To send my fussy eater DS in for free school meals.

[Electriclaundryland]

He is crying and protesting. He's only got two terms that they'll be free for and I want to make the most of it. He wants sandwiches instead like he usually has.

I should add he has a medical condition that means he really does need good nutrition. I was hoping it would help him broaden his dietary horizons a bit. He's dreading it so much that I feel like a bastard.

[HelenaJustina]

Watching with interest.

I have 2 DC currently in KS1 who have hot meals every day. They eat really well and both try/like things that they wouldn't at home. The food quality is fantastic, local suppliers and cooked from scratch on site. Even their cakes/biscuits/puddings are made in-house.
However DC3 will start the same school in September... She will change loads between now and then but I am already introducing her to different things in preparation as I know she will find it harder than her siblings. For example, am making fewer allowances for her and insisting that she has the food on her plate although she doesn't have to eat it.
Agree with all the posters who said start gently, I can see this being what I need to do. Will start with hot 2/3 days a week based on the menus and then build up.

[Goldmandra]

Well, I guess so....just a little amazed at the idea of turning down something free. My kids will be told that's what they are having!

I wonder how many more weeks I should have left my DD eating absolutely nothing from breakfast time until 3.30pm every school day then?

[toptomatoes]

We are mixing and matching for DS. We tried got dinners every day at first, for the first half-term. However, there were some days he refused to eat anything as he didn't like it. We preserved for those few weeks but he is very small and had a lot of health issues in the past so can't skip meals. Now he had packed lunch once or twice a week and hot dinners on the other days.

[HiImBarryScott]

I'm opting out because I don't believe the food my DS will choose will be nutritionally better than the packed lunch I provide.

They have a few choices on the menu at our school, but they always have a snack item available e.g. fish fingers, pizza slices, burger, hotdog. I know he will go for that every time instead of the veggie curry, chicken casserole, jacket potato etc.

[Lunastarfish]

I was a very first eater and has to go on free school dinners. It was fine, I usually find something I was willing to eat but I was 12 so old enough to understand if I didn't eat lunch I'd get nothing until tea

[checkeredpresent]

giles thanks, will definitely be checking....I have enough reservations about moving back as it is!

[hazeyjane]

The children have to eat what is provided....and they all do because there is no choice I suppose.

Again, you seem to believe that it is just down to a child 'choosing' and that food issues could just be solved by being a bit firmer.

[Gileswithachainsaw]

What about a food flask? could you widen his lunch options by doing that?

I dont see him eating a sandwich and limited lunch if you can make it up at home for dinner by cooking something he likes tbh.

All depends on how he's likely to respond.

[Hairtodaygonetomorrow]

My problem was that my dd wouldn't go hungry- she would eat the rice and then the large steamed sponge pudding, or the pasta with no sauce then a chocolate biscuit and nothing else. Not healthy at all, and she was gaining weight. Most children will eat something (a few won't) but is it a good enough nutritious dinner better than the packed lunch? Probably not depending on your packed lunch (mine don't have any sweet things in at all).

I was paying for the dinners though, so the pain was worse! Now we are back on cheaper healthier packed lunches. I would give it a go though.

[Gileswithachainsaw]

Don't see it as a problem- that should read. sorry

[BathshebaDarkstone]

You're all very lucky. The school meals are compulsory at DD's, and as of this Thursday DS's, school. Nursery and reception don't get a choice so quite a lot of the first two years DD was at school she either ate nothing or just cheese.

[hazeyjane]

Also, Checkered. Children will often find something to eat in a buffet style situation, but I think a lot of the schools over here have a set meal every day - so for example dds school menu this week is Mon - chicken curry, Tues - tuna pasta, Weds - burger and chips, Thurs - roast pork, Fri - vegetable casserole - usually with a cold alternative like a wrap and cheese or tuna sandwich also offered.

[loveandsmiles]

Free school meals started today for us and 2 of my DC qualify, however, neither will be eating them. The quality is beyond disgusting. We were invited in to try a school dinner and I was shocked at how inedible they were - they couldn't even bake the baguettes properly! I have 5DC and none are 'fussy' eaters - they eat almost anything and love to try new foods but would not eat the school dinners. Food is brought in from outside and reheated and the menu features a lot of stodgy food.

I think it depends on the individual schools - if your school cooks fresh, local produce on the premises, I am sure the meals would be lovely and my DC would have them, but as it stands I will just keep making the packed lunches!!

[mewkins]

My ridiculously fussy four year old has school dinners (we didn't give her the option). The first half term she barely ate a thing and the teachers were worried. Now she eats some - probably half- and has a good relationship with tje lunchtime assistant. She has tried more food than she would otherwise and is getting on ok. I say give it a go!

[Pifflepants]

That's a good point Bathsheba, we are lucky to have the choice. My DH grew up with an extremely limited diet, and I wonder how he would have coped with compulsory school dinners. Still, it would all be handled v differently these days I'm sure. Or I hope so, anyway!

[LittleBoxes]

It was before the days of free school meals, but we made extreme-fussy-eater DD have school dinners in Reception. This was fine, because the supervisors were quite indulgent and let her only have the potatoes/rice/plain pasta elements of the meals, but once she was in Year 1 they stopped being so soft on her, leading to stand-offs, tears and her missing playtime every day. I supported this (anything to try to get her to eat a varied diet!) but in the end her class teacher called us in for a special meeting to discuss the issue, told me it was affecting DD's enjoyment of school and therefore her progress, and more-or-less ordered us to start giving her a packed lunch! We've been doing that ever since (she's in Year 4 now). So it didn't work for us. Having said that, DD is quite an extreme case - since then she's done a course of treatment at the feeding clinic at St Thomas's Hospital for her eating issues and is slowly getting better, but is still very fussy.

[D0oinMeCleanin]

Most schools in our area have a sandwhich bar as part of school meals. Dd1 used to be a fussy eater. She'd have a cheese savoury bap with mashed potato or pasta salad for her school meal

Dd1 is much less fussy now. Dd2 is very fussy, apart from her vegetarianism I don't tolerate fussy. She gets what we eat (bar the meat, I will serve her another form of protein) and takes it or leaves it. Occasionally dd1 will be nice and offer to make her an omelet instead, usually she just eats or goes hungry. There's still a huge list of food she won't eat (tomato based pastas, mushrooms, onions, seafood (with the exception of salmon and tuna) most cereals, toast, nuts, most salad things, most beans) I still give her all of these things, she just picks them out.

She's having butternut curry tonight, everyone else is having prawn and butternut curry. She'll start off with prawns in it but no doubt dd1 will pilfer them as quickly as dd2 picks them out.

She's 7 now so past the age dd1 was when she grew out of her fussiness. It's just the way she is. There's nothing I've done to encourage it. Like most adults, she has foods that she just does not like the taste of.

[WoodliceCollection]

I would give it a shot. We're in Wales so no free dinners, but dd2 (horrendous fusspot who was underweight, under consultant dietician etc in past) has eaten stew, soup, lasagne etc at school when she refuses same I make at home, so hoping she will gradually get into eating a wider range of things. Not that it's helped me at all as she still won't eat home made versions (or even ready meal versions), but at least I can imagine she's getting some vitamins somewhere. Maybe try for a week and see how it goes?

[Electriclaundryland]

Thanks so much for all the responses. Thankfully (kind of) he has some weight to lose anyway from a prolonged course of steroids. We'll see how it goes.

Glad everyone doesn't think I'm a cow for trying.

[MrsMoppandBucket]

I think it depends on the quality of the food they are serving.

If the food is good, nutritious and well prepared then I would say by all means go for it.

However if it turns out that the food is bad I think it will only make his fussy eating worse. It will reinforce his feelings that certain foods are not nice, because they won't taste nice.

My 3 year old DS is going through a fussy phase. He turns his nose up at everything at home, even things he previously enjoyed.

Luckily the nursery he attends serve him really nice meals and the social pressure of the other children eating, seems to make him want to eat so he gets a pretty good lunch there. Thank goodness.

I'm considering hiring a small band of three year olds to come and eat with us at tea time