to be shocked that I heard the teacher shouting this to a primary age child?

[CrapBag]

I was in the school the other day. A class were having PE, I don't know what age group. It was a male teacher with a particularly loud shouty voice. From the shouting I established that a boy had cut in the line (they were lining up to leave the hall). The teacher really shouted at this boy about cutting in and how rude it was etc etc, really going for it. Then we heard "YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A BULLY" shouted to this lad.

I know I don't know this child, he may be a bully. I don't know the context other than he cut in line at the end of PE but I was quite horrifed really to hear a teacher shout, and I do mean shout as in bellow, at this lad and call him this.

I must admit I am a fan of labelling the behaviour rather than the child. I am by no means a perfect parent but if DS is playing up, I will always tell him that what he is doing is naughty etc, not that he is naughty.

I wouldn't have been at all happy had this been my DC. I know it wasn't as mine is in reception and this was an older class.

Should I be shocked? Am I just being too precious at my first born being at school now?

[MoRaw]

Kalisi, if this if that. We can think of all possible scenarios. As I said before, we do not know what really happened. Neither does the OP. I am going on the assumption that the teacher is not some mad abusive woman and something led to her shouting at the child.

All this extreme nonsense about advocating the return of flogging, etc, etc, makes this whole thread distasteful. I am always amazed at how some people get so hysterical that they are unable to have a level-headed and calm discussion - appreciating that people will have different views. All this anger and frothing at the mouth, what's the point?

As for the teacher shouting and what she shouted, I frankly see nothing wrong with it (I expect a lot of people to jump up and down about that). I do not believe that this incidence (if it a one off). I myself do not shout at my kids and when I was a teacher I never had a reason to shout (mind you I taught teenagers). However, if this child was being a bully, then yes, they were being nothing but a bully. If the teacher got fed up and shouted, who are you to judge that you would not have done the same? Again, I am assuming this incident was a one off as we do not know otherwise.

[baskingseals]

i think you'll find the teacher in question was male, moraw.

[MoRaw]

LOL! My friend today told me she is training to be a teacher. I was speaking to her while typing. Multi-tasking hmmm.

[MoRaw]

It's not possible to amend posts so I writing yet another to address an earlier point. Someone mentioned whether anyone would like their boss shouting to them "you're nothing but a bully". Well, of course not. No one likes being chastised. However, the real analogy is this; suppose I am bullying other work colleagues and the boss witnesses this bullying. For some reason, the boss has enough of my bullying and shouts at me that I am nothing but a bully. I may not like it but I am sure observers would think I very well deserved to be told off. I would not expect that in chastising me the boss' aim would be to make me feel good about my behaviour. So obviously, I would not like it and that obviously would be the aim of the boss' rebuke.

[AgentZigzag]

I made the same mistake in assuming it was a woman as well MoRaw, and that makes much worse to me because mens voices are so much louder than womens (in most cases, not including mine).

Have to laugh at 'Get a life my dear lady', where did you dredge that line up from?

[ilikemysleep]

MoRaw, I enjoyed the irony of your responding that you won't be responding :)

My own view is that calling a view that many on the thread espouse 'wishy washy' and implying that it casued the London riots - and saying that posters who express a POV of distaste at bawling at a pre-pubescent child who appears to have committed the major crime of cutting in line are 'frothing at the mouth' is not exactly respectful.

However, we will have to agree to differ. Thankyou for your judgements upon my courtesy. I shall, of course, be altering my debating style forthwith now I am enlightened.

[AgentZigzag]

ilike, you've been told

[MoRaw]

LOL! tsk tsk tsk. Someone sounds annoyed! Have a good night my dearest ilikemysleep! You are also very welcomed re. my judgments and very pleased that you feel enlightened.

Agentzigzag, I can imagine with a man bellowing it could be bone shaking. As we do not know what exactly happened we are (I believe) arguing based on our biased views on how bullies should be rebuked. The OP just provided a springboard.

[ilikemysleep]

Haven't I just?!

[MoRaw]

So ungrateful. You've forgotten the enlightened bit? It's told off AND enlightened.

[ilikemysleep]

I'm just delighted that even now I am well into my 40s I can still strike a juvenile pose :)

[MoRaw]

Oh for shame! At least something to be proud (ashamed?) of. Juvenile, hmmmm. Now you have enlightened me as I never thought it was something I should aspired to be described as in my 40s.

Anyway ilikemysleep, I REALLY like my sleep so goodnight, sleep tight and don't let the bed bugs bite!

[flow4]

If you spend time in a school and you're not a teacher and not used to it, it can be pretty shocking. There is an unpleasant amount of shouting in many (most?) schools. But more often, it is the tone of voice that some teachers use that is horrible - a kind of sarcastic, patronising, hectoring tone. And my pet hate is the sarcastic 'trick question' that children soon learn they cannot answer any way without getting into more trouble, e.g. "So you think it's OK to answer me back?!" It's nasty.

Of course it's not OK to shout "You are nothing but a bully!" at a child. The shouting and the label are both nasty. The teacher is modelling bullying behaviour to all the children - showing them exactly how it's done... And I wouldn't be at all surprised to find there was a lot of bullying in this particular teacher's class. :(

[greyvix]

YANBU. The teacher is reinforcing a bullying culture.

[Dominodonkey]

Maryz- any parent who is more concerned about how the teacher rebukes their child than in the bad behaviour of their child is frankly an idiot.

[AgentZigzag]

You've just confirmed what I suspected Domino - I am an idiot after all.

I feel better for knowing that actually, it means everyone will know what to expect from me.

[flow4]

Another idiot here, too

[Dominodonkey]

No wonder teaching is so difficult when parents are more worried that their child may be offended than that their child may be wilfully and violently hurting and upsetting others.

[Dominodonkey]

Actually you said you would be in shouting if your child was called a bully. You should have been shouting/discussing with your child why he/she thought that bullying was acceptable ad what they were going to do to make it up to the child they had bullied.

[AgentZigzag]

The lad the OP's talking about has been wilfully and violently hurting and upsetting the other children has he Domino?

I must have missed the OP explaining that bit.

[AgentZigzag]

I'm such an idiot.

[flow4]

You're missing the point I think Domino. The point is that children learn from other people, and if a teacher shouts at a child, s/he is teaching all the children who hear that shouting at people is OK. Bad behaviour from a child needs challenging, of course. But the teacher needs to do it constructively. There's a very old fashioned saying that's appropriate here: "Speak as you would be spoken to".

[Dominodonkey]

That is why I said 'may be' - and while there is no way any of us can
Know I find it very unlikely that this was the child's first offence. The teachers reaction sounds much more like someone who had been fed up of a child's continued aggression to others.