"It should punch you round the face, with a little kiss after", oh you reckon, Jamie Oliver?

[Katiekitty]

"It should punch you round the face, with a little kiss after"

Jamie Oliver's BBQ sauce recipe.

Fuck off Jamie.

[MmeLindor]

Exactly, Petite.

[TwoStrongArms]

It is hardly surprising that JOs turn of phrase would trigger an image of DV. It is hardly surprising that that would resonate unpleasantly for some victims of DV.

I very much doubt he really meant anything to do with DV, but it is true how deeply violent acts are embedded in our language as metaphors.

JO is a serial offender against the English language - using lazy faux cool overdone phrases like 'pimp your salad' - overdone ironly and no longer equatable with prostitution, I think, and the last programme I saw he talked of 'clank in some herbs / clank in a dollop of cream / clank on a handful of cheese'. Clank?

[PetiteRaleuse]

I doubt the kids in my extended family on Facebook think about the connotations of what they are saying when they go on about being 'fraped' but nonetheless a horrible term, IMO, is gradually being absorbed into the language. It's pretty sickening.

Forgot to say OP, YANBU.

[KittyFane1]

Katiekitty Really good post.
I (obviously) am not offended in the slightest by his turn of phrase despite my experiences but yes, you are right when you say "Aren't we all made up of little bits of our own life experience?". Different things trigger different emotions in different people.

[MmeLindor]

Stickemup
It makes me sad really. That someone could post from a position of pain, and be ridiculed or belittled. Even if the person is being unreasonable, often the feelings are understandable, and so we should have compassion for that person.

I was extremely lucky to go on to have my DC. I know how fortunate I was, and find it heart breaking for those who haven't been so lucky. I hope this discussion hasn't upset you. xx

[KittyFane1]

MMe: ridiculed or belittled Quote please.

[KittyFane1]

Mme Sorry, you were talking to stick I think.

[KittyFane1]

Interesting to hear different points of view, bed now. Thanks OP.

[drjohnsonscat]

I have to say it didn't strike me (sorry - another one!) as bad but then I have never been a victim of DV so it just didn't ring those bells for me. To me it sounded like "gob-smacked" which presumably also literally means smacked in the gob but is used to mean something made an impression. And yes he could have said "punchy" but that also means the same - like punching someone.

Like people say you should "Roll with the punches" . They don't actually mean you should be punched and just go with it. Anyway, I see that it takes many of you to a bad place and for that reason alone it's not good. But I would just be wary of throwing around accusations of misogyny because for those of us lucky enough never to have been victims of DV, it sounds like quite a powerful metaphor to describe food, not an exhortation to DV. And it actually reminded me of the time my DS (then 2) accidentally headbutted me to the point I thought he'd broken my nose then gave me a kiss to say sorry. Bitter and sweet.

Like I say, I get what you are all saying. But it really didn't chime that way with me and I guess it didn't with Jamie either. You can call that ignorance or you can call it not having DV front of mind - which should surely be the norm in an ideal world where DV is not prevalent.

[kickassangel]

you do all know that tv is scripted, rehearsed, filmed many times and edited? those of you saying that it's just a turn of phrase are acting like he got asked a difficult question, got caught out and made an awkward answer he might be regretting.

No.

This was planned. Discussed. Agreed. Rehearsed. Said over and over again.

OF course we all know he's talking about food, but he's using an analogy associated with domestic violence. In a program aimed at women. Just before the month of stop violence against women campaign.

If he put together a show aimed at young children, due to be broadcast in the middle of kids' TV then said that a meal should 'invite you round the back of the bike shed for a quick fondle' would you still say he's only talking about food?

It is NOT acceptable to use an analogy to DV. At all. Ever. In any context.

You don't have to be professionally offended, or an over emotional woman or anything but a decent human being with a moral compass to know that.

In case you're wondering - other things that generally aren't OK to make light hearted quips about include - murder - violence of any kind - racism - genocide (see murder, violence and racism) - child abuse - verbal or emotional abuse.

Geddit?

[Petershadow]

World gone mad

I'm very sorry some people see these connotations

[MmeLindor]

Blimey, Petershadow. I don't think I've ever seen someone use 'world gone mad' in a non-ironic fashion. The Daily Mail called, wondering where you have gone.

Don't feel sorry for us. We are quite fine.

[Angelico]

It would never have occurred to me to find any hint of DV in that phrase but it's just a bit twattish. It's like when Nigella blethered on about parma ham being like tiny melting kitten tongues

Just keep it real TV chefs! It's just very yummy food ffs!

[MmeLindor]

Angelico
Perhaps I'm more attuned to it, due to the work I have done on DV.

Kittens tongues? Weird

[HuwEdwards]

Surely the punch round the face could be a boxing analogy

[AnyFuckingDude]

great post, kickassangel

[kickassangel]

It's quite well known as it sums up the physical & mental assault of DV. They hit you, then say that they love you. That's why it's particularly inappropriate. IF it had been straight forward punching it wouldn't be such a problem.

Still don't think violence is a particularly useful analogy when describing food, although kittens wouldn't be on my list of useful similes either.

[AnyFuckingDude]

Nor boxing

[TheReturnOfBridezilla]

Made me think of DV immediately. JO puts me off my food at the best of times but yuck.

[Lavenderhoney]

No, I don't think he is stupid or dim either. I dont think he is the most famous tv chef in the world. he is not a chef and frankly would be useless in a professional kitchen. He is not even that famous outside the uk. He is famous in the uk for being an annoying cheeky chappie who does yet another cooking show, school dinners. He is a brand and works hard to promote it and make it attractive to people who will buy his stuff.

The phase he used is not chef speak. I know plenty of chefs and they do not talk about food like that and these chefs are older/ younger and not media savvy or need to be.

I never watch Jamie Oliver, he annoys me. But it annoys me even more to think he is or his overpaid production team misusing verbs in an attempt to find new phases to keep up with his take on sarf London Cheeky chappie talk. " crank in the.."

Wonder how his pr company will sort this, as I am assuming he will want everyone to love him about now, what with Christmas coming and book sales important. Cue an apology, Jamie cuddling a few kittens on telly. Etc etc.

[valiumredhead]

So none has ever said that chill or a particularly hot curry 'packs a punch?'

He was talking about FOOD. Context is everything.

[MadameCastafiore]

Oooooooohhhhhhh drooly man strikes again!