To think we are just as entitled to this help as 'older' people?

[Edenviolet]

We have four dcs all with significant health issues. I do not drive and we struggle to get them to the numerous and frequent hospital appts and they also have a lot of illnesses so need to see the gp a lot.

This has meant dh taking far too much time off and when he can't it costs a fortune in taxi fares.

Our gp surgery runs a transport scheme for gp and hosp appts. I phoned today as we really need the help. The woman I spoke to was decidedly off and said the service is really meant for older people, and how had I been getting to appts till now why couldn't I do that. She was very sharp in her manner and quite dismissive. Then she said I had to see the dr to get approved and that they might not and if they do there was no guarantee she would be able to find a driver when I needed one.

I phoned back to make the gp appt and suddenly heard my name in the background- the woman I'd just spoken to was talking about me and dcs to another person and it didn't sound complimentary! The receptionist I was speaking to suddenly realised, put the call on hold then came back on and said , oh I'm really sorry about that.

It has made me feel like rubbish

[lougle]

Ok, you're getting a hard time here. You have 4 children. How many of them have appointments and how many if them get DLA? Do you get DLA? I'm wondering if you could get social services to assess you as a family, rather than individually.

Does your DH earn well, or is his job low paid? Would you be better or worse off if he was to give up work? I'm not suggesting it, but social services can and will suggest it if it prevents care needs.

Honestly, you don't have to answer here, consider - is it the case that you don't have enough money, or are you living beyond your means/a bit crap with budgeting?


If you realise that you're a bit crap with money, there are things you can do to improve that.

[IamInvisible]

I do think the transport should be available to those who need it, but I don't think if one DC needs the appointment all 5 of you would be insured, tbh.

I don't get any taxi tokens in my region, and don't claim my bus pass because I can't get to the bus stop so there is no point. I don't have a Motability car, but do have my own car so use that for hospital appointments. My DLA goes into a separate account and it is used for my needs. It doesn't go in the pot, because IMO it would get wasted.

Out if interest what sort of car do have that costs £280 a month to insure. We have DS1 as a new driver on ours, DH drives 20K+ miles a year and it is £90 a month.

[Tullahulla]

Oooooh, point proven, disability point scoring!

Nice!

[Pumpkin567]

See the practice manager the calls may be recorded.

Talk to them about data protection.

I know nothing about disability payments but if you claim a car, I don't think you should be able to access a free service ( sorry) learn to drive your life will be better. ( I passed 5 time you can do it)

[Owllady]

I agree re the seperate pot but I do take out of ours to pay for electric as I have the leave the immersion on for bathing, the washing machine is on 3 times a day, dryer at least twice in winter, a day, all for my d. I am sure a lot of people are the same. Almost 300 a month for my electric alone. Normal 3 bed semi
I wish I could do a father Jack face

[haveyourselfashandy]

What about the hospital transport service? Ring their hospital department because I know hospital transport isn't just for the elderly,my mum used it for a short while.
I'm sorry your having this difficulty Hedgehog and I hope you can get something sorted.As far as driving lessons go I suspect you are a similar sort of driver to me...I've been learning on and off for 13 years,its never clicked but this time I've been determined and I've got my test soon! You CAN do it.I know its expensive though so I don't know what so suggest there,I know we've struggled to pay for it all.

[AvonCallingBarksdale]

Going back to the original point, I would complain as it sounds like confidentiality has been breached. On the more recent note, I would really find a way to pass your driving test!

[steff13]

280 (I don't know how to make the pounds sign), is a A LOT of money for insurance. Does your husband have a bad record, or is the vehicle crazy expensive? My husband and I each drive and each own a car, and we pay $90 per month, which is the equivalent of 54.64 pounds. So you're paying roughly five times what we do for two drivers and two cars, with full coverage insurance. Maybe you could shop around and get that lower from a different carrier.

I really, really think your best long-term solution is for you to learn to drive. What was it that you found so difficult about it? If you did that, you and your husband could share the car, perhaps you could even come up with enough money for him to get a very small car to drive himself to work.

[haveyourselfashandy]

Transport department not hospital department!

[Owllady]

In some counties you can also apply for a carers grant/break for things like driving

[lougle]

That is a massive insurance. I drive a Galaxy, have 3 named drivers on my insurance, protected no claims, and pay £75 per month, which is high.

[IamInvisible]

£300 for electric Owl!

I thought ours was bad at £89!

See, I think disabled people should get the winter fuel allowance, or at least discounted fuel.

[SingingGerbil]

We get all sorts of people on the transport at our hospital. Admittedly most are older but that is the demographic of the people there. The criteria is basically if you are unable to use public transport, no-one to take you and live far away or have a medical condition where you need a wheelchair/oxygen. I'm sure there are more criteria but I can't think of any at the moment. I can't see why you wouldn't be eligible.

[zebrafinch]

not sure how old your DC are but could you get Social Services to do a Carers Assessment. You have a lot on your plate and maybe the way forward is for Social Services to pay for nursery places.?

I agree with previous posters. DLA definitely does not cover the costs of caring for and transporting children with complex needs.

[BerniceBroadside]

Iaminvisible, there are some fuel discounts available to people who are disabled, on low incomes etc. Used to be social tariffs, but think they may have been phased out for new customers? (Have an eldery & disabled relative who is on some sort of scheme.)

[Edenviolet]

Its a large car and he had a small accident last year so it costs a lot, he's only been driving four years too.

We would be hugely better off if he stopped working, have been told we would get is and full housing benefit etc BUT we are worried that at some point the benefits may stop and dh job is low paid and the only job he can do as has no qualifications so he can't be out of the workplace for years as he won't get back in. He wants the dcs to see him go to work every day too.

[Edenviolet]

We are currently undergoing a caf assessment for extra support and have a lovely social worker but she said its such a complex case its taking a long time.

[steff13]

I don't know what you mean by qualifications, but do you have any? Perhaps you could get a better-paying job than he has, and he could stay home with the children? Since he drives, transportation would not be a problem, and you might be making more money, too.

[SpockSmashesScissors]

That is a lot of money for car insurance, we have a big car, our insurance is £34 a month, if you could get that £280 down it would free up a lot of money.

Long term, you really need to learn to drive and then get a mobility car for you and the DCs to use.

[IamInvisible]

I didn't know that Bernice.

[holidaysarenice]

As young people with serious health issues claim dla towards these increased costs.

Those over 65 can't and so that is why its there.

Also its there for older people who can't travel alone, not those who can't afford too.

[Floggingmolly]

Low paid work requiring no qualifications is about the only type of work you can take time out from without losing your place on the career ladder.
I can understand the wanting your dc to see him working thing; but only to a point. In the short term he is far more valuable to your family as an extra pair of hands (and wheels!).

[failingatlife]

I haven't read the whole thread but those who are saying the Dh shoudn't use the car to get to work are wrong. Op doesn't drive so the car would be sitting outside the house, what's the point in that. As I understand
it,mobility cars can be used for the person supporting the recipient to travel to work to earn money to support that recipient.

[theywillgrowup]

op i dont say this lightly but i would ask dp to give up wok

i undestand the ethic's behind you thinking but it's madness to be struggling like this

if his job was paying loads and had great prospects than maybe stay but when the younger goes go to school im sure he could work again

as a family you have to deal with whats happening now,something has to give and i think it's dh job for a while

lots more positives than negatives that i can see,

[IamInvisible]

There are a lot of large cars available, Hedgehog and you are paying a lot for insurance. Are you sure you can't shop around for a better deal, or a cheaper car?

We have 2 cars, DS1(19) with a year's experience and aren't paying that much, or any where near.