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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be fucked off that stroes still feel the need to define toys by gender?

404 replies

GretaGip · 14/11/2012 22:02

I've been wandering around all day looking for inspiration. Hmm

And it seems that within toy sales it's imperatiove to be prosciptive. Sad

Surely one of the major retailers could realise that cupcakes and butterflies for grils and transport and dinosaurs for boys is just ouutdated and break free from the molud and then just sit back and wait for hoards of satisfued MNers to boost their sales.

AIBsimplistic?

Sigh.

OP posts:
FishfingersAreOK · 15/11/2012 00:38

Facebook ,would you be happy if you could buy a wide range of looks in the men's department and only stuff that Jordan would wear in the women's section?

FishfingersAreOK · 15/11/2012 00:39

Fakebook, sorry autocorrect

MakeItALarge · 15/11/2012 00:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Backtobedlam · 15/11/2012 00:41

I've never noticed shops grouped in boys and girls, but they often do it on websites and it drives me mad when searching online, some toys I genuinally am unsure which category they go into, and because I have both girls and boys I have to trawl the lot anyway.

However, I would add that my youngest has been exposed to traditional 'boys toys' from birth-trains, diggers, cars etc.but has actually developed a pink/purple obsession. She always wants the pink cup, pink plate, pink sweets...there is every colour to choose from and she always goes for pink or purple, so I guess there must be something inborn-she showed this liking as soon as she could vagualy express an opinion, by pointing and screaming!

MissPricklePants · 15/11/2012 00:42

just because it didn't do your friend any harm doesn't mean it will not effect girls now. I think toys are far more gendered than when I was young (I'm just 27 so not old) I think barbies et al are far more sexualised. I think some clothes shops provide an appalling amount of over sexualised clothing for young children! To the poster who mentioned girls/boys toys in a happy meal? really?! I work for McDs and we have not done boys/girls toys in erm must be nearly 10 years now! We are def not doing them in company owned stores (Madagascar 3 at the mo).

MakeItALarge · 15/11/2012 00:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FishfingersAreOK · 15/11/2012 00:44

But you, and Fakebook's doctor friend are not growing up now are you? When Ken, Barbie and action man were all on the same aisle? When lego and playmobile were just...there...when pink was a colour. Now pink is...Jordan. You are a girl. You can wear pink. You can make yourself pretty.

Boys...do whatever you want....

Fakebook · 15/11/2012 00:46

It's too late and I can't be arsed to argue right now. Give me proof that girls playing with girly toys affects them mentally, emotionally and I might change my mind. Good night.

FromEsme · 15/11/2012 00:47

MakeItALarge "But all in a size 0 so Id be fucked" - it's that sort of comment that is what I think the problem is. Women are encouraged from such an early age to worry about their appearance. I can't imagine David Beckham's or Robert Pattinson's name coming up in a conversation about clothes and a man's comment being "but he's much skinnier than me".

Fakebook · 15/11/2012 00:48

Stop talking about bloody Jordan.

Startail · 15/11/2012 00:49

Boots catalogue has all Lego, all playmobil, all scooters and all it's Dr Who stuff in boys.
Only really pink passive tat for girls.
Including gendered tea sets and cooking bits which really make meAngry

FromEsme · 15/11/2012 00:50

Fakebook why are you getting so narked? People can talk about who/what they like.

MissPricklePants · 15/11/2012 00:53

I have got my dd (3.5) a pirate ship for Christmas to the horror of the shop assistant 'but shes a girl?!' erm yeah and she likes pirates. She has started showing more of an interest in pink stuff but she says she likes it because her best friend at nursery does. Which is fine, I think its about finding a balance and allowing children to play with what they want and like regardless of gender.

MakeItALarge · 15/11/2012 01:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

verylittlecarrot · 15/11/2012 01:07

www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/newsbysector/retailandconsumer/7523179/Sainsburys-in-gender-stereotyping-row.html

pinkstinks are spot on in their challenges, I'd say.

JoInScotland · 15/11/2012 01:09

Yes, why have two aisles? One pink and one blue? My son loves purple, and is fine with pink and actually quite fancies butterflies ... I have been searching for warm boots that are purple. I find some and then think "Oh dear, they have butterflies on them". Should it matter? I don't care, he will be thrilled, but I worry about what one boy in particular will say at preschool. And the strange looks the other Mums may well give me....

FromEsme · 15/11/2012 01:12

You said she was a size 0 and that you'd be fucked and did a sad face. What is anyone going to extrapolate from that?

Beyond that, how you feel about your weight is not the issue. Talking about weight AT ALL is the issue. Who cares? It's so unimportant and yet women talk about it all the time at any opportunity.

MakeItALarge · 15/11/2012 01:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

KRITIQ · 15/11/2012 01:17

It amazes me that so many people seem to genuinely believe that very small children are immune to marketing messages. It's pretty clear that they has adults have swallowed them hook, line and sinker.

Why have one toy in a boy and a girl version? So they can sell two lots to the same family if they have children of both sexes rather than one.

As a child in the 60's, we didn't have the pink for girls, blue for boys crap. Even though socially and politically, there was less gender equality, there were fewer constraints on children dressing and playing with toys designated by gender. I think I and my friends turned out fine without a single princess costume in the dressing up box or a preschool make up set.

What worries me is not just the segregation of "this is for boys" and "this is for girls" which starts at birth. It's the messages conveyed in those different toys, clothes and activities.

Ever tried buying shoes for girls that are hard wearing, practical for serious physical activity, easy to clean, let alone not in pink or maybe purple at a stretch?

The "princess culture" tells little girls that being pretty, passive and pleasing to others should be their goal. Boys get the message that being tough, competitive and making/doing things is what they should aspire to. Oh, and whatever you do, just don't do anything that makes you look or be seen to act like a girl. What does that say about the relative value of boys and girls?

What gets me is so many people insist that this is all natural, like it's been this way forever. Nope, this has evolved to the current state of play over the past 10-15 years. I can see it from photos of my own childhood and my nieces and nephews after that. I remember it from trips to Early Learning Centre in the 80's when it was a sea of primary colours, hardly any pink in sight and far, far less gender segregation of toys (and sections certainly weren't labelled by sex, as they are in many shops now - crikey!)

FromEsme · 15/11/2012 01:22

I didn't say anything about Jordan that was someone else. Why talk about weight/size at all, that's my point. Not something men tend to bring up.

MakeItALarge · 15/11/2012 01:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

sashh · 15/11/2012 01:40

GhostShip

If you are studying nature/nurture then you should know that pink for girls is a new idea, not an old one.

Startail · 15/11/2012 02:18

Sainsbury's email is just as Fucking bad.

All toy household appliances that I connect with mindless drudgery, iron, washing machine, kettle and toaster.
In the girls section. Almost all the Lego and playmobil in boys.
Hello kitty and Minnie Mouse stuff that almost certainly isn't as well made for girls. And loads of Silvanian family tweeness.

I know they have lots of MN fans, but animals in dresses living in cute plastic houses make feel faintly dizzy.

Einsty · 15/11/2012 05:17

OP, YAsoNBU! I can on to say 'still' though? It's worse than it was when I was a child and my parents would not have been able to afford toys that would only be played with by one gender... So f-ing depressing that this sort of insidious gender stereotyping goes on in 2012 - and that so many parents have convinced themselves it has no ill effects ...

GhostShip · 15/11/2012 07:35

Sash - I'm talking about gender stereotyped toys.