self pity wasn't a mental health disorder, let alone one of the severity of bipolar disorder.

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EnthusiasmDisturbed · 12/04/2016 18:50

I do not think he is the right person to be president of such a charity given that a huge number of those that they support will have suffered sexual abuse

Grow up Hmmthis is used to belittle people and make them feel shame for an opinion or emotion they may have something many will be trying to move on from

It's very much along the lines of i tell them straight or I tell them as it is mantra

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raininginspringtime · 12/04/2016 18:50

I thought the meaning was perfectly clear and I am not a fan, in fact what I know about him is negligible.

However I am responding to the words and not to the man.

For a long time abuse victims have been told it is the worst thing that could have happened to them and they won't ever get over it.

Unsurprisingly some have agreed.

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SanityClause · 12/04/2016 18:52

You say "hissy fit", I say "depressive episode" let's call the whole thing off.

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Itsmine · 12/04/2016 18:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Waltermittythesequel · 12/04/2016 18:57

So hang on: he's allowed to be a victim of his mental health issues whenever he comes off his meds and has an episode.

But victims of abuse aren't allowed to talk about their triggers because it's self-pitying?

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Alisvolatpropiis · 12/04/2016 18:58

Yes Walter, that's about accurate. SF is a massive hypocrite.

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OurBlanche · 12/04/2016 19:00

Alternatively, SF has as much right to be a self pitying wally as anyone else!?

He is also free to make comments about said self pity, as is anyone else.}

Sauce for goose and gander and all that!

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Waltermittythesequel · 12/04/2016 19:04

Is it really that difficult to make a point without trivialising someone's trauma?

Apparently it is.

Oh, but he's prone to self-pitying himself so he can say whatever he wants and crassly refer to uncles touching nasty places.

He doesn't have to be careful about what he says and the offence he knowingly causes because he's STEPHEN FRY, don't you know?

Please.

This rambling has been shouldn't be in charge of tying his own shoelaces, let alone be involved with MIND.

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OurBlanche · 12/04/2016 19:08

Ye gods! Then again...

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DioneTheDiabolist · 12/04/2016 19:13

Who are the sexual abuse victims who are using that abuse to prevent art being free?Confused

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OurBlanche · 12/04/2016 19:14

?? I thought that got cleared up early on page 1!

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Appleand · 12/04/2016 19:16

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 12/04/2016 19:21

So glad I'm not the only one that's occurred to, Appleand

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OurBlanche · 12/04/2016 19:26

Fucking hell!

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Waltermittythesequel · 12/04/2016 19:30

Oh dear.

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ConfuciousSayWhat · 12/04/2016 19:30

Wow. Just. Wow.

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EnthusiasmDisturbed · 12/04/2016 19:32

Appleand I have reported your post

I rather this thread didn't get deleted and well you know you can't just post assumptions like that it's wrong to do so

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Goingtobeawesome · 12/04/2016 19:33

Glad?

Bloody hell. Hmm

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Ilovetorrentialrain · 12/04/2016 19:33

To everyone outraged on here will you actually go so far as to contact/lobby MIND to try and get SF removed from his post? If not, why not?

Appleand that is an outragous allegation, how cruel.

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Pepperpot99 · 12/04/2016 19:34

I can't stand him. So massively vain and arrogant. That incessant sneery sarcasm which screams 'I'm so vastly superior' . An arsehole of the highest order.

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