To think this is really uncalled for

[GraysAnalogy]

I recently ran a training session with some colleagues, people invited to attend included professionals of the field, students, and clients. At the end of each session we give out feedback sheets, people fill them in and we read them to see how we can improve. We get a lot of positive feedback, some minor niggles but that's all in the name of the game.

However I've read through the last ones and one comment has really got my back up: 'I'm not sure why the woman speaker had makeup and heels on'. The person who wrote this was a woman too (feedback is anon but there's check boxes for gender, age etc for funding purposes)

I just don't see how this is relevant. I wore small heels (think office) and light makeup because I don't like it much anyway. It's sort of upset me really because instead of feeding back about the learning opportunity, they decided to pick on my appearance.

AIBU here, or is it something you yourself see as an issue?

[LoisWilkersonsLastNerve]

Oh dear I wear heels and makeup at work, another thing for I'm doing wrong in life! How kind of the woman to point that out to you op! Hope you binned it.

[SorchaN]

I'm sure I remember reading an article not long ago about university students and feedback - they'll comment on the physical appearance of female teachers but not male teachers.

In my view anonymous feedback is not really something to be taken too seriously - it gives people an opportunity to write whatever's on their mind without being held to account for their views, and trollers will troll (and feel satisfied with themselves, and keep the rest of their unwarranted criticisms to themselves). If we want serious feedback, it needs to have names on it!

[SaucyJack]

Eurgh. She sounds like one of the tedious bores from FWR who bang on about fanny hair all the time.

[growinggoldwithcustard]

OP I was a personal development trainer for over 30 years. I was told very early on in my career that the sort of feedback you received says much more about the person giving it than about you. Training is a strange profession in that you are "assessed" at the end of every event. No-one comes up to other workers at the end of the day and hands them a completed feedback form on the work they have done that day! I stand to be corrected on this

Take the constructive feedback and try to forget the rest.

[BathtimeFunkster]

Eurgh. She sounds like one of the tedious bores from FWR

Not really. Feminists are very unlikely to single the only woman out for a comment on her appearance.

That's more the type of behaviour you expect from desperate man pleasers who like to get digs in at other women to make themselves feel more pleasing to men.

[GraysAnalogy]

I'm so glad I don't need to do these often growing it's not my cup of tea at all! But got roped in with other colleagues because the NHS is obsessed with these sorts of things.

I'll be happy when I don't have to read another feedback sheet

That's really interesting sorca. I don't understand people, unless someone's appearance was seriously impacting my learning experience I wouldn't even think of mentioning it.

How dare she take umbridge with my bare minerals and tesco shoes....

[laughingmyarseoff]

Lol, we once had feedback with 'nice biscuits, cafe latte (sp?) would be preferable to filer in future'.

YANBU OP some people are just odd.

[thobblywighs]

I once read over someone's shoulder, "Too cold. More thought needs to be put into the venue." It was an outdoor learning course!

[GnomeDePlume]

It's not about you

This was an excellent piece of advice given to me by a fellow trainer with far more experience than I had after a particularly difficult session.

[borisgudanov]

Depends on the course.

DIY - maybe fair point.
IT of some kind - irrelevant.
Equality and dignity at work type stuff - use your magic to bring down a plague of boils and warts upon her, and make sure you order the kind that itch like fuck.

[Chippednailvarnish]

Wonder if she would comment about a man's lack of make up and type of shoes.

People are unfortunately inherently stupid.