To think this party invitation is rude

[SlumberingDormouse]

Friends are having a housewarming party. They both work full time and are comfortably off. The Fb invitation states that they will only be providing Sainsbury's basics pizzas, which they got in the reduced aisle for about 50p each a month ago and have been freezing ever since . They've asked everyone to bring their own booze as well as they won't be providing any. AIBU to think that making a point of being this frugal on a party invitation is rude?

[Scruffey]

Nothing wrong with basics pizza, but totally bizarre to include the actual price on the invite.

Would have been fine if it said, "bring a bottle, we have some cheapy pizzas." The rest is weird.

[Blondeshavemorefun]

bring a bottle is normal for any party except those with a licensed bar

but the cheap reduced pizza remark was weird

go and enjoy pizza (sain basic are actually ok)

go and dont eat pizza

dont go

[lottieandmia]

It must be a joke about the pizza! I think it's ok to ask people to bring their own drink - some people drink a lot and how much money they have is irrelevant on that point imo.

[RockOnRuby]

Don't go. They're probably secretly hoping you don't anyway.

[Hemlet]

I'd be fine with BYOB, but if an invite said 'bring drinks because we're not going to provide any' I'd find that a bit unnecessary.

[stickingattwo]

Bizarre - would never invite people to the house without getting some booze in, of course everyone will bring a bottle.

[RandallPinkFloyd]

Where do people get all these friends that they don't actually like?

And why does 'etiquette' come into it when you're essentially 'going round to your mate's new house'?

I dunno, I'm starting to think my friends are weird. We go to each other's houses most weekends, it's completely automatic that everyone just takes whatever booze they want to drink.

If it's a special occasion like a birthday or house warming or we just fancy doing it, whoever's house it is may do some food. Often people will make jugs of cocktails to share, or perhaps drink each other's booze because they like the look of it and there's enough to go around, but there's never any specific rules.

We're friends, it would never occur to us to think about things in such detail. Nowt so queer as folk is there!

OP I would suggest perhaps you'd be better finding some friends who do things in the way you prefer. Just decline the invite. It's an invitation not a summons.

[beepoff]

I think it's probably meant to be funny/silly, not rude.

FWIW my husband had about £120K trust fund he doesn't boast about it though it doesn't make you rich. We used almost all of it as the deposit on our nice but modest house. We have very little disposable income.

[FrancesDeLaTourCoughngIntoABin]

We need to know the wording!

I do see what the OP means. People go to great lengths to make parties they throw "special" - this is like the opposite

[RandallPinkFloyd]

So what if anyone has a trust fund of any amount. Why would that obligate you to spend it wining and dining your friends?

You don't have to justify yourself in the slightest beepoff, it's your money, no one else's business.

Lots of people have family money, it's one thing to be envious but another thing to be resentful. I'd love to have the security of an inheritance but it doesn't make me resentful of those who do.

[cushtie335]

I agree with RandallPinkFloyd (great name by the way, I was toying with calling myself "Mrs David Gilmour") which is I can't understand how many people on MN seem to socialise with people they can't stand and are highly critical of. My time is too precious to spend it with folks I feel are taking the piss out of me or don't really enjoy their company.

[JamieandtheMagicTorch]

I would also guess it's a joke. The kind you'd get quickly if you knew them well, but might be misconstrued if you were inclined to think badly of them...

[justmyview]

OP has disappeared, so we'll never know the exact wording on the invitation

[LilacPeony]

Based on what the OP says in her post I'm assuming the wording is "We will only be providing Sainsbury's basics pizzas, which we got in the reduced aisle for about 50p each a month ago and have been freezing ever since. Please can everyone bring their own booze as well as we be won't be providing any."

[MikeOxard]

What's rude about 'bring a bottle and we're having pizza'? That's a normal invitation imo. Rude would have been 'Come to our fucking party, arsehole, but fuck off by 10pm, you bore the shit out of us and we'll have had enough of you by then'.

[CrapBag]

I'm not sure I believe the detail of the pizza on the invite, no one would actually put that.

As for the rest, when me and my friends all get together, we all bring some food each and drink, I don't see why one person should be expected to feed everyone, especially when you have just paid out to move.

[Patchouli]

A Facebook invitation?
Sounds like they're just having a laugh with people who 'get it'.

Maybe it's an in joke you're not in on.

[cerealqueen]

They are comfortably off because they don't spend much money, hence the type of invitation they give out.

[arethereanyleftatall]

I'll bet there's a big part of this story been omitted.

My suspicion is that this couple always host, everyone coming take the Piss by not bringing anything, including op who has admitted she's stingy.

So the couple have had enough, and have started, sarcastically, detailing that you need to byo in the invite.

[arethereanyleftatall]

I also wonder if anyone who thinks hosts should provide everything, have ever hosted themselves. And I doubt it.

[Ms23]

Was this an email/text invitation by any chance? Sounds kind of jokey to me! I would take along a bottle of cheap plonk and a bag of crisps and have a good time if I was you! If you feel like it, you could always shame them at your next dinner party by being the perfect hostess and providing everything.

[WeAreSeven]

Of course it's a joke! God, a lot of people on this thread sound exactly like my MIL who insists on taking everything absolutely literally and would analyse an invitation like that for a month!
And BYOB is hardly a new thing, is it?

[quesadilla]

It's slightly odd and particularly the wording on the invite. It does sound like its a strange joke. I don't think it's rude though. Far ruder to say you are having a housewarming and then fail to provide any booze or food. At least this way they are managing expectations.

[RandallPinkFloyd]

Can I just say, I really want to make friends with all these people who are going to provide me with booze and food every time I visit. You sound like just my kind of people