to send a bill for the gas/elec/water/etc in return?

[Tinklewinkle]

We live in a popular holiday area and had some friends staying with us for a couple of weeks. They went home on Sunday.

They've always been really good friends, and we've always got on really well, their kids are the same age as ours and get on well too. We've been on holiday with them before and it was fine, although this is the first time they've stayed with us for more than a weekend

Anyway, one evening they'd been out and they rang to see if we needed anything from the shop on their way home. I asked them to grab some milk and a loaf of bread.

When they came in I was given the receipt - for about £2.50. I didn't have any cash in the house so apologised and said I'd sort it out the next day. Then, I'll be honest, completely forgot about it. Nothing more was said until they left on Sunday when they reminded them I owed them the £2.50. I had about 70p in cash in the house so apologised and gave them that.

I got a text this morning to remind me that I still owe the remainder and giving their bank details so I could do a bank transfer.

I've transferred the money as I can't be arsed hearing any more about it, but I think they've got a thunderingly massive bloody cheek.

They've pretty much got a free holiday out of us. They've stayed in our house for free, used water, gas, electricity. They ate breakfast here every morning, we fed them about 50% of evening meals, they used the washing machine and tumble drier, they've had tea, coffee, cold drinks, snacks, etc, etc, so I'm somewhat miffed that they've quibbled about £2.50 and feel like sending them a bill for 2 weeks worth of B&B.

We didn't actually invite them, they wanted to come here and asked if they could stay with us. We nearly always have people staying in the summer holidays, we don't mind in the slightest, we enjoy having guests and are happy to look after them, but I now feel like a mug

[CalleighDoodle]

Im not sure replyingnwould help tbh. They onviously dont see any problem with their actions and any reaponse from you theyll just see as rude!

[tokyobananas]

Unreal. I don't want to believe this is possible and yet I'm getting the ring of truth.

I like the suggestion of calling with faux concern about their money troubles, because that really is the only explanation. And even then, if £2.50 is going to decide between bankruptcy or no then they're stuffed anyway.

[LurkingHusband]

Im not sure replyingnwould help tbh. They onviously dont see any problem with their actions and any reaponse from you theyll just see as rude

I'm failing to see that as a problem .

[fuzzywuzzy]

Oh my word!

I would refuse to have them ever again. But I wouldn't bother emailing, I'd stop contact with them completely. And let mutual friends know why.

We're going to go stay with IL's for a couple of nights and I am already thinking of thank you gits etc. ands we have been invited, cannot imagine inviting myself to someone's home, turning up empty handed and then charging them to replace food I and kids would have undoubtedly eaten!

[suzannefollowmyvan]

A great opportunity for a passive agressive call to ask if everything is ok

ooh yeah, that would be a nice move, very good potential for entertainment

[emotionsecho]

Me too, Lurking.

[McPie]

You would have had a minimum of an evenings drink each bought for you along with a huge box of chocs/bar and a big bunch of flowers on top of the thank you for having us meal out from Dh and I. We would also have contributed more than a loaf and some milk to the household in the time we stayed.
I honestly cannot believe their cheek!

[Jackie0]

Bloody hell, that's the maddest thing I ever heard.
I'd be dining out on that story for years, absolutely hilarious!
Send the email cabbage advised though.

[GoooRooo]

Oh OP I feel your pain. I live by the seaside. In the summer we suddenly get loads of people wanting to visit. Most are great but some are just inconsiderate and downright cheeky and we now make excuses about why we aren't free.

[Roseformeplease]

As a point of comparison, we had friends staying for 3 nights. They brought booze, chocolates and a gift for the children. They also insisted on taking us out one night for dinner. We will do the same when we see them. Most people turn up with all sorts of bits and then make a contribution.

Cheeky fuckers. We live in a major holiday place. One guest was with us for 2 weeks, kept commenting on how much money he was saving and when he left gave us......a tea towel.

He is not coming back!

[Clork]

I don't think I'd be able to stop myself emailing them to point out exactly how much their visit had cost and that I hope the £2.50 made them happy as it had also cost them a friendship

That hits the nail on the head for me. God, who acts like that? I'm completely at these people!

[Mintyy]

"I've transferred that £1.80 for you whilst having the absolute cringe at your meanness. Did you not think for a nano second about all the money you have saved by staying at our house and everything we have spent on food and utilities for you all? Did you not think that you should have bought us a meal or some gifts or made a contribution to the food bills at all? You are obviously completely clueless as to how to behave as guests but I hope you won't make the mistake of repeating this experience if you ever stay with another family again. That won't be us, by the way."

[Tinklewinkle]

I honestly cannot believe their cheek!

Neither can I to be honest.

We've had them to stay before, but only for long weekends so this kind of stuff has never come up, but looking back they've never been especially generous. They've never bought chocs or wine with them, but then I'd not particularly expect it, but thinking about it they don't really contribute anything - we'd usually feed them once at home (BBQ or something), then something like fish and chips which we'd pay for our own, then one dinner out, which we'd pay for our own, but over the course of say 3 nights, it's not so obvious or piss-takery.

Over 2 weeks, when they've not even shouted a round in the pub, it all becomes a bit more annoying and obvious and a massive micky take

I'm going to investigate the cost of holiday cottages, as I really want to point out to them how annoyed I am at being used for a free holiday. I don't expect everlasting gratitude or expensive gifts, but milk and bread???

[Viviennemary]

That is unbelievably cheeky. I'd feel like saying well you can charge us the£2.50 if you like but I'll be billing you for two weeks accommodation.

[Sazzle41]

Tiredbutfine and Midnite's suggestions rock ! Seriously OP, when they arrived/when they visit for shorter weekends do they/did they bring flowers/posh choc - anything? Do you get anything at all in thanks?? That has to be the rudest/tightest thing ever - and from a 'friend' . I never show up empty handed for a stay, its just not polite. If they have form for this re the weekends they stay too, I really wouldn't hesitate to end the freeloaders mickey taking for good.

[suzannefollowmyvan]

coulda said you're really skint but you'll pay it back five pence a month?

[AugustDay]

Really, I find it hard to believe. Are you sure they are not having a laugh.

No one would genuinely ask for 1.80

[Bogeyface]

"£1.80 paid. I am still adding up all the costs incurred for your stay, but the bill should be with you by the end of the week"

[PavlovaPalaver]

Unbelievable cheek. Who on earth thinks that that is OK to do?!?

They should be bringing gifts, contributing money for day to day groceries and paying equal amounts for meals both in and out of the house. And doing a fair share of cleaning up too!

Do you ever go to theirs?

[JeffsanArsehole]

I think your mistake was saying you'd give them the money back later.

To a literal person they focus on making sure they get the money back, they don't think to offset that against the free things they're getting.

I would never have them again or if I did I'd change the language and say before they come 'please bring x/y/z groceries for the house as its too expensive to host people for free now'.

[HelsBels3000]

Wow. This is making me cringe - how incredibly rude. I really hope you call them out on this and post the reply here

[Mintyy]

I find it genuinely hard to believe too, I must say.

[JeffsanArsehole]

I believe it of someone with aspergers or serious issues around money.

[DurhamDurham]

I think you did the right thing to give them the money back.

I also think that you should consider that an end to their free loading ways and having a free holiday at your expense.

Next time they suggest coming to stay for a few days I would just say no, without giving a reason. Hopefully they'll have time to think about it and work it out for themselves.

[YellowTulips]

As someone said up thread the reason why cheeky buggers get away with this is because most people are too polite (or flabbergasted) to point out just how rude and penny pinching they are.

Given you don't want anything more to do with them there is no downside in letting rip here and telling them just how appalling their attitude is.

In comparison we had friends for dinner at the weekend- so just an evening. Every couple brought flowers and (decent) wine to the point I ran out of vases and fridge space!

Your friends attitude is hugely self centred, entitled and ill mannered.