To think (D) P attitude stinks re the war dead

[Shinyshoes1]

My son is a sea cadet and he's marching for rememberance Sunday .
For a start he huffed and puffed when I said we'd be attending reminding him that our son is among those marching in memory of the fallen and in support for our serving forces
He then moaned that we've arrived 25 minutes early . He's now pissed off for a coffee
Among the comments he's made today they've included
"I don't know anyone that has died in the war "
"in what way does respecting those in wars affect me "
"speaking German would make no difference to me as we'd know no different"
"Those serving in wars at the moment know the risks when they sign up"
" I didn't ask our country to go to war with Iraq and afghanistan "

I'm literally frothing at the mouth and I've told him that I'll teach my children to respect. He's now pissed off to the coffee shop where I hope he fucking chokes on his latte .
AIBU to think he's a fucking disrespectful cunt

[irishkitkat]

I think that your DPs attitude is terrible but there really is not much historical evidence to support the theory that had the Allies lost WW1 we would all be living under a German dictatorship. In fact the shape of Europe today would in all probability be quite similar. There is a whole body of evidence which supports the theory that had WW1 ended differently,especially regarding key clauses in the treaty of Versailles, then we would never have seen the rise of Nazism and the horrors of WW2.

[Kewcumber]

Personally I do take time out to remember the impact of war on all involved. You can be thankful and still ask questions.

Yeah right - and the OP's DP sounds very thankful and thoughtful and questioning doesn't he

I think you are projecting what you feel onto him. His comments and behavior don't show any respect for anyone - dead, alive, known or unknown - only his childlike need to make the morning about him and his wants.

[noblegiraffe]

The time for asking questions is not when everyone else is being thankful. That is just rude and attention-seeking.

[Kewcumber]

irishkat - if the OP's DP actually had that degree of education/insight then I doubt he'd be behaving like a 5 yr old.

And remembrance day doesn't specifically commemorate WW1 any more

[irishkitkat]

Well that's true, and as I said I think his attitude is terrible especially today. But I do believe that a lot of people get confused regarding the differences between WW1, which IMO was a completely unjust war in which millions of bright young men were sent to their deaths for completely spurious reasons and WW2, which was just and necessary. We should remember not just today but everyday the sacrifices made and as a people should declare 'never again'.

[Iamsparklyknickers]

Rememberence Sunday is about taking the time to stop and think. Yes it's about paying respects to all those who sacrificed their lives and those who contributed to protecting our freedoms through military action over the last 100+ years, but it's also about remembering the circumstances that led to those losses of life and sacrifices of previous generations.

I don't get offended by people starting a debate about the legalities of the current regimes, we should be reflect on what's happening in today's world and consider the lessons of previous wars - that's the whole point imo, we can respect those on the ground without respecting the people calling the shots and demanding answers off them.

However, showing such a lack of respect for the occasion where people in attendance are there to show theirs and lack of support for your dc tells me your dh is just parroting arguments that he hopes will make him sound intelligent and not like a spoilt brat who doesn't want to stand outside for a couple of hours.

[Startail]

My Grandfather was 16 when he signed up.
He came within mm of death. Had a German solider not directed him back to his lines he would have died delirious and alone in no-mans land.
As a child I saw the scar on his head and the stifness in the right side of his body. As an adult learned a little of the horror he endured.

Today stood at the War Mamorial and I honoured him and the Fermanagh who saved his life and all those who suffer in the conflicts of our world.

YANU to be displeased with your (D)P

[Startail]

And the German who saved his life.

I have no idea what autocorrect did there.

[BelaLugosisShed]

You are correct, his attitude is appalling.
DH is just back from our local parade, he hasn't missed a year since 1995, he was standing chatting to an old Jewish gentleman, when it came time to lay the wreaths, the old guy handed DH the wreath from the Jewish association and said it would be an honour if DH would lay the wreath, the person who normally does it was too frail to attend , DH was stunned and asked if it was ok because he isn't Jewish, the old guy said that the medals DH was wearing made him more than qualified to lay it.
DH was choking back tears as he was telling me.

It still means an awful lot to an awful lot of people.

[HELPMyPooIsStuck]

My Grandad harrumphed and griped through every rememberence Sunday, he fought in world war 2 but absolutely did not want any part in it, he was a gentle, grumbling old duffer and the fact he'd killed people haunted him until the day he died.

He was so against his part in the war his medals are lying at the bottom of the Irish sea somewhere where he 'chucked the buggers'.

I'll be raising a glass to my Grandad today, and those who fought alongside him because 'arseholes who will never have to get their hands dirty' made them fight.

[Frontpaw]

I missed page 2 but where is your DP from? The whole world as well as the country we live in today would be a very different place had men and women not fought. If he's a brit, then there must be some people further back in his family that either fought or lived through WW2 at the very least. My parents were children then and I was brought up tp be bloody grateful that their parents fought and that we didnt live in a country at war.

I did have a bit of a go at some idiot who spouted about this not being his country, not getting a poppy (imperialist aggressors etc), blah blah blah (eh, you were born here you twat, and your parents chose to come here for a better life).

It sounds like he fancied a morning having a lie in with a cuppa and the newspapers and is having a kiddy strop. I suggest a few good war morvis for this afternoon. All Quiet on the Western Front, anyone?

[IvanaHumpalotCountDracula]

As I said on another thread - I am very grateful to the government for allowing my great grandfather to settle here ( he was Jewish) and for my grandfather returning alive from the war. Without these two events I doubt I would be here, or at least not living the life I have now. Also, my grandmother (Jewish) if Germany had won, would not have been allowed to marry my non Jewish grandfather.

It's not about the language we speak but about the way we are able to live our lives.

[Iamsparklyknickers]

help it's people like your grandad, who although doesn't sound like he wanted days like today,who really strike a chord with me today.

As he said he did the dirty work despite it going so strongly against his beliefs and I'm the one who has indirectly benefitted. His part in the war meant my grandparents were able to walk out of the work camps at the end of it when so many of their friends and family were unable to.

I feel grateful today to those who fought including my other set of grandparents even though it was something they couldn't ever fully embrace. Those were horrendous times with very difficult choices for people.

[IneedAsockamnesty]

Does he also pay no attention to any news on the grounds that it does not effect him, have no interest in any history or world news other than sport?

[ladymariner]

Well said soverylucky

Op, tell your dp to fuck right off with his vile, hideous, disrespectful views....you and your ds deserve so much better than this fuckwit

[clam]

We managed to get 120 seven and eight year-olds to stand in silence for 2 minutes on Friday to show respect for the war dead. They did it without complaint. Shame your arse of a partner can't do the same.

[spoonsspoonsspoons]

Remembrance Day is "Lest we forget" the sacrifice and the waste of life on all sides in war.

It's not about only remembering those who died fighting for freedom, or those who died saving 'our country' or sacrifices made by British soldiers it's acknowledging the loss of life across all countries.

Arguing with anyone who questions the purpose of the day using nationalist statements like 'fighting for our country', 'you'd all be speaking German' makes me uncomfortable and it doesn't surprise me that some people in turn associate remembrance day with supporting war.

[WelshMaenad]

Fucking hell, my TWO year old managed to stand still and be quiet to observe the silence. What's his excuse?

[3littlefrogs]

He is ignorant and disrespectful IMO. Sadly, this kind of behaviour is getting more prevalent as many people fail to teach their children what Remembrance Sunday is about. You would think people would be less ignorant with the number of people being killed in recent and current wars, but sadly, it seems not.

I could not be in the same room with someone like that, never mind in a relationship.

[TheBigJessie]

spoonsspoonsspoons

You're entirely right. Nationality and side doesn't matter. All of those who died were someone's children.

[Kewcumber]

technically spoons this isn't true it's acknowledging the loss of life across all countries - in the UK is a to commemorate the armed forces loss of life across the commonwealth.

Of course in practice I don't know anyone who would have a problem with it being a personal marking of the innocent loss of life across the world in conflict.

Something tells me that the OP's DH (who of course had the option of thinking about the civilian losses of life on both sides if he so chose) wasn't going to commemorate anything except a tall skinny latte. Would be interesting to know if he feels so strongly whether he went to any of the anti-war rallies OP?

No-one needs to be forced to remember anything they don't want to but not supporting your wife and son to whom it is important in favour of a coffee and a whine seems to me to be the height of dickheadedness not a principle of any sort.

[Alisvolatpropiis]

There is nothing wrong with saying the war dead and veterans were fighting for our country...that is exactly what they were doing. That's the job description.

[foslady]

One of the many reasons I remember is because I know I wouldn't be here if the outcome had been different. My dad is 60% blind. He would have been killed as soon as they realised his disability.
It's not just those who died, it's also all those who suffered that I remember - the women who lost the loves of their lives, the brothers who argued before going back into conflict and one of them not returning and the children who grew up with just a photograph for a father.

Lest we forget.....we end up with the attitudes of your h........