To wonder why we are making our DC do so many activities?

[Happyyellowcar]

Chatting to some other mums today and a couple of them start listing all the activities their DC (3&5) do: ballet, gymnastics, climbing, swimming, theatre groups, rainbows, after school computer group & tennis were all mentioned in the space of 5 mins chat. I did swimming from the age of 7 and a couple of other activities until I left home. Mostly I came home, played out with friends or watched tv if the weather was bad. Why do some people feel compelled to sign their poor tired DC up to a zillion stretching activities from such a young age these days? Is it competitiveness? Who is benefitting here? AIBU to not want to push my DC onto this particular bandwagon?

[itsveryyou]

spindoc jinx infinity waterfall blackout! (according to the DSs this is the current, correct model of jinx)

[GiddyOnZackHunt]

Last year I'd have agreed. DD did one out of school activity. However this year she has picked to add on 3 activities. Plus school invited her to do a G&T class. She's driving it so I'm happy to support it.

[GraysAnalogy]

I would actually love to play kirby/kerby/kerbsy right now

[WorraLiberty]

>

I'll even throw in a free ball.

[WorraLiberty]

That's not my experience at all Politicalstats.

I live in one of London's most deprived boroughs and as a result, there are tons and tons of free activities laid on by the schools and council.

[itsveryyou]

Playing virtual kerby with worra and anyone else who cares to join. We used to use a foam ball, it was THE best.

[WorraLiberty]

We used to dip the foam ball in a puddle and throw it at the back of people's heads

[itsveryyou]

But back to Op's point, we live in the US and while some kids do lots of activities, there as many who don't. It's definitely a stereotype rather than what's actually happening, IME. Our kids do soccer footie and swim in the summer, but nothing else really. They do like to play out but it's too hot and stormy this time of year.

I do know kids who do dance, gym, volleyball, piano, drama, singing, extra maths tuition, basketball and all else under the sun, but they're not in the majority. However, here if a kid excels at sport, there's a good chance they will get a scholarship to college, so its worth their while trying different activities to see if one sticks.

[itsveryyou]

We used to take bites out of the foam ball to give it some interesting surfaces to bounce off in random directions.

[WorraLiberty]

We used to take bites out of the foam ball to give it some interesting surfaces to bounce off in random directions.

[morethanpotatoprints]

We used to play kirby, knock and run or string to the letterboxes. That was ace in a row of terraces. not that we lived in a terrace, too posh for that.
I bet none of you goodies played chicken.
Or gridsy with marbles?

[Charis1]

It is up to the parents and children concerned, isn't it.

Children who are introduced to many activities are more likely to fins an activity or sport that suits them, that keeps them busy, active and disciplined during their teenage years, that helps them develop socially, find like minded friends, and develop self discipline.

There is nothing at all wrong with sport before school, my over active Dc always perform much better academically if he had exercised first. ( so do I!)

We are lucky to have so much available, and so cheap, or free. There is plenty of time to chill out, as well.

The teens hanging round our estate with cannabis or laughing gas are teh ones that haven't developed hobbies and interests and personal challenges.

[GraysAnalogy]

I played chicken until my cousin got run over but I kid you not she bounced off the car and carried on playing. She always said it was because she was 'bonny'. I can laugh at it now but I shit meself when I seen her go flying.

Anyone play postmans knock?

[pearpotter]

A lot of the time with DD1 it's that she wants to try a lot of these things herself. It isn't my idea of fun to be the mum taxi all the time. After trying lots of things she has found one activity she really likes, is good at, and I hope she continues with it.

[justalittlelemondrizzle]

I agree, I know a few people who, after school everyday are rushing off taking their dc's to different activities. One kid does Kumon x2, brownies, swimming lessons x2, tennis, piano and gymnastics. That's a week! All that on top of nightly homework and reading I'm not sure they get any downtime. And they aren't alone.
Mine do brownies, swimming and performing arts, they do a sports club 1 day after school as well.
They have 4 days a week where they can just "chill" Which I think is important. I think giving them a chance to try these things is important but there has to be an equal balance.

[HearTheThunderRoar]

I agree to a certain extent, my DD by year 6 she was doing competitive club swimming x3 a week, drama once a week all year round, along with hockey in the winter for school x2 (practice and game) and representative hockey for our region which was x2 week. In the summer she would be doing Surf school after school x1 and Surf Life Saving x1. She did not have many friends in our community / primary school that she could 'play out' with but she made life long friends through all this sport she did.

BUT by year 7 she was worn out with very little time for her social life, plus the added pressure of Secondary School, I told her something is going to have to give, so she gave up drama, Surf School and swimming and mainly concentrate on her hockey and Surf Life Saving, though she took up water - polo for a few years and she still does swimming by herself once a week. This is NZ though and we're known for our outdoor / sporty lifestyle.

[Littlecaf]

Thinking back to my childhood, we played out most nights in the summer. However I also did violin, piano, netball, swimming and Brownies. I dropped the piano and Brownied aged about 11. I continued to swim and play netball right until Uni and I still play the violin now. Nowadays, swimming is my main exercise and I've met lots of friends through various musical groups and orchestras in adulthood.

My point is you can do both - play and have other hobbies. It's about balance - and what you can afford. I've always felt lucky my parents could afford these activities - they've given me hobbies for life. I can swim better than most of my friends and I am musical. I hope to encourage this with my DC although I'd love them to play too!

[Happyyellowcar]

How do you play Kerby/kerbsy/kirbsy? I spent a lot of time annoying the neighbours as a kid, throwing balls into their gardens or knocking on their doors and hiding. It was lots of fun though I am mostly talking about people who sign their small DC up to stuff when the DC haven't actually asked to do the activities rather than when the DC actually express a burning desire to learn bagpipes or whatever. It's all very expensive and time consuming and I start feeling quite anxious and pressured myself when I hear all of the one-upmanship comparisons. DS1 does swimming and climbing at the weekend because he genuinely loves climbing and I think swimming is a life skill, but nothing after school except the odd play date. DS2 does swimming and a parent/toddler dance class during the week, again which he loves. The minute they decide they don't like the climbing or dancing I would just stop taking them. But I do think swimming is very important.

[chocfemme]

I'm intrigued by Giddy's G&T class....can adults join?

[BsshBosh]

When I was a child I played out unsupervised after school and got loads of exercise on my bike and running around. On wet days we simply hung out at each other's houses. But these days playing out and dropping in on friends doesn't happen much but I'd like DD to have some exercise and stimulation. Hence structured activities. However, I limit her to two after school activities so she can chill and also do homework, and we make sure she has one busy active day at the weekend too.

[mijas99]

I think the activities thing is part of passive parenting to be honest

Its much easier to taxi them around then to actively spend time with them

[Chiggers]

Me too Choc. Does Giddy's DD have a few after school, I wonder?.......