How do you stay on top of everything with kids? Really how?!

[FlyingDucks]

I want to start a thread that will be full of useful ideas and tips for becoming, and staying, on top of everything when you have kids. I know similar thread have been done before, but I'm in need of some new inspiration to get us through the Summer holidays and into a new and very busy school year in September.

I have 2 DC that are not yet at school, and 2 DC in infants school. We live in a 3 bed with no outside space and a tiny kitchen.

While we are lucky to have what we have, I still find it challenging sharing a bedroom with our 1 year old, and having to constantly manage a 2 and a 5 year old sharing a bedroom and toys. My 5 year old needs/loves his own space and quiet time alone. He hardly ever has the chance for this sharing a bedroom with his brother.

These are my 'problem' areas that I want to get on top of. If you have similar issues or are one of those completely organised people that I aspire to be like, please come and share your thoughts!

1. Our kitchen is a constant mess. I could spend an hour in there 3 times a day to keep it spotless. How do you keep your sink free from dirty dishes always? My oven and fridge hardly ever get a proper clean - probably once every 6 months for the oven and it's always dirty ...

1. Toys are everywhere, always! My DC's bedrooms can go from tidy to bomb site in 20 minutes. We only have few toys and they all have a place. DC have 4 small accessible toy boxes each. But still toys are always muddled up with no one having a 'full set' of something to play with.

1. I never, ever find time to clean all the hidden spots (as highlighted in another current post!). Behind furniture, outsides of bins etc never get done. Where do you find the time? I am shattered by the evening, and really don't want to give up a Saturday or Sunday to do it.

1. House admin/banking/paying bills etc. When do you get the time to do all this? I still have school photos from last year I haven't yet ordered :(

Please come and share your tips for success, or just come and commiserate with me.

This was recommended to me recently flylady.net

What a great thread, I only have one toddler but DH and I work full time so it's hard. The house appears quite clean but places like window frames are grim. I'm going to work part time from September and I'm hoping it will get a bit easier then.
What I don't get is all the people who say they clean while their toddler plays/watches tv. I can't take my eyes off DD for a second or she eats cat food/climbs on the furniture/hurts herself etc so only chance for housework is while she naps. We have a long list of jobs that need doing but never get done.
We always make packed lunches and empty the dw before bed. We have started showering in the evening too. DH does all the ironing on a Sunday evening and we batch cook/use the slow cooker a lot. DH usually runs round with the vacuum and cleans the bathroom while I do the supermarket shop and one of us wipes round the kitchen every evening while the other puts DD to bed.
We put items that need to go upstairs on the stairs and whoever goes up takes them and puts them away. Other than that we live in chaos!

No advice on toys because we only have two DC in a 3 bed.

Kitchen. Do you have a dishwasher? It gets emptied before meals so dirty dishes go straight in. I do the dishes after every meal. Never ever anything left in sink. It can be done if you keep your mind on it. I have a preschooler and a 9mo with me.

Bills and admins. I wonder what you need to do at all. I set up direct debit for everything. Opt out of paper bills. Viola. All set. I have YNAB for budgeting. Spending is entered every night and that takes 1 min. Budget is set once a month, maybe 10 min. Things that need organising, I either do it immediately or I add a to do item to todist (app/cloud to do list). Family calendar on google for everything. Managing a household is 10 times easier than a team at work! The trick is never ever put something aside if you can do it now.

Declutter like mad. Anything I don't need goes on gumtree, eBay or charity bags.

Meal plan. I know exactly what we are eating for the week.

Cleaning. I think you have it way harder than me as you have 4 children. They create such a mess isn't it? Have you tried the fly lady? I follow her methods and it really works.

Re admin, everything that can be done online, do it. Get banking apps. That way you can pay bills when you watch tv.

Find yourself a tiny corner of the house that can be used for family organisation. Get a whiteboard so you can write and see everything you're going to do. Get in and out trays. As soon as the kids get in from school, they put all the letters etc from school in the in tray. Once kids are in bed, you scoop it all up, sign what needs signing, add everything to your calendar and chuck it in the out tray for the kids to pick up or straight into their book bags. Or in the recycling, which in our house is under my admin table!

I use my phone for all of it. My calendar is colour coded per each child and has alerts and alarms to help me remember everything. I'd be literally lost if I lost it!

I struggle to keep on top of things too. Our house has very recently gone on the market and so far we have averaged about one viewing a week so I've had to try and keep on top of it a lot more. One thing I found helped was having a clear out of the bits you accumulate over the years, eg party bag toys and cheap magazine tat, pens, random bits and bobs that I'd kept in a box under the bed thinking they would come in useful. I was quite ruthless but it made me feel a lot better. Don't try and tackle things all at once, maybe just concentrate on a drawer one time or a cupboard on another day. Don't put too much pressure on yourself, it's tough when they are little. My other tip would be if you can set up direct debits for any of the bills that can save a bit of time.

Haven't read full thread but toys wise I have one of those ikea trofast units and pictures printed and laminated stuck on each box showing what goes in there....it means both they and I know what goes where and sets stay together. It means everyone can help wth tidying up.

AlternativeLy get big wicker baskets, the bucket sort you would store logs for the fire in, and just lob it all in there. When mine were very small and crawling around I'd lob all the baby toys in a wicker basket and then fold a throw on top and put it in the corner of the lounge to give a cottages feel and hide the mess!

Kitchen wise I have a dishwasher. It's my salvation. If there's any chance at all of getting one in your shoes I would.

Washing wise...I bung it all in together 1-2 loads a day.

Basically I'm always tidying as a go, but I think some big wicker baskets could be your friend.

As for the jobs that never get done....just accept that they will never get done or pay someone to come and do the oven. I paid my sister to do mine as she loves cleaning

Sell your children on ebay, er sorry sell your children's toys on ebay. Ahem

Pointless fan I have that child too! Dd1 would watch TV for hours - dd2 was climbing up the chimney at 6 months! Now she is older she's not a liability but she mithers constantly and cannot bear me to be in a different room when dd1 is at school.
One thing I do when it's a full on job is find something on Netflix - a film or box set and take the iPad around the house with you. I do that quite often when I'm decluttering etc it stops it being so boring

I feel your pain as a working mum of 5. All I can say is Ikea is your friend, my house is full of Killax (?) units with the boxes that slide in, I chuck everything in them. If you keep your carpets hoovered it also makes a room look a lot tidier. I bought a tall fridge for my tiny kitchen and chuck everything in it, pans are stored wherever they will fit, oven, under the sink etc, cereals are kept on top of the kitchen units and I haven't seen the windowsill for years as glasses are kept there.

I have 4 DC too. My top tips for serenity:

1. Lower your standards.
2. Wait for a bit then they grow up and start hiding away in their rooms. Do not go in these rooms except for weekly inspection (followed by pocket money).

Easy :)

Oh yes, I have a space at the bottom of the stairs that they dared call a hall, I got a tall Billy bookcase, a door for it from the bargain basement and use it as a shoe cupboard.

Hi I feel your frustration, having limited space is going to be a major problem when trying to stay on top of the house, you do have your hands full with 4 small children, and what with school drop off and pick ups it takes up your time. I have 4 children but mine are 21,19,5 and 3..there are 6 of us in the house, and I work part time n have a dog lol!! My only advice is really, is to teach your children to clear up after themselves as best as they can for their age. I always encourage my boys to put things away before they get the next thing out. I do suffer bad OCD which means I am on the go from 5.45am till sometime 10.30...I drop my daughter to work at 10p.m 4 nights a week. I am constantly putting things away, trying to find new space saving ideas, we all have loads of big plastic boxes that go under the beds. I'm lucky as all my bedrooms are doubles, 3 of them, but I'm always looking for more space. If I'm not cleaning, sorting, rearranging, organising, bleaching, then I'm working, taxing lol. I do have really good organisational skills though. But I'm a perfectionist so things...everything has to be just so, I drive myself nuts!!!!! Try stacking boxes if u have room, shelves, shoe hanging things that go over doors, hooks, netting that can go in the corner of bedroom, and de-clutter, if you haven't used it for a year, get rid of it or sell it, if u have time lol. When u fold washing put it piles that go in each bedroom. If u have any cupboards...ie storage ones, put a rail at the top to hang coats etc. Hope some of this helps, sorry for being so long winded. X

Try and do a little every day so your days off are not filled with house work.

I have a jumbo clip hanging in kitchen with school/brownie letters on that need action - check it regularly & it makes sure you can find them.

Make a list of short term jobs on your phone - I use notes on iPhone.

Try and keep the washing basket and ironing pile moving - nothing worse than a humongous pile of ironing/putting away.

Get kids involved - feed dog, clear table, hang coats & shoes up.

Sweep & Hoover most days to keep place looking clean.

Always make pack lunches night before.

Don't give yourself unrealistic targets like doing your bedding every week - I do one set each week & rotate.

Make sure husband pulls weight!!!

Definitely dishwasher if you have the space. Ours goes on every evening and is emptied before we go to bed.

One of us runs the kids bath, gets their clothes for the next day out, puts away clean washing and baths the kids while the other cleans up after dinner, loads the dishwasher and runs the Hoover over downstairs.

Declutter and be ruthless. For example, if I read a book and know I'll not read it again, it's put in the recycling.

Dealing with outgrown kids clothes and toys - I have big bags in the bottom of my kids wardrobes, as soon as they've outgrown something it goes in there, then when we're seeing our friends with younger kids I sort through it, bag up what they are getting and the rest goes into a bag in the car to be put in the charity bin next time I see one.

Cleaning in bite size portions. We try to do a bit each evening, while the kids are in the bath or getting dried (after the downstairs routine is done) one of us will change the beds, Hoover the bedrooms, clean the downstairs loo, Hoover the stairs.

A wash goes on every evening on timer to be ready to be hung out the next day before work.

Lunches are made the night before.

I shop at lidl on my lunch break with a list on my phone (app called 'out of milk')/ book a tesco shop to be delivered and add stuff as I think of it / have milk delivered / bulk buy meat and fish in a co-operative scheme (I go once every two-three months) and freeze it all.

We are very fortunate to have a playroom for our kids so don't have to deal with toy clutter. In our old house, before we had a playroom, we had everything in big boxes that would have their lids put on every evening and stacked up.

I have an online calendar which is linked up to our phones and everything goes on that.

I update our accounts on a Sunday night and deal with household admin as it comes along. Try to do as much as possible online. I've a big file box with dividers for different financial information and as soon as something is dealt with it's put away.

We've a bench in the hallway with a lift up seat - all shoes are stored in there. Coat hooks above it.

Shredder at the front door (beside the bench) so post is dealt with immediately and stuff isn't hanging about all over the house.

Sorry it's so long, I got a bit carried away there!!

Robot vacuum cleaner is expensive but brilliant eg Roomba

Tool box organiser for puzzle pieces, Lego ect
Get your eldest child to help you clear up toys.
for vacuuming just get a mini vac, they are so much easier to use for a brief clean.
Wash up in between meals and wipe down messes straight away.

Throw away your iPad/ iPhone/ gadgets and unregister from the likes of Mn.

Also, once the dustmen have been, go out and fill up with hot water, zoflora, bleach, leave for a hour or so, scrub with a broom, empty, leave lid off till inside is dry,
If possible pay everything on line, shopping, bills, clothes shopping, send emails rather than call or write a letter. Plus this means you have a online record of everything. X

this (rather American) site is quite useful,
www.home-storage-solutions-101.com/index.html
I have also used flylady.net, but find all the religious overtones a bit much - and flylady herself only ever had one kid, and lives in a large bungalow.
organizedhome.com/shes-organized sparked her off - that's not too bad.
basically, even 10 minutes spent on a task is better than nothing
Definitely get the kids trained as soon as you can

I feel the same as you completely overwhelmed by my house when I only had 2 children it was easier but I didn't appreciate it back then, now I have 2 messy teenagers who help and don't help all at the same time! 3 little ones 2 and under and pregnant with no6. I have resigned myself to as long as the dishes, clothes washing and general tidying are done then the rest can be tackled if and when I have the energy. There are days when I think I have had enough and don't want to see the little things that bother me the piles of toys or the mess the little ones make but don't be hard on yourself I think all women with children at some point feel like you do. Gosh if only I could take my own advice sometimes too! :) If there are any good points to getting it in order I would love to hear as well. Glad I'm not alone in this. x

I work 4 days a week, have a 15 year old son and 12 year old daughter and a puppy! I've never been the most organised person and hate housework but over the years I've had to adapt and get on with it. My tips would be:

1. if you have dishwasher, empty it at night and during day fill it up as soon as dishes are in kitchen.
2. Also have basin with soapy water in to chuck "non dishwasher safe" items into throughout day and when full, I quickly wash them - usually been soaking for a while so easy to wash.
3. I don't iron my clothes when washed and dried, they just get hung up in my wardrobe and ironed when needed.
4. my husband does his own ironing
5. I have a never ending basket with kids ironing in it, and this lives behind the sofa sort of out of sight.
6. If I'm going upstairs I always try to take something up there that's managed to find its way downstairs...shoes....school bags.....washing etc
7. I have a to do list on my phone and when I think of something I need to do I add it asap into my phone "its called Do it tomorrow". That way when I check the app, I see things I had totally forgotten I needed to do. Also, if I do a chore I love scoring it out on my app. It also lets you see how much you've actually done each day instead of focusing on what you didn't manage to do.
8. have constant clear out of clothes so that ironing and washing baskets etc aren't overwhelmed
9. Get the kids to help - mine hoover and tidy their rooms and do the dishes once or twice a week. Usually after much moaning from me, but they're getting better.

10. I've bought a wee hand held steamer which is fun to use when cleaning although I'm sure the novelty will wear off soon. 11. I always deal with mail/bills etc the day they arrive - although nearly everything is paid by direct debit. 12. Don't worry too much about the hidden corners etc......most houses have them.

What I've also noticed over the years is that my friends houses who are a bit messy and lived in feel more relaxed when I'm there, especially if have kids with me. my friends who's houses are immaculate, I always feel a wee bit on edge if the kids are there or incase I spill something etc. I like to think people feel relaxed in my house.

My DM always says she looks back at photos of our house and can't believe how untidy it was when we were little. Now in retirement she says she is bored of her clean and tidy house, with nothing to do! Just do a surface tidy when people come round. Anything else with four young dc is just impossible (or rather it would be for me)! I have 1 dc who is in nursery every morning and I started the thread with all the hidden dirt, so really even if you had a quarter of the kids, a smaller house and a morning every day, you still might not achieve 'ideal homes' standard!

Another vote for flylady here.

I love the idea (and regularly use it!) of setting a timer for 15 mins and doing something in that time e.g. clearing out a cupboard quickly.

Less clutter = less to clean

Slow cooker = tea ready saving time (we do big batches so 2 nights of dinner!)

Get a cleaning caddy with all your essential cleaning bits in. Microfibre cloths make thing shiny. Shiny things = clean looking.

Pay someone to clean the oven.

Food shop online and plan the week's meals in advance.

If you see something that'd just take a minute to sort, do it there and then.

Don't worry about hidden areas :))))

I don't have a dishwasher. I have a tiny kitchen. It is ALWAYS awful because as soon as it's tidy something is used or messed up. Plus I hate doing dishes after 8pm.

How the hell do people cope with no dishwasher? I feel like all I do is laundry, dishwashing and cooking (on mat leave currently), but dishwashing is the worst.

We have one cupboard left on the outside wall which could access water, but then we'd be really low on storage space.

I'm a lurker on this thread but just wanted to say thank you to all the posters for sharing such great advice!