Update: is my cleaner stealing from me? Yes she is. WWYD?

[SlowLooseChippings]

I posted a thread on here a few weeks ago, detailing my suspicions that my cleaner was stealing from me. I thought she might have been going through my wallet as I was missing a sum of money the day after going to the cash machine (not for the first time, I noticed it when I had taken out a large amount to pay for something specific) and separately noticed that a five-pound note was missing on the same day from the coin bowl we keep by the door - the one my husband empties his pockets into in the evenings.

What I did: let her know that I had noticed some money missing and asked her to please keep an eye out (I was very embarrassed and she has very little English so I'm not sure how much got through). Started paying her by bank transfer and stopped keeping cash in my wallet. Forgot about it for a little while.

Last week my husband came home from work and asked me if I'd taken money from the coin bowl. It's usually small change or a couple of quid in there but he had put £10 in pound coins in there and forgot to put it back in his pocket that morning. Gone. This week I emptied the little bowl of pound coins - I didn't count the whole lot of small change left behind, mostly coppers, but noted that there were four 50pence coins. Now gone.

So yes, she's pocketing the change. It can't go on, she doesn't have enough English to confront satisfactorily (and she has a key until next week when she goes away and the agency will take it to send me a replacement cleaner). She's warm-hearted and very very fond of my baby son. We are gutted at the thought that we may be about to ruin her life over £2, because she will lose her job. She's also a bloody good cleaner; I am not, and the replacements who have come from the same agency before were terrible. I don't care about £2 here or there. I do care when it adds up to £5 or £10 a week, and I do care that someone thinks they can help themselves.

Is there any way out of this? WWYD?

[Believeitornot]

What do the legalities or nationalities matter? Bulgarian/English/Japanese whatever, she's a THIEF.

Call the agency as a minimum, consider calling the police.

Man alive.

[EffieTheDuck]

Tally up how much has been stolen and pay the agency what they are due less the amount taken.
I would inform the police as she will continue stealing until she is stopped.

[MrsSpagBol]

Hi OP, I am in S London - my cleaner doesn't steal. PM if you want details.

[greenformica]

Talknto the agency and tell them all this.

[SlowLooseChippings]

I just spoke to the cleaning agency (I waited until the keys came back to them today). The lady on the phone was quite shocked and upset and said she would talk to the management and they would have to speak to her and call me back. I don't want to hear from them again.

I'm feeling awful now. What if I was wrong? I was so sure before I called that it was the right thing to do but now that it is going to have awful ramifications for her I'm second-guessing myself. I never saw her physically take anything. She will probably deny everything and I feel a bit sick now for ruining someone's life. I've seen photos of her children, and her husband died years ago.

On the other hand money HAS gone missing. I'm not the only one who noticed it. On the last occasion we both counted it. There are never any neat piles of coins either. All my previous cleaners if they found anything fall out of jeans pockets or washing machine or ironing pile or on the kitchen counters or bedside table would put it aside somewhere obvious for me. And now that I mention bedside table I remember that there should have been some coins there two or three weeks ago, I registered at the time they weren't still there but didn't go so far as to think they might have been taken, if you get me.

[musu]

You need to get your locks changed ASAP. Unfortunately unless you have definite proof she has stolen from you I doubt you'll be able to get the agency to pay for that unless they agree to do so to retain your custom. Personally I'd pay for it myself and find a better cleaner/agency. Not speaking good English has nothing to do with being a thief or not.

[DontmindifIdo]

I think you did the right thing - if she's stealing small amounts from you because that's all she can take, what will she be taking from others? An agency trades off it's trustworthness as well as it's employees skillfulness at cleaning - it doesn't matter how good someone is if you can't trust them, and people talk in small areas, if you were asked now, I bet you wouldn't recommend that agency, someone else might be more vocal about the fact they were stolen from - it's not just that cleaner who could lose her job because of her actions, the other cleaners the agency used could do if that agency gets a bad name because of one cleaner could all lose their jobs if no-one wants to hire that company.

I also echo the advice to change your locks - do that now, even though you have your keys back - she could have taken a copy, probably not, but for peace of mind, just change it.

[HoldMeCloserTonyDanza]

Slow, one of her other clients could be an elderly person. You've done the right thing.

[cumfy]

Gaah, this is a horrible feeling to have isn't it ?

But, I have to say however basic someone's language skills they will comprehend "Money.Missing".

And it is a bit odd that no denial was forthcoming.

Good luck with your new cleaner. :o

[ConferencePear]

Slow, hard is it may be to accept, you have been completely taken in by this woman.
How do you know that the photos you saw are really of her husband and her children ? How do you know that her liking for your baby was genuine ?
You should not be feeling bad about this - she is the one who has done wrong.

[IneedAsockamnesty]

You would not be the one responsible for her losing her job.

She would be.

[Yonionekanobe]

We had a similar problem a year or so ago. Nothing from my purse as was normally out when the cleaner was here but small change disappearing from our dressing table, key bowl etc. We complained to the agency and they said she was leaving anyway to become a herbalist and would be replaced. They were so flippant about it we left the agency and found an independent through a friend. It is more expensive this way but I know at least the money all goes to my cleaner.

[Mimishimi]

Don't feel awful. Imagine if you or your husband were stealing from work, your employer caught you and you were fired. Would it be their fault/responsibility or yours? You may not care about the small change but if you ignored it for long enough, I can guarantee she'd start looking around for more valuable things to steal. I would definitely be getting the locks changed if I were you, I'd even approach the agency to see whether they would go halves on that.

[Monty27]

As a poster upthread said, (sorry poster can't remember you're name).

So, do you know nothing else has gone missing? Jewelry, perfume, clothing and such?

I wouldn't want a thief in my house.

[Proclean]

I know this is a zombie thread but I had to revive it just to say if this is happening to anyone hiring a cleaner via an agency or if it is an employee of a cleaning company, please, please tell the company.

I ask this as a cleaning business owner myself, I get round this by only hiring individuals I fully know the background of - I cannot grow my company any bigger because of these self imposed restrictions. However if I were to send a person out and they were stealing that is MY liability and if that client did not tell me I would continue to employ them and send them our to many of my hard-won and valued clients' homes! :-( This scenario makes me feel quite ill.

Please if this should occur with anyone in the future TELL their boss what they are doing - even if you will tolerate it this person will be trusted in many other homes too if you don't tell.

[butterflyexperience]

Tell the agency!!

Can't believe your dithering over it.
I would not want a cleaner in my home who stole