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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be annoyed by new school rule?

107 replies

tryingnottobeannoyed · 09/10/2014 20:56

I've name changed for this just in case!

My 2 children (one in infants and one in juniors) have come home from school and told me that the headteacher has told all the children that there it to be absolutely NO physical contact between the children AT ALL.
He has banned Tig and any other chase games because there is touching involved, no holding hands, no high fives and no games like playing families if they touch each other!
I am so annoyed, it's a ridiculous rule to impose and takes all the fun out of playground games and the simple joy of playing with your mates.
The parents have had no information about this new rule at all, no letter or email home, just what the children have told us.

So AIBU to think this is a stupid rule or am I missing the point?

OP posts:
pointythings · 11/10/2014 21:21

This is absolutely barking, the parents need to get together and formally let the head know this isn't an acceptable policy. I'm sure OFSTED would be interested too.

greenbananas · 11/10/2014 21:26

Yes, ofsted might well be interested, as children have the right to play, and this rule is likely to mess with their ideas about what is appropriate/inappropriate play.

ooerrmissus · 11/10/2014 21:37

Guess the school doesn't teach rugby then.....

Absolutely barking. If the head/ governors aren't available to discuss this I'd be taking the kids elsewhere sharpish.

My kids school has been bringing back all the old games. Last week they had an all-school Conker competition. And not only do they play bulldogs but the head has been known to get stuck in and show them how to do it. There have been no more injuries than usual. I love my kids school. Smile

Original poster
tryingnottobeannoyed · 11/10/2014 22:59

No football either. My infant DC loves playing it but they are only allowed to play with small balls and definitely no leather or full size balls

OP posts:
Original poster
tryingnottobeannoyed · 11/10/2014 23:00

I'm making the school sound awful Confused

OP posts:
pointythings · 11/10/2014 23:12

You're not making the school sound awful. The school is doing that all by itself, trying to wrap normal kids up in cotton wool like that. OK, let's by all means have lightweight footballs which are less likely to hurt on impact, but the no touching rule is completely swivel-eyed.

MrTumblesBavarianFanbase · 11/10/2014 23:15

YANBU ShockConfused
Sounds as if the head is out of his depth.
Firm letter ccing governors needed, and get other parents to write as well.

They'll have knock on behavior problems in the classroom if they restrict the way children play in breaks too firmly.

TheNewStatesman · 11/10/2014 23:26

Let us know how it goes, whatever action you decide to take!

ChippingInLatteLover · 11/10/2014 23:30

You're not making the school sound awful, it just is awful... well, the new Head is anyway. Make noise, a whole lot of noise!!

clam · 11/10/2014 23:31

3 things:
First, it sounds ridiculous and yes, put your thoughts in writing to the Head and Governors
Second, it's not true that teachers are not allowed to pick children up if they've fallen down.
Third, there is a good reason for not allowing full-size/leather footballs on the playground at break, as they can inflict painful injuries on those children not involved with the game (and some who are) who are not watching where the ball is. It's bloody painful if you get hit in the face with a leather ball.

tara49 · 11/10/2014 23:36

No running AT ALL allowed in the primary school I work in - In case they get hurt - bought about purely by the amount of precious parents suing the school if their child gets a cut knee.

MrTumblesBavarianFanbase · 11/10/2014 23:52

No leather balls is sensible, but none of the rest of it - why not full size plastic or foam balls?

No running is insane, as is no you hung including tag and clapping and hugs between small children...

Don't these incredibly physically restricted children go stir crazy in the classroom?

MrTumblesBavarianFanbase · 11/10/2014 23:53

Somehow "no touching" autocorrect morphed to "no you hung" ... I have no idea...

steff13 · 12/10/2014 00:11

How sad! My daughter is in preschool (age 4), and one of the teachers greets each child at the door with the child's choice of greeting; a hug, a high-five, a handshake, or a smile. My daughter loves getting a hug every morning from her teacher, and she loves playing house and tag and other games with her friends.

MexicanSpringtime · 12/10/2014 03:55

No running AT ALL allowed in the primary school I work in - In case they get hurt - bought about purely by the amount of precious parents suing the school if their child gets a cut knee

How can a case like that be admissible in a court of law?

actuallylolatlolcats · 12/10/2014 05:08

It's some sort of misunderstanding, it has to be.

There is no way in hell any teacher or governor would think this could be successfully implemented.

I would ask some questions to the right people before I would assume this was actually true.

And if it is, much like pointy said, there needs to be a get together where signatures are taken of the parents refusing to comply to this new rule. If the school ignores it, the complaints just need to be taken further up the ladder until someone sees sense.

I still think it's a misunderstanding though...

nocoolnamesleft · 12/10/2014 05:25

So there's the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child: Article 31 (Leisure, play and culture): Children have the right to relax and play, and to join in a wide range of cultural, artistic and other recreational activities.

Googling...it actually even predates that. As long ago as the 1959 UN Declaration on the Rights of the child it stated that "The child shall have full opportunity for play and recreation, which should be directed to the same purposes as education; society and the public authorities shall endeavour to promote the enjoyment of this right."

This www.playengland.org.uk/media/71062/charter-for-childrens-play.pdf appears to be aspirational by a charity, rather than accepted by government, but has some nice ideas to incorporate.

FishWithABicycle · 12/10/2014 06:33

What a silly rule. Aren't they aware how much some schools are paying for specialists to come in and teach traditional playground games which have fallen out of use, because of the huge benefits to be gained from having these as part of the children's culture? Is this some kind of warped generational experiment to see how dysfunctional they can force this cohort to become?

nooka · 12/10/2014 07:14

My children's primary had this rule for a while, as a part of an anti-bullying initiative we think. It wasn't very well enforced though and my ds challenged it because he thought it sexist (I think he got into trouble for touching a girl under the rules and pointed out that the girls were allowed to touch each other without sanction).

Timetoask · 12/10/2014 07:20

I would seriously consider changing schools if this is true. It's not at all the kind of ethos I look in my child's school. If they are like this about general human interaction who knows what other crazy rules they have about other things.
So relieved that my child's school is normal!

CadmiumRed · 12/10/2014 07:22

Some secondary schools have a 'no touch ' policy, which personally I find over controlling. It is designed to prevent everything from fighting to sexual behaviour to girls getting upset by using linking arms as a way to signal best friends and exclude others. But fighting is always banned anyway, and all negative behaviours can be acted out through other means, so it's all a bit silly and write.

In a primary school it is downright unnatural. To enforce it they will end up 'criminalising' kids just for acting like kids.

mateysmum · 12/10/2014 07:29

What a silly rule.It makes me so,so, sad to think of the reasons behind this. Is the head afraid of sexually inappropriate behaviour? of bullying or fighting? of injury? What does this teach young children about human interaction? That touching is wrong? That playing fun games with your friends is wrong?

If there have been issues with rough play then there are many other ways these can be tackled, which teach children appropriate boundaries and behaviours, not this draconian, joyless madness.

merrymouse · 12/10/2014 07:45

It sounds like the kind of thing I say to my children when they are fighting in the back of the car (which then leads to shouting about who has moved over the line), not a way to manage a playground.

phantomnamechanger · 12/10/2014 09:20

Is the head afraid of sexually inappropriate behaviour?

yes, I wondered whether this was a ridiculous knee jerk reaction to some safeguarding issue.
Maybe a child or children HAVE been doing something inappropriate and the school is keen for it not to happen again/on their watch.

If this IS about a case involving individuals, then it may have been hushed up to protect their IDs, and prevent all the likely fallout from parents overreacting, demanding expulsions, removing their children etc.

But there are other, sensible ways of dealing with these sort of issues that do not involve a whole school "no touching" rule.

TiggyD · 12/10/2014 10:32

So which school is it?

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