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AIBU?

To keep ds off school tomorrow because he's exhausted?

100 replies

Mittensonkittens · 01/12/2013 12:33

Ds is in reception. He's well below statutory school age being one of the youngest. He has really struggled with being tired anyway and unfortunately is one of these children that is hyperactive when tired. Basically the more tired he is the harder he finds it to sleep.

Yesterday we had a family wedding at which ds was page boy. He just about got through it but today is extremely tearful, emotional and easily frustrated. He can't concentrate and his reactions to everything are very over the top. He won't nap and never has so the best I can do is put him to bed about 6pm.

If he sleeps in tomorrow (going to bed early and sleeping in are the only ways to help since he won't nap in the day as he fights sleep like it's the enemy) would I be unreasonable to keep him at home and have a quiet day? He hasn't had a day off so far since starting and has a full on couple of weeks coming up with school performances and school christmas parties. I would just tell him he was a bit under the weather. He loves school so isn't the sort of child to decide he wants another day off randomly and play on it. It would just be a recovery day. Generally since starting reception we haven't been able to do anything at the weekend so he can recover from the week but it was unavoidable as it was a wedding. We also stopped over at the hotel so he didn't sleep well even when he was in bed.

AIBU?

OP posts:

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lljkk · 01/12/2013 13:17

Most schools are not oversubb'd, I should think.

Wish my reception kids would sleep by 6pm

verytellytubby · 01/12/2013 13:17

I'm really puzzled that you don't do anything at the weekends as he's too tired. That can't be right. All 3 of mine are summer born and yes they were tired in the first term but they went to bed early in the week and weekends were for fun.

bababababoom · 01/12/2013 13:31

gideonkipper - if you decided not to send your child to school until year1, you wouldn't have a school place for reception but would apply the following year for a year 1 place. Legally, children don't have to be in education until the term after their fifth birthday. They don't count in the school's attandance figures until then and the school can't insist they attend full time. After that it would have to be a formal "flexischooling" arrangement with the headteacher.

everlong · 01/12/2013 13:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CaroBeaner · 01/12/2013 13:44

In London most schools and definitely any popular school is extremely over-subscribed!

(but I am not sure what, if any, risk is attached to keeping non-statutory aged children off school)

Bowlersarm · 01/12/2013 13:47

I wouldn't. If everyone kept their children of school because they were tired there would only ever be half a class there. Quiet Sunday, early to bed, and the Christmas holiday looming to recouperate.

JimmyCorkhill · 01/12/2013 13:56

Why don't you send him to bed early as planned then make a decision in the morning? You could always take him in later and explain that you had a manic weekend. Would he be fine to do just the afternoon?

CoffeeTea103 · 01/12/2013 14:11

If you know he is this way why did he go to the wedding?

Farahilda · 01/12/2013 14:12

You can defer until later in the reception year - but you cannot hold a reception offer beyond end of reception year. Normally, you would apply for a year 1 place, and hope that not every school you liked was already full.

It has never been illegal for children to be educated outside their age cohort, but it is very hard to get LEA consent to this. They are not permitted to have a blanket policy, but in practice, you haveto show a high level of additional need.

And goodness only knows what'll happen at secondary transfer.

BlackholesAndRevelations · 01/12/2013 14:16

Oh my gosh, you do have some odd responses. "Why did he go to the wedding?" Seriously?!

I'd say see how he is in the morning, and keep the poor little thing off if you don't think he'll last the day. Tell school he is a little run down. I'm a teacher and I think it'd do him good ti have a day off rather than spend all week trying to catch up. I feel sorry for teeny tinies who genuinely can't cope with the school week.

curlew · 01/12/2013 14:23

"If you know he is this way why did he go to the wedding?"

That is up there with the most bonkers things I have ever read on Mumsnet......

DontmindifIdo · 01/12/2013 14:31

Will he sleep in the car? DS is nearly 4 and won't nap in the day (unless ill), but he will sleep in a moving car - I'd put him in the car with some made up excuse and drive for 20 minutes, if he falls asleep, park up and let him nap.

santandhishappybandofelves · 01/12/2013 14:54

There is legally nothing they can do about poor attendance from a child who legally doesnt have to be there if the place is accepted. They may not like it - but thats all

santandhishappybandofelves · 01/12/2013 14:56

I go to 2 meetings, which are once a month, I take DD and will until the term after she is 5, I have been offered a 6 week training course, with Creche, I cant do it on a school day, for those 6 weeks she will miss school.

ll31 · 01/12/2013 15:00

Think the unable to Do anything at weekends is bit odd. Maybe you need to work on behaviour not pit it all doWn to being over tired

santandhishappybandofelves · 01/12/2013 15:05

(not the whole 6 weeks the day of the course for 6 weeks)

Feminine · 01/12/2013 15:07

I'd send him.

It is reception after all.

They will let him nap if it all gets too much. :)

also, many children attend nursery with similar hours...

jimijack · 01/12/2013 15:15

I wouldn't keep him off school for being tired.
I would compensate today, quiet day then bath & bed early tonight.

My ds is July born, one of the youngest but I didn't keep him off hardly ever.
Really don't see any harm when they are in reception though. It's when they are older it's ridiculous to keep a healthy & well kid off due to tiredness imho.

PavlovtheCat · 01/12/2013 15:20

keep him off.

BakeOLiteGirl · 01/12/2013 15:29

I would keep him off. I did with mine at that age when necessary. Being tired is a valid reason. I think school is a massive thing for such young children to have to adjust to. In fact, enjoy the day with him doing absolutely sod all.

TartyMcTart · 01/12/2013 19:07

I can't believe so many of you would (and have) kept your kids off school just because they were tired!!! The thing is, life is hectic and we all get tired, we have to learn to deal with it in different ways. Staying off school / work is not one of them.

OP, does your son have an illness that makes him so tired? I'd find not being able to do anything at the weekend due to him being too tired quite worrying.

LynetteScavo · 01/12/2013 19:10

Missing a day of school when you are four years old and over tired is not like taking a day off work becuase you're tired.

Adults can pull themselves together, unlike most four year olds.

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SoupDragon · 01/12/2013 19:11

What time will he wake up tomorrow if you leave him to sleep?

LynetteScavo · 01/12/2013 19:12

And it's not unheard of for a four year old who hasn't had a hectic weekend to crash out in reception after lunch.

lilyaldrin · 01/12/2013 19:13

I don't think 4 year olds really need to worry about coping with the working world quite yet.

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