"It should punch you round the face, with a little kiss after", oh you reckon, Jamie Oliver?

[Katiekitty]

"It should punch you round the face, with a little kiss after"

Jamie Oliver's BBQ sauce recipe.

Fuck off Jamie.

[KittyFane1]

peas OP said at top of thread : "What he said has distinct DV connotations, like it or not."

[YankTeeDoodleDanTee]

That's exactly it, JF. That's why I wonder how exhausting it must be to listen so carefully to every little thing people say.

It may not have been his best turn of phrase but I doubt the writers were thinking 'ooh, it's edgy, and about DV, let's use it!!'

[WithTheDude]

I agree with you Katiekitty and MmeLindor, this is precisely the kind of crap which normalises domestic violence. It's the little things which cause the culture of VAW. We can call out Ched Evans and Chris Brown and Roman Polanski, but are supposed to "ignore" the little things. The little things add up to the big things.

SGM

[MmeLindor]

JustFabulous
No, I don't think that he meant anything by it. But he is a massive star, with a huge publicity/marketing team who should be more aware of the comments he makes.

Anyone can misspeak, or use an unfortunate turn of phrase. Shame that no one in the production team noticed it.

[YankTeeDoodleDanTee]

Sorry, MmeL, I respectfully disagree.

The OP does need to get a grip. If a turn of phrase on a TV show triggers her, she needs more help than MN can give her.

[KittyFane1]

If you don't agree, then how about, 'I am sorry you were upset by this, but I think that your personal experiences are clouding how you see this', rather than 'OMG woman, get a grip'.
This is AIBU not CHAT.

[peasabovesticks]

KittyFane1
You said it was imagery. What image do you think he was trying to conjure up then?

[YankTeeDoodleDanTee]

Even if it was chat, the OP's reaction to this was over the top.

[YankTeeDoodleDanTee]

The image of spice and sweet, Peas.

[PortoDude]

I am sure he meant nothing at all by it - but it is just another demonstration that we are so immune to violent language and behaviour - oh it's just a turn of phrase - and that such statements are innocent and normal STILL. To the degree that even women who have experienced DV see nothing wrong. It IS VERY WRONG to punch people in the face, and the kiss afterwards alludes to a DV situation.

Why is it acceptable to still say stuff like this? You would not say Nigger, or Retard for example, as (most) people have learnt that this is offensive. Why should phrases that relate to DV still be acceptable to anyone?

[Fakebook]

Sorry why is Rihanna being mentioned now? As far as I'm aware, what happened to Rihanna was condemned by everyone. There's wasn't anything "edgy" about what happened. No one has given dv an "edge" after what happened to her. Least of all Jamie bloody Oliver.

[AnyFuckingDude]

"a punch, followed by a kiss" in relation to a bbq sauce ?

I saw the programme.

I have never been a victim of DV, but it made me wince. Am I using my (non existent) experience to get professionally offended ?

It has got cool these days (apparently) to use "edgy" and shocking statements. I think less of Jamie Oliver for this, I think less of the scriptwriters for feeding him the line and I think less of people who would ridicule someone who was upset by it.

[baublesandbaileys]

he's a twat!

[KittyFane1]

Peas Answered that already up thread.

"he phrase he used came from the word Punchy. Having an immediate impact; forceful. For example chilli would be described as 'punchy'...Followed by a sweet flavour 'kissing me on the lips' It's imagery, an expression."

[MmeLindor]

Tee
she is not the only one offended by it. Although I wouldn't go so far as to say it offends me. I find it highly unfortunate turn of phrase, and think that his people should have reshot that section, but I don't think it was in any way meant to be edgy or controversial.

And yes, perhaps Katie needs to think about why this has upset her so much, but pointing that out to her in such a fashion is hardly kind, is it?

Kittyfane
Does human decency get left outside AIBU then? She is UPSET by this. Why jump on her, just cause it is in AIBU?

[WithTheDude]

It's incredibly unkind to tell a survivor their reaction was "over the top". People react differently to all sorts of things. Some are triggered by words. It's not exactly asking a lot for a man on a major TV show to not use words that convey DV.

[peasabovesticks]

The question wasn't actually pitched to you YankTeeDoodleDanTee
'Sugar and spice' Really?

[KittyFane1]

MMeLindor Not jumped on. Disagreed with.

[YankTeeDoodleDanTee]

It's always been cool to be edgy. See Lenny Bruce circa 1961. It always will be.

This wasn't edgy. It was a stupid turn of phrase to describe BBQ sauce, apparently. I haven't actually seen the programme as I hate Jamie Oliver.

[peasabovesticks]

As I said earlier KittyFane1 you've made your point very forcefully. Why not leave it that and stop repeating yourself.

[MmeLindor]

AF
you could be right about the line fed to him. I don't know how much of his stuff is scripted and rehearsed, but would imagine a lot of it comes from him.

To be clear. I don't think that Jamie Oliver in any way condones DV, and he would likely be horrified to hear that anyone would take it this way.

He is, however, in the public eye, and for that reason he should be more aware of the power of his words.

[KittyFane1]

I can't stand him either YankTee !!

[Lavenderhoney]

There are other ways to describe the taste and aftertaste of food. I have never heard this one used all in one sentence like that. I should imagine he thinks he has dumbed it down suffiently to be understood by his viewers, who are more civilised than himself in describing taste. I don't think he means any harm, it's an unfortunate turn of phase though.

[Katiekitty]

No, I don't get offended all the time, so those concerned I do and need help can thankfully stop worrying.

I don't like it when a tv programme with a popular chef uses language with DV imagery.

I'm pretty sure the programme wasn't live, took several times to shoot and had a script. It wasn't just him getting caught up in the creativity of his cooking and all that.

I'm saying it was scripted by people who think a bit of edgy language is cool.

I think it leaves an unpleasant taste.

[AnyFuckingDude]

I don't hate Jamie Oliver

I think he's a slightly stupid man who was in the right place at the right time. He's not so popular as he used to be though, is he ? That's because stupidity will always out in the end.