Ok will try and explain all without dripfeeding but have been made to feel i am BU so looking for opinions...
DD age 8 went to a friends house - there were to be 4 girls. Unknown to me there were also 4 older boys going. Whilst there apparently there was play fighting with wooden swords. This escalated and my DD decided she no longer want to play and went into another bedroom with one of the other girls (lets say A).
This led to the 6 other children swearing at my child and calling her names.
At this point the father of A who had turned up early went upstairs. He witnessed the boys with the wooden sword and told them to be careful. The girls would not tell him what was wrong but did not want to play with the others and were very quiet.
They then came down and asked A's dad to take them home.
When he dropped DD off he stated that he didn't think things had gone very well and that his DD was very upset. When DD got undressed her legs were bruised, bleeding and hugely swollen. My husband took her to A&E where it turns out she has a chipped kneecap.
The following day i get a sheepish phonecall from the host's mother asking if my DD was ok as the girl's all seemed "tense" with each other. I told her what had happened. She said she would look into it. I was perfectly reasonable but said i was unhappy with what had taken place.
As it turns out the phone call was prompted by A's dad calling her and complaining about the same thing....
I left it at that.
I then get an email saying that none of it ever happened and basically calling my daughter a liar. I know that what DD is telling me is true as not only does she have the injuries, the swear words she told me were used are very particular and these children have apparently used these in the past. A's dad also went upstairs several times and what he says correlates with the version i have been told.
The host's mum does not know that A's dad has spoken to me.
So after being lambasted in an email was i really being U when asked if my DD was ok to say no? Apparently her children swearing although she says now that it didn't happen is them experimenting and exploring words.
FWIW another child apparently broke their nose that evening!!!
AIBU?
AIBU to not expect my daughter to have to go to A&E following playdate?
WileyRoadRunner · 01/02/2013 14:01
Your poor daughter! 
I think you've shown remarkable restraint. I wouldn't have been able to help myself from going round to their house and asking for an explanation. I appreciate you don't like confrontation and your daughter is friends with the girl but I don't think it is acceptable to let the other mum rewrite history. Could someone else go with you to speak to her? Either the other parents (as someone else suggested) or your oh, or a friend?
I just dread to think what might happen next if her children feel this behaviour is acceptable. It might not be your daughter next time (as presumably you won't let her attend a playdate again) but its unlikely her children will exercise retraint in future if they're allowed to break bones and have no repercussions. 
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