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AIBU?

AIBU to not know about babies and petrol stations?

174 replies

Beth2511 · 23/05/2015 00:23

Since DD was born I've always avoided filling up on my own so not to have this problem but need to figure it out. Say I have 6 month DD in car when I need petrol, when it comes to paying do I leave her? Do I take her with me?

Baffles me.

OP posts:

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MissDuke · 23/05/2015 07:54

I find threads like this perplexing. I think some people can't assess risk at all. Your child is SAFER in the car when you pay for the petrol.

One more thing - I would really appreciate if you could share your evidence on this please?

differentnameforthis · 23/05/2015 07:54

seen*

fortunately · 23/05/2015 07:57

Funny how the rules are different in different countries.

Where I live, young children of 6 or 7 routinely walk a couple of miles to school on their own.

Squeakycleansparkle · 23/05/2015 07:57

MissDuke what do you think might happen?

BikeRunSki · 23/05/2015 07:57

I left my babies in the car when they were in infant seats (usually asleep), and tried to find rural/quiet/small filling stations where I could get close to the kiosk. By the time they were in big seats, I was back at work and filled up then.

BikeRunSki · 23/05/2015 07:59

sorry, posted too soon. I did once or twice take toddler DS with me into the shop, was not worth the hassle and delay of getting him in and out, crossing the forecourt and negotiating a small shop that sells almost nothing but chocolate! Left him in car with alarm on. If he moved alarm went off! He settled down after that.

Squeakycleansparkle · 23/05/2015 08:00

MissDuke

www.theinjurylawyers.co.uk/injury-lawyers-blog/2013/10/17/slip-and-fall-in-petrol-station-forecourt-injury-claims/

Slips and trips are even MORE likely if you're lugging something heavy like a car seat, or wriggly like a child.

sandgrown · 23/05/2015 08:01

Our mums used to leave us in the pram outside shops. It was the norm in those days. Can you imagine the fuss it would cause now!

MissDuke · 23/05/2015 08:02

Good question squeaky and one I was reflecting on when I posted. Realistically, I know the worst that is likely to happen is that she will get distressed and cry - and that is highly likely with dd to be honest. However I used ot be a childminder, and it was drummed into us that you must never leave a child alone in a car so I guess it stuck with me.

I am not in England, so perhaps there is a cultural aspect, as suggested elsewhere, as like I mentioned before, I honestly rarely see kids left in cars anywhere here, I really notice it when I do see it as it is uncommon.

BertrandRussell · 23/05/2015 08:02

"fortunately Not really...we can be prosecuted if the police find children in a car on the forecourt, or if young children are seem walking to school by themselves, or if young children are left at home."

You could be prosecuted in the UK too- if something happened that put you child in danger. Not for just doing it. You are always potentially responsible for harm happening to your child. So if you leave your child alone in a hot car for hours and it dies of dehydration you could be prosecuted for child neglect, but it's the "hours" and the "hot sun" that's significant. Which is very different to 3 minutes paying for petrol.

Kim82 · 23/05/2015 08:03

I leave them in the car. I usually have my older kids with me to entertain the baby so don't mind leaving them but yesterday was the first time I left the baby in the car by herself while I nipped in to buy milk on my way home (the petrol station was the only shop I passed). She was fine strapped into her seat with the car locked and probably didn't even notice I'd got out of the car!

MissDuke · 23/05/2015 08:04

When I Was young, my sister and I were left in the car and somehow I let the handbrake off and the car started to roll a bit down the hill, a lady opened the door and got the brake back on. Mum nearly killed me but never left us again. Maybe that has mentally scarred me

Squeakycleansparkle · 23/05/2015 08:06

Oooo that's one of my recurring dreams MissDuke! I'm in the back and I can't reach the steering wheel!

ipswichwitch · 23/05/2015 08:08

I always leave mine in the car. They can't get out of their car seats - I can only just get the seat belts undone, so they have no hope just yet! They've always been left so are quite happy to sit and watch the cars. The alternative would be dragging them across the forecourt (because they'd want to touch and look at all the cars!), dealing with tantrums in the shop because I won't buy sweets, carrying them back to the car under each arm (still screaming), then spending an eternity trying to get planking DS2 to bend in the middle to get him back in the car seat.

fakenamefornow · 23/05/2015 08:10

I had a baby, a 1yo and a 2yo. How anyone could think it would be safer for me to get them all out of the car and take them in with me is beyond me.

MissJoMarch · 23/05/2015 08:11

I find if you leave kids with fruit shoot and iPad they are surprisingly quiet and rarely move from car seats

Seriously, it's about risk - if you have sleepy under 2 totally strapped in, them leave them in the bloody car

If you have a wilful, Houdini 5 year old who's fascinated with cars - take them out.

If you have two kids, you just don't care and leave them in th car with promises of Freddos to eat with fruit shoots

pictish · 23/05/2015 08:14

I always leave the kids in the car. I have never actually seen anyone undo a baby from a car seat to take them in to pay at the kiosk, but if this site is to be believed (ha) it's what a good mother does.

Like anyone's got any time for that shit.

MrsMook · 23/05/2015 08:19

I leave them in. DS 2 hasn't worked out how to escape from the car seat. Ds1 is old enough to understand that I'll be gone 3 minutes and don't take your seat belt off. The back doors are deadlocked, so he'd have to make an effort to go to the front to escape.

Compared to wrestling Ds2 in and out of the car seat, lugging him around as if he walked, he'd run off to play chicken with the traffic, staying in seems like the safer option for my sanity if nothing else!

sanfairyanne · 23/05/2015 08:20

you can do what you want. risk of injury crossing forecourt vs whatever risk you think there is leaving them in the car. i always left mine in the car because imo the risk was less.

incidentally i googled law in south australia but it just sounded the same as uk - no official age where you can leave them alone.

you are not going to face arrest etc because its not like leaving them in a carpark or roadside parking where noone knows how long you will be and might worry. this is clearly a two minute transaction within sight of the car so that risk does not exist

littlejohnnydory · 23/05/2015 08:24

We take the children in. All four of them!

MissDuke · 23/05/2015 08:24

See this where I get annoyed - where in this thread has anyone said they are a better parent for bringing their child in? Also, Fake - who commented on that specific situation and said you would have been safer bringing in three under 3's? No one has! If I had three under 3's, I wouldn't have needed petrol as I would have never left the house!!! (hence why my three are spread out over 8 years).

Almost every poster on this thread has criticised my choice of not taking them in. I have saw no one criticise the decision to leave them. So please leave the digs about 'good mum' etc, it is daft and makes no sense. Think about it pictish - apparently I am risking my dd's life by 'teetering' across the forecourt with her. So that makes me a 'good mum' how....?

blacktreaclecat · 23/05/2015 08:30

I always leave DS in the car, he's fine. I can see the car from the pay point and it only takes 2 minutes

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sanfairyanne · 23/05/2015 08:30

MissDuke its just probably some of us are veterans of these kind of threads and invariably they end up filled with smug self righteous holierthanthou posters convinced they are better mums because they make life more difficult for themselves. i dont think it was aimed at you

BeaufortBelle · 23/05/2015 08:30

On the rare occasion I filled up with them in the car I used to leave them in the car although I didn't like doing it. But honestly why does it have to be an issue at all? Just fill the car up in the evening when DH is home or on a weekend morning - or better still get your partner to do it.

Admit that's tricky for single parents but by and large - why make a problem when there needn't be one.

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman · 23/05/2015 08:31

I don't think this debate even crossed my mind when the kids were babies, they were early 90s babies and I didn't have the internet or forums to make me question my every decision.

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