18 month old DS vomiting in cot, CC, AIBU?

[ShiteCompany]

Am really struggling to get DS to sleep in his cot, he has never been a fan, but we go through periods where he is happy enough to settle down after a bit of babbling and will sleep through.

However the last month he has been so unsettled and screams with rage every bedtime . I think he's just getting more aware of the exciting world around him and thinks sleeping is too boring! He can make himself so upset that he vomits within 2 minutes of being put into cot. Then I have to clean him up and usually end up rocking him for up to 45 mins to sleep, but he's becoming ever more reliant on that to settle. Same when he wakes in the night, which he does at least once or twice nightly.

I am now 7 months pregnant, working full time and beyond tired, can't continue like this and want to be in a better place sleep-wise when new baby arrives. Considering controlled crying (we did this at 12 months, going in at 2,3,5 mins etc and it worked great, but went downhill quickly due to periods of teething, bugs and moving house - our fault really for not being consistent). However am concerned about the vomiting, as I know he will be sick as soon as he gets upset. Doctor has ruled out any illness, so I think the vomiting is something of a learned response and I will just have to ignore it, clean him up and persevere. But will it work? And is it an awful thing to do to him?

Partner does as much as I do to settle DS, definitely pulling his weight, and is not overly keen on CC at any age, but he can survive on less sleep than me! And he doesn't had any better solutions!

[monicalewinski]

YY to mumsy & retro.

There's loads of good advice on the thread about how to re-approach bedtimes, please ignore the more hysterical posters.

Best of luck!

[haveyourselfashandy]

Wow apple you sound like a delight to be around.Op,please ignore that post sometimes people have nothing better to do than try and upset a very tired,very pregnant woman.please think seriously about getting a toddler bed and involving him in building it etc it might just break the cycle of him hating bedtime.

[imofftolisdoonvarna]

I know lots of people say controlled crying works for them, but I can't see how it does - ds would get in such a state if we left him to cry that he would never be able to settle himself again. However, co-sleeping is definitely NOT for us either, so in periods of unsettled sleep we would do the gradual retreat. Perhaps this would be an option to try op? Down in the cot and stroking, then just standing/sitting there, then moving towards the door, then just outside the door etc?

[imofftolisdoonvarna]

Oh and ignore the sanctimonious arseholes that always come up on these threads, they never have anything constructive to say.

[paxtecum]

OP: You are 7 months pregnant and working full time.
When do you plan to start ML?
Can you start it now?

[Edendance]

A friend of mine is a neuroscientist, she struggled getting her DS to sleep and what she'd read and heard about cc made her think she didn't want to do it. After having no luck with other methods she went and properly looked at the studies done on sleep training and cc type things and found that all the hype was over studies which didn't actually tell you anything negative at all (or the studies weren't viable). She did cc over 3 nights and he's slept beautifully ever since.

A lot of children have sleep issues, they can become confused what night time is actually for- especially if this idea is re-enforced by activities with an adult during this time. Keep re-enforcing the idea of night time being quiet, dark and boring- and for sleeping only and the child will learn it. A child be generally be far more distressed overall from being sleep deprived constantly over weeks/months than they will from a few nights of crying a bit before sleeping. Never mind about the benefits of a good night's sleep for everyone else in the house!