To think that it's ok that I didn't bond with my son straight away?

[guajiraguantanamera]

Just that really! It's taken me 5 months to feel a deep bond with my beautiful ds and while I feel guilty about that sometimes, there must surely be other mums out there that felt overwhelmed at the start and struggled to bond a bit! Or aibu??

Of course it's OK

My bond with my first grew. It was overshadowed by anxiety, exhaustion, feeding difficulties and pain for a while.

You have years to build that relationship

Mine is as strong with my first and is is with my second 9with whom I bonded straightaway

For me it was when I started to feel the overwhelming love. Before that I was just going through the motions- feed/wind/cuddle/coo over, but really she was just a tiny being who I didn't know. When I started to see glimpses of personality she became a real person to be and that's when I felt like I started to bond with her.

I bonded with one DT and not the other. Not sure why exactly although the DT I bonded with was smaller and had more of a fight to start with, I worried about her weight gain. She was a placid happy baby despite being small. The DT I didn't bond with was physically much healthier but cried loudly, a lot. You could never sit and cuddle her you had to be walking around. By about 3-4 months I had bonded with both but it took a while for me to stop thinking (in my head at least) that I preferred the quieter twin. Now they are nearly 8 and I love them both equally.

It took me a good 2 months to feel a deep bond with my DD. I certainly didn't feel it whilst I was pregnant with her, nor did I feel it just after I'd given birth. Talk about baptism of fire, I've never been so petrified in my whole life. I wanted to send her back to the hospital for the first 6 weeks!!